Tag Teaming
by Sarah1281
Summary: At a loss for how to get Dean to say yes, Michael comes to a startling realization. Lucifer is having the exact same problem with Sam and if they work together they're much more likely to get consent this century and can move on to killing each other in peace. He doesn't want to hear anything about how unconventional this is and, yes, the apocalypse is absolutely still on.
1. Chapter 1

"Humans," Michael announced, "are absolutely impossible."

"I've always thought so," Raphael agreed.

"And Dean Winchester is more impossible than most."

Raphael didn't know about that. Dean Winchester had helped Castiel trap him in holy fire but clearly it was Castiel's idea as how would a little mud monkey even know about such things or get holy fire? He felt Dean was just representative of his entire infuriating species but he was the only human Michael actually needed something from.

"I don't understand why he is being so stubborn," Michael continued. "Does he _want _Lucifer to destroy humanity or something?"

"Somehow I doubt that," Raphael said. "He seems to be against the whole apocalypse in the first place."

"Well none of that is _my _fault," Michael protested, looking almost wounded. "_Lucifer _is the one who wants to destroy his species."

It was remarkable how quickly Michael managed to forget the part he played (or rather, had others play) in starting things off. Clearly, despite what Michael was constantly saying about how everything he did was destiny, he was a little less confident about aiding Lucifer than he pretended to be. Raphael understood the feeling but they would more than make up for helping to set Lucifer free by finally killing him once and for all.

Unbidden, thoughts of Lucifer danced through his head. He hadn't seen his brother for almost as long as his father had been gone. He was painfully aware of just how long that had been. What was he like? Raphael was well aware of just how much he and Michael had changed since then. Had Lucifer changed? Was he dark and demonic? Filled with hatred for his brothers and their father? Driven mad by the millennia of solitude? Did he no longer care about them? For all of the many, _many _things Raphael had felt towards Lucifer through the ages, indifference had never been one of them.

What if he was repentant? What if he wanted to come home? He hadn't approached them but would he, really? Even if he still wanted to destroy the humans, was that something heaven even opposed anymore?

What if he hadn't changed at all? What if he was as brilliant and beautiful as ever? Fallen but not fallen, magnificent and terrible, blasphemous and oh so tempting. That was the Lucifer he had last seen, mere moments before he had been sealed away.

It didn't matter.

The apocalypse demanded the death of Michael or Lucifer and Raphael would always, _always _choose Michael.

"Humans are flawed," Raphael said.

"He _knows _what's at stake," Michael said, frustrated. "Zachariah sent him to a future where he does not consent and so Lucifer wins!"

"Dean seems to dislike Zachariah," Raphael said. "Perhaps he would be more receptive to a different angel."

Michael thought about that. "He might be but I don't understand why he dislikes Zachariah. Perhaps he would dislike on principle anyone attempting to convince him to say yes."

"He did not dislike Castiel. Though he did corrupt him so that worked worse than Zachariah."

"Zachariah will never be corrupted. The only bearable thing about this entire situation is that Sam Winchester hasn't said yes, either."

It was a little petty to get hung up on that but Raphael was equally sure that there would be no living with Lucifer if he could take his true vessel and Michael could not, particularly since heaven had more time and resources to convince Dean Winchester to save the world while Sam would be signing on to destroy it.

"Perhaps you two could commiserate about the arrogant and unreasonable Winchester brothers," Raphael jested.

Michael smiled. "That would certainly surprise him. I-" he broke off.

"What?"

"Your idea may have merit."

Raphael blinked. "My…idea? Michael-"

"I do not have any better ideas."

"Going to complain to Lucifer is not even an idea!"

"Not complain," Michael corrected. He tiled his head. "Perhaps a bit of complaining. But I am going to see if he wishes to join forces in obtaining our true vessels so that we may begin our battle."

"You wish to…team up with Lucifer in order to bring about the apocalypse?" Raphael asked. That was, of course, nothing like their previous actions. They may have had similar goals as Lucifer but they hadn't worked with him and they _certainly _hadn't worked with demons. What Michael was proposing was madness.

"I am not making progress with Dean and by all accounts Dean is keeping Sam from saying yes. The apocalypse will happen but only once the Winchesters consent," Michael said. "Why delay it when Lucifer and I together will surely be more effective? I do not wish to have to continually bring our vessels back from the dead for hundreds of years before they finally consent."

Michael was not wrong. Not completely.

"You would only be working together so you could get around to killing him sooner."

"It may be a little…awkward," Michael conceded. "But Lucifer and I have been committed to our course from the very beginning and we will not falter." He almost sounded sad. "If he does not mind then neither shall I."

That wasn't quite what he had meant but Michael was notoriously difficult to reason with when it came to Lucifer or doing what he felt he had to do to be the good son.

God was dead but Michael would never believe it and, as God's successor, he never had to. And it was almost…nice to see Michael's continued faith, especially since his own had burned out years ago.

"If this all goes as well as I expect and you two end up cancelling the apocalypse or something, I want it known that I was against this."

Michael laughed. "You worry too much."

* * *

Lucifer was standing at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean and appreciating the beauty all around him. It was even better for being untainted by human filth. His plans were progressing fine (with the obvious exception of Sam Winchester) and he was in no hurry.

He tensed when he felt Michael's presence. His brother hadn't taken a vessel but that made no difference; he was made of sterner stuff than the humans.

It was…unexpected.

He hadn't felt any trace of Michael since he had finally been cast out, so very long ago. It was so familiar it _ached_. He hadn't met many of his kind since being freed. And, true, it had only been a few months since he had risen triumphantly from the depths of hell but it had been so long since Michael had betrayed him. He had met with a few little angels who had realized that he was right all along but they were too awed and terrified of him to be of much interest.

Castiel, at least, was better on that front. One brave little angel, stolid and loyal, throwing it all away for the mud monkeys. The vessels, even. Rebelling against heaven but refusing to join the other rebels and have some sort of chance for success.

Honestly, Lucifer rather liked him. He was almost adorable. It would be unfortunate if he were forced to kill him.

He hadn't expected Michael. He hadn't expected Raphael and his unwavering loyalty to Michael or Gabriel and his inexplicable inability to choose, either, but certainly not Michael. Not yet. They weren't ready. And the vessels were off playing at monster hunting.

He didn't outwardly react.

"Lucifer."

Michael was killing the fish.

"We need to talk."

"I wanted to talk," he said casually, "but all you wanted to do was cast me into hell. Into _hell_, Michael, never to be freed until the end where I must kill or be killed."

Michael's discomfort was palpable. "I did not come here to discuss that."

Lucifer crossed his arms. It was a very human gesture but it made his point quite nicely. "I have nothing else to say to you."

There was so very much still to be said but how could any of it actually be uttered? Michael had betrayed him and thought him a monster (he _never _would have cast Michael out). The time was running out before they would kill each other. Lucifer couldn't honestly say that he was looking forward to it, even though winning would mean finally being allowed to eradicate the little insects. What sense was there in sharing what had happened since their last meeting? How could they casually discuss something else – anything else – with their fight hanging over their heads? And he wasn't about to apologize which was all Michael wanted.

"Be reasonable, Lucifer."

"Why should I when you refuse to?"

More fish died as Michael clearly held himself back. "Sam and Dean Winchester refuse to accept their destiny."

"That is humanity for you," Lucifer said. "Sam will agree. He has been being prepared his entire life. He does not want to play a part in destroying humanity but he is closer to saying yes than he would like to pretend. If you are having difficulty convincing Dean to aid you in destroying the devil and saving the day then that's a little pathetic."

"Sam will never consent so long as Dean is by his side," Michael said confidently. "And Dean doesn't trust Sam enough to leave him."

"Are you telling me that your incompetence may delay my obtaining my true vessel?" Lucifer asked politely.

Another increase in the intensity of light and vibration that accompanied a vessel-less angel manifested on Earth. Michael hadn't changed. Lucifer almost wished he had.

"The two of us have the same goal," Michael said.

"That would be a nice change."

"I propose that we stop dividing our efforts and attempt to convince Sam and Dean together."

Whatever Lucifer had been expecting, that was not it.

"You…want us to work together in paving the way towards our battle to the death because of our irreconcilable differences? Mostly those differences being that you believe Father wants you to kill me and I want to not be killed?"

"That is _hardly_-" Michael broke off. "You are a monster, Lucifer, and wish to destroy Father's work."

"I have some questions for you about how, exactly, my demons managed to break sixty-six seals right under your nose and free me," Lucifer said. "It never worked before."

"It is destiny," Michael said shortly. "Do not trivialize this."

"Oh, no, far be it from me to make the fact you want to kill me anything less than glorious purpose."

"Would you like to stop pretending that you are just going about your business and I have decided to randomly murder you?" Michael asked tetchily.

Lucifer tilted his head. "That does seem to accurately sum the situation up."

"No matter what I may want or not want, brother, the simple fact of the matter is that I cannot begin the apocalypse," Michael said. "I am to kill you during the apocalypse. Perhaps if you really feel that strongly about me not killing you you could try not meeting the conditions of our fight."

Lucifer raised an eyebrow mockingly. "What happened to grand destiny? How is it be destiny if I can just stop?"

"You won't."

Annoyed, Lucifer looked away.

"Since we've established that this apocalypse is happening and the only thing that is standing in our way are two self-important humans, will you bow to reason and work with me to further both of our goals? Or do you prefer to wait until a time that's convenient for the Winchesters?"

Michael did have a point about one thing. Sam and Dean did not want the end of their species and so were not about to just say yes if left alone. That was why Lucifer was working on his vessel and all of heaven was working on Michael's. Not that that was in any way an unfair advantage, no, not at all.

But working with Michael? When the end goal was to fight? Surely just one archangel (plus or minus all of heaven) was enough to persuade a human. And while it would be nice to see Michael again before the end, if he actually let himself remember why he had ever dared allow himself to think that the perennial good son might have stood by him it would only make it that much harder when that day came.

He was no fool. All of his brothers believed that Michael would win but what did that mean, really? All his demons believed he would triumph. Of course, they hadn't been around for the most part the last time this had happened and still hadn't picked up on how much they repulsed him so maybe they weren't the best judges. But the heavenly host wasn't unbiased either.

This was a ridiculous notion. He didn't need Michael's help even if Michael clearly needed his. Everyone knew that Sam would break first.

He should say no.

He should.

"I'll think about it."

* * *

"He is doing this on purpose," Michael accused.

Raphael had heard some variation of this more than a few times since Lucifer had claimed he needed to consider Michael's proposition but he managed to keep his boredom fairly well hidden and that was really all Michael could ask.

"It is rather an unexpected idea," Raphael said patiently. "How would you have reacted if Lucifer had been the one to approach you with the idea?"

"I would never have trusted him," Michael replied promptly. "But it's completely different. He is a monster and I am not."

"I do not disagree, brother," Raphael said. "Still…do you truly believe that is how Lucifer sees the situation?"

"Of course not," Michael scoffed. "He would never cast himself in a bad light. He probably still thinks I betrayed him. But how was I betraying him when he asked me to stand against _Father_? I did what I had to do. If he were not so far fallen he would have done the same. He _should _have done the same."

"And if Lucifer had been too eager to assist with your plan you would have suspected some sort of trickery," Raphael continued.

"I will probably suspect it anyway," Michael said. "This is Lucifer, after all. Though I do not know what he could possibly seek to do. There is little point in trying to kill me just yet because we will meet on the field of battle once this plan succeeds. No matter what he does to Dean, I can simply restore him. And surely he wouldn't be so foolish as to think he could get away with scattering my vessel's ashes throughout the galaxy."

"If you are going to be this suspicious, and I more than understand why, I must confess I have my doubts about this plan of yours."

"You had doubts before."

"More doubts, then," Raphael said.

"I don't need to trust him to work with him," Michael said. "It really is in _both _of our interests. He needs me to take my vessel for him to be able to take his."

"And yet you still feel his thinking over your rather revolutionary proposition is him antagonizing you."

"It is a simple yes or no," Michael said. "This is a power play, Raphael, you know it is. I presented my offer and now the impetus is on him. He can leave me waiting as long as he likes, especially since my even approaching him in the first place indicates a weakness in my position."

"You have time," Raphael said. "Let him be immature if he so chooses. This sort of power play is an illusion. If you do not get impatient his attempts will fall flat."

It was a little late for that, honestly, but it wasn't as though he needed to admit that, now did he?

Michael was about to reply when he heard Lucifer. "He's finally decided. He agreed."

The long-suffering look on Raphael's face was really quite uncalled for. "Where will you two be meeting? Of course you won't sojourn back to hell."

And the day that Lucifer was allowed back into heaven was a day Michael would certainly not live to see.

"He suggested a human establishment," Michael said. "I do not understand the point seeing as how he hates humanity and it is not as though the presence of human witnesses will prevent either of us from doing anything. More games."

"You don't have to go through with this."

"It was my idea," Michael said. "I can hardly refuse now."

Raphael hesitated. "I cannot help but think…Michael…"

"Speak."

"The two of you working together towards a common goal, even if that goal is the apocalypse and your destiny, it is not exactly what I would have expected. It's been a long time since the two of you were on the same side and, regardless of what he may say now, it is not as though either one of you _wanted _to fight," Raphael said carefully.

"What are you trying to say?" Michael asked.

"This might make things harder. With the two of you working together, perhaps getting a chance to sort out your differences while you work on the Winchesters, is the apocalypse even still going to be on?"

"Do you really think he would?" Michael asked. "Knowing Lucifer?"

"No," Raphael admitted. "But if I am worrying overmuch then I am worrying overmuch. But if something does happen, I want to know what you will do."

"I-" Michael broke off. "I will do my duty. You know that."

"But will it still be your duty if he no longer poses a threat?"

"He won't change, Raphael," Michael said tiredly. "He never has. Even when he rebelled, he didn't change, not really. It was only the situation that changed. That's why he will never be sorry and he will never stop and the apocalypse will proceed like it was always going to. Just, hopefully, a little faster than if the two of us had to do this on our own."

"Even if that's the case and nothing changes, actually spending time with him before your battle will only make it harder and it is already a heavy burden you bear, to be tasked with killing Lucifer."

"What of you, Raphael?" Michael asked. "You never have to see Lucifer again if you choose not to but you'll still know what's going to happen. You still know what I will do to him and what he will try to do to me. Do you have any doubts? Would you want to stop this if he finally saw the error of his ways and repented?"

It was a terrible thing to doubt. In the lower ranks it could not be tolerated and Michael did his best to remove any trace of it from himself. But Raphael was different. Raphael was the one of them who _stayed_. Gabriel's desertion was not as appalling as Lucifer's but it was desertion just the same.

Raphael was quiet for so long that Michael thought perhaps he wouldn't answer at all.

"I'm tired," he said finally. "I want this to be over. Father's gone and you know that I cannot share your belief that He will return."

"You do not even believe Him to still live."

"Perhaps that is me being optimistic and says something about the state of things if that is what optimism looks like," Raphael says. "To believe Father yet lives is to believe He abandoned us and leaves us lost and directionless still. It is better to believe that He died."

Michael didn't want to hear that. He didn't have any answers for his brother, much as he wanted to, and the things that comforted him (the knowledge that he still had his duty, the belief that it was all part of their Father's plan and he was always right, the hope that once this was over their Father would return) never seemed to help Raphael.

"You know it is Lucifer's fault he left."

"Perhaps," Raphael allowed. "But Lucifer had been imprisoned for a very long time and he still stayed away. One fallen angel and he would abandon us all. Lucifer remains the favorite after all this time."

That was another difficult truth. Michael had always done everything for the sake of pleasing Father while Lucifer wanted to destroy everything but somehow Lucifer was always the favorite. Their father was never wrong but it was difficult, sometimes, to understand.

"You didn't answer the question."

"I need things to change, Michael. I do not believe that Lucifer ever will. But if he does and we can have peace and Lucifer can yet live? I would accept it."

"It would not be God's will," Michael protested.

"If Lucifer does repent, after everything, then if He still lives it would have to be, wouldn't it?" Raphael asked. "It would explain why Lucifer wasn't killed back then and prove that He works in mysterious ways. You don't know."

The idea was terrifying. If Lucifer could be saved then how would he even know if it could be done? Would that make it his failure when Lucifer would not allow it? "But I know Lucifer."

"May you be granted all the patience you need for this," Raphael told him.

Michael managed a smile then went to meet Lucifer.

Lucifer was sipping something out of a straw when he arrived. A few patrons were staring at him but what did that matter?

"That is…not Dean."

Michael frowned. "Did you think that I would ask you to aid me if I did not need help in this? That I would show up to flaunt my success in your face?"

Lucifer just took another sip.

"Lucifer-"

"Don't 'Lucifer' me," Lucifer interrupted. "You want to kill me but you taunting me would just be going too far? You really need to sort your priorities out, Michael."

"Stop acting as though you won't be trying to kill me, too," Michael growled.

"Self-defense."

"You could make killing every human in here seem like self-defense."

The woman sitting closest to them quickly stuffed the last bit of muffin in her mouth and headed for the door.

"And if I were to just refuse to fight you I don't suppose you'd let me continue on apocalypsing," Lucifer said.

"Of course not."

"See? Self-defense. And, for the record, if you would like to hide up in heaven while I destroy these maggots I would be perfectly happy to let you so it's pure aggression on your part," Lucifer said.

Michael would never win a battle of words with Lucifer though they both knew that Michael was right. Or at least he hoped they both knew that. He didn't even know what he'd do if Lucifer was farther gone than he thought and actually believed the words that came spilling out of his mouth.

After a few minutes passed in silence, Lucifer sighed. "I was wondering at your having found a vessel so quickly."

Michael felt his temper flare up. "Was that your game, then? Ask me to meet you in this human establishment, with the expectation that I take a vessel, and then watch me fail?"

"If you couldn't find a vessel that was not on me," Lucifer said. "I managed to find one pretty quickly."

Michael eyed the mortal his brother was wearing critically. "Perhaps a little too soon. That one won't last you."

"Nick," Lucifer said, glancing down at his hands. "He doesn't need to. He does the best he can and no one but Sam Winchester would be better. I could, I suppose, start downing demon blood but I'd rather deal with the side effects of Nick hosting me than something of that sort."

Michael really couldn't blame him. "This is John Winchester."

Lucifer tilted his head quizzically. "The father? How did you ever manage to convince him to aid you in convincing his sons to take us as vessels? Or perhaps, if he could be persuaded, he does not believe it's the terrible fate our dear boys do. Or did you lie to him, Michael?"

"I did not lie," Michael said, offended.

"Then how?" Lucifer asked, leaning forward in an exaggerated display of enthusiasm.

"John is against the apocalypse but it is not his body I intend to fight in. He knows that I would have found a vessel one way or another and, unlike with his sons, he cannot even weaken me by refusing to consent. I believe he also wished to save his dead son from being brought back to serve as my vessel."

Lucifer looked almost wistful. "What it must be like to have a father concerned for your well-being."

Michael clenched his jaw. "If Father were not concerned for your well-being, you would be dead."

"And I suppose you would have killed me?" Lucifer challenged. "Like you're going to? He can't be _that _worried if that's really what he wants."

"He gave you thousands upon thousands of years. If you haven't learned by now, you never will."

"Be honest, brother, did anyone really expect me to learn anything while trapped in a cage in hell unable to communicate with anyone except in the rarest of circumstances?" Lucifer asked.

No, he honestly hadn't. But what else was there to do? Even a brief moment of communication with Azazel had led to Lucifer's freedom. And true Michael had done nothing to stop it but that was because this was something that needed to be faced and delaying it would do nobody any good. It really should have been handled long ago.

Michael closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I inhabited this vessel once before, years ago but very recently, when Anna went back to kill him and his wife to prevent the birth of Sam. He didn't remember afterwards but now he knows that I saved him, his wife, and his son exactly as I said I would. And he believes seeing me like this will have a negative impact on my efforts to persuade Sam and Dean despite their knowing this had to be voluntary. And there were…conditions."

Lucifer snorted. "There always are. Nick asked for his wife and child back but I told him there was nothing I could do there."

"That's not true," Michael objected.

"Perhaps not," Lucifer said. "But better to lie before taking a vessel than breaking a condition of the possession itself, is it not? What did he want? Nick settled for revenging himself against God for the loss of his family and, as that was my plan anyway, it shouldn't be too difficult. If John is anything like his sons he'll want the moon on a string."

"Maybe not as much as that," Michael said. "But he did want to be returned alive to this world when I am done with him as well as his wife, the mother of his third child, his dead son, and several hunters on a list he gave me. He wants Sam and Dean restored to life the next time either of them needs it following our battle. And he wants a guaranteed place in heaven for himself and his family. With Sam being what he is, I can see the sense in that."

Lucifer chuckled. "Is that all?"

"It's more than most think to ask. So many are happy to be doing God's work and aiding angels and some ask for healing or protection for their families and it is nothing to promise that. It is nothing for me to promise all of what John asked and at least I know that he will not fall apart on me even if he is not the one I truly want."

"You could have gotten consent for a lot less. For nothing, really, save what you already intended to do. Just tell them you need them to help save this world."

"I could have gotten _a _consent, yes," Michael agreed. "But I wanted this one. And when you are falling all to bits and I am not I think it will be worth the extra effort expended."

Lucifer merely shrugged. "So what did you have in mind? Surely you have some sort of plan."

"I have several," Michael replied. "None of them seem to be working. I think that this may be something we will need to meet to discuss more than once."

"You're full of winning ideas today, aren't you?" Lucifer asked sourly. "Now we need to meet to discuss how to best move forward on killing each other on a regular basis?"

Lucifer was going to insist on being difficult and refer to their unpleasant and painful destiny flippantly as trying to kill each other, wasn't he? Michael wished he could say that he was surprised.

"That or postpone it indefinitely until the Winchesters decide to accept their destiny. For Sam, especially, there is no reason to agree save his respect for destiny and I do not believe either one of them possesses much of that," Michael said.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes. "Why Sam especially? Do you really think Dean has more of a reason to want to help you kill his precious little brother? I've heard that some brothers are against that sort of thing."

Michael reminded himself not to rise to Lucifer's bait. He was better than that. "Sam aiding you, while destined, is evil. You are evil."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Oh, spare me."

"He knows very well that you will only try to destroy the world and kill his brother when he says yes. Consequently, I believe you will have the harder sell."

"You're not talking to your vessel," Lucifer said. "Let's not pretend that our battle won't end with half the population being destroyed, easily, even if you win and poor Sammy will die."

"That might be a good time to mention my promise to their father to bring Sam back," Michael mused. "But regardless, losing half the population – though Dean will not be happy about it – is better for him than losing it all which is what your victory will mean. And once Sam says yes, Dean will have little choice but to accept his own destiny."

"So let me get this straight," Lucifer said, stretching his legs out under the table. "Dean needs to say yes first because his presence is giving Sam the strength to resist. But Sam needs to say yes first because Dean will not accept the inevitability of the apocalypse until I'm possessing Sam."

"This is why I reached out to you," Michael said. "Although we may have some room to work if Dean believes that Sam will not be able to keep saying no, even if he has not actually given in yet. Or if Sam realizes that Dean does not believe in him. Either way, it's complicated."

"And so the two of us are going to become a team to ensure that we can eventually go back to fighting each other like we're supposed to."

Michael sighed. "Honestly, Lucifer, you sound like Raphael."

"Father forbid."

"You said you agreed. Are you taking that back?"

Lucifer shook his head. "I'm not, no. But I hadn't expected us to need to keep meeting."

"If this were going to be easy then we wouldn't need each other."

Lucifer sighed, conceding the point. "Well what do you suggest, then? It's not like I can just come visit you in heaven."

Michael rather doubted that Lucifer would, even if it weren't impossible. To return to a place where he was once loved and then cast out? Even though he had been greatly mourned, it had been necessary and Lucifer wouldn't know that anyway. Pride had always been Lucifer's failing. It was rare to find an angel who held humanity particularly dear but only Lucifer had been unable to just bow before them as Father had wished.

Only Lucifer.

How could any of it have been worth it?

"I will not venture into hell."

Lucifer snorted. "Not again, you mean. I heard all about your little foray into my domain to free your vessel's soul."

"Once was enough," Michael said. "It was more than enough."

Lucifer gave him an exaggerated pout. "You don't like hell? It's almost as though it's a terrible place an angel wouldn't like to go!"

Michael stared back unflinchingly. "You made your choice, Lucifer, and you knew there would be consequences."

"Answer me truthfully, brother, were any of us _really _expecting that?"

No. How could he have? How could any of them have? But it was merciful, in its own way. It wasn't the death that soon awaited him.

"Hell for you is not the same as it is for any other being," he said instead. "None can harm you there. The horrors it visits upon its inhabitants are something you only need witness and if you do not wish to see it you do not have to. There does not even need to be any pain or suffering there if it displeases you. Hell is _yours_."

"Let's not get all sentimental," Lucifer said, rolling his eyes. "So if not heaven or hell, where?"

Michael glanced around.

Lucifer laughed. "Here? Really, Michael? A coffee shop?"

"Earth does seem to be the neutral meeting point. It is where we will fight when the time comes and it is where our vessels live. We could meet anywhere on this world but I must confess to having no preference and no desire to waste time deciding where to go. Do you have any better options?"

Lucifer leaned back in his chair, looking terribly put-upon. "I suppose not."

"Then it is decided," Michael said. "I do have a few ideas for how to best persuade them but I would be glad to hear any suggestions from you."

"Why don't you go first?"

"First I suggest that we try the direct approach," Michael began.

"What, just telling Sam and Dean that we need them to be our vessels because only then will we destroy their world?" Lucifer scoffed. "That has worked out so well so far."

"Understandably they are…reluctant," Michael admitted. "Which is why it really needs to be pressed upon them that their destiny cannot be averted. Once they understand that this is going to happen, they will stop this foolishness and quit wasting time."

"Or they could just dig their heels in," Lucifer argued. "They're both stubborn and could easily take the 'the world is ending but every day I say no is another day that people get to live' approach."

That didn't make a lot of sense.

"What's one day?"

"Nothing, really, but you know how humans get."

"Perhaps," Michael said. "But I have only even spoken to Dean once and surely persuasion takes more effort than that."

"Maybe for _you_," Lucifer muttered.

Michael glared at him. "I'm sorry, did you just not try at all then?"

"Not properly," Lucifer said, annoyance flashing across his face too fast for a human to be able to pick up on. "I introduced myself and informed him of the inevitability of his destiny. Aside from that, I have been waiting for him to continue failing to stop this and to witness the rising death toll and come to understand that this is happening. I will not run begging to a human."

Michael nodded almost unconsciously. "Zachariah has been tasked with bringing Dean around but my vessel proves stubborn."

Lucifer laughed at that.

"What?" Michael demanded, narrowing his eyes. "Your vessel isn't even saying no of his own accord; he's letting my vessel do it for him!"

"Oh, it's not that," Lucifer said. "Though I think removing Dean's influence from Sam will prove easier than changing Dean's mind. Sam accepts me and Dean might come tumbling down as well."

It was one thing to work with Lucifer but Michael didn't want any of his crumbs.

"Zachariah is a hammer," Lucifer said. "He is very good at applying force but he wouldn't even know how to begin without that. And it can get results, I'll not argue that, but that's not really the right track to take with our boys."

Michael said nothing. It had never really fallen to him to convince anyone. The angels, for the most part, knew he was right. It was good to obey their father and they all knew that Michael was continuing to do what their father wanted. There had been dissent but, aside from the disaster with Lucifer, Zachariah or Naomi could bring them in line.

Well, usually.

Gabriel had gone missing impossibly long ago but trying to reign in a recalcitrant archangel had led to this mess and so long as Gabriel was keeping out of the way he could ignore it. Anna had somehow escaped and had a worryingly perceptive plan to halt the apocalypse by preventing Sam and Dean from ever having been born, thus preventing Lucifer from ever having been freed. If he hadn't been so alarmed and unwilling to give her the chance to escape again and succeed she could have been handled. And then there was Castiel but his grace was failing him and he could only do so much. He might have put more effort in bringing Castiel in line if one trip to Naomi hadn't proven rather quickly ineffective and their father hadn't made it clear that Castiel was worth preserving.

Lucifer had never done anything _but _persuade. He had almost persuaded Michael, once, though that was something Michael would never tell him. He had to be the good son no matter what it cost.

"Regardless, I believe the two of us should show up together and try and explain the situation to them and why they should say yes," Michael said.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Do you seriously expect that to work?"

"Not at first, no," Michael said. "Though I would not complain if it did. We just need to keep working at them. I suggest we also try speaking with our vessels in private and perhaps seeing if we can make any headway with the other's vessel. Even if we don't, it should give us a better insight into the other Winchester so as to help us come up with a plan."

Lucifer looked distinctly unimpressed. "I can see why you called me in."

"What?"

"Your ideas seem to be all along the lines of 'just keep talking to them until they agree'," Lucifer said. "I know you can be annoying, Michael, but I really don't think they're going to give in just to shut you up."

Michel frowned. "And just what would you suggest?"

Lucifer shrugged. "Oh, I don't know. Separate the two so Dean has to constantly doubt Sam's continued resistance and Sam's more vulnerable. Take them back to that alternate reality I heard Zachariah sent Dean to where Sam says yes and Dean doesn't to remind Dean that he really doesn't want to make you give up on our fight while Sam is faced with more evidence that he can't escape this. Maybe wait until they're having a really bad day and then show them the paradise this world will become if you win. Sam rooting for you while saying yes wouldn't bother me. Trap them in a room until they slowly go crazy and agree to anything to get out. Maybe erase their memories of angels."

"Why would I want to erase their memories of us?" Michael asked. He knew better than to try asking just how Lucifer had found out about one of Zachariah's attempts to persuade Dean. Chances were, Lucifer only even brought it up to make him wonder and he would not give his brother the satisfaction. "That won't convince them."

"Well, no," Lucifer conceded, "but it would at least give us a nice clean slate if they are too anti-angel at this point to consider becoming our vessels. Not that any of that is in any way my fault, but I have to deal with your mess there, too."

"How is that my fault and not yours?" Michael demanded. "You're the _devil_, Lucifer. We didn't interfere in their lives at all until Dean went to hell, that was all your people. Losing the mother, the obsessive hunting from the father, the death of the father, the corruption and death of Sam, Dean dragged to hell, Ruby and the demon blood…all of that was in the service of freeing you."

"Well, yes," Lucifer agreed amiably. "But that was hell and you kind of have to expect that sort of thing. I knew I'd have my work cut out for me with Sam. But angels who aren't me tend to have a much better reputation and they hate you, too. I wonder why that is."

"They don't approve of the apocalypse," Michael said. "They believe we shouldn't want it and should have done more to prevent you from being freed."

Lucifer laughed. "Done more? How about actually stopped it? We both know you could have. Even just allowing Dean to find Sam sooner or letting them know what the true final seal was would have done it, much less not allowing demons to break seals."

"You do realize that if we had you'd still be in hell, don't you?" Michael asked pointedly.

Lucifer nodded. "Of course I do. But there's a reason that they hate you. If we find ourselves absolutely unable to persuade them, perhaps making them forget would help. And it would separate them from Castiel, as well, who they would have no reason to trust over us."

"Over _me_."

"I am so maligned by those humans," Lucifer complained.

"Is it really being maligned if you view them as abominations who need to be wiped off the face of the Earth?" Michael asked.

"Yes."

"That might be an answer," Michael agreed reluctantly. "I do not like the thought of undoing all of our work but if there is truly no other way then it would give us another chance."

"There's not much progress to undo," Lucifer said. "And maybe this time you could _not _mention the fact that you're not the heroes they expect and want the apocalypse as much as I do."

He just kept saying that.

"I don't _want _the apocalypse, Lucifer," Michael said tiredly.

"Then I hate to tell you but you are _really _bad at this," Lucifer said bluntly.

"All I want is to obey Father and He is the one who wants me to stop you," Michael insisted. "Something that would not be necessary if you weren't such a monster."

Lucifer groaned. "Oh, spare me the noble purpose spiel. I've heard it before, Michael."

Michael pursed his lips but let it go. Somewhere, deep within himself, Lucifer probably already knew exactly what he was. And if he didn't it wasn't as though Michael really expected to be able to reach him.

That door had been closed a long time ago.


	2. Chapter 2

"We have a problem," Castiel said as he popped into the room.

"No, we have about a million problems," Dean disagreed. "But, please, feel free to add to the pile."

Castiel nodded. "Very well."

He'd spent more than a year hanging out with them, on and off, and yet it was still as if he'd never met a human before. Sometimes it was hard to believe that he'd actually gotten a lot better than he used to be. At least he was no longer smiling as he casually pulled daggers from his chest and dropped them before continuing with the conversation as if nothing had happened. That, more than anything, had freaked him out during that first meeting. Well, first meeting that he could remember anyway. Castiel did love reminding everyone about their little meet cute in hell. Under the circumstances, it seemed a bit ungrateful to complain.

"Michael and Lucifer have joined forces."

"Wait, what?" Sam asked, half-rising from his chair. "Is that…that could either be a very good thing or a very bad thing."

"Cas _just _said it was a problem, Sam. Why would that be a good thing, anyway?"

Sam sat back down. "Well, it could go one of two ways, right? If they are joining forces either Michael joined Lucifer, which is bad, or Lucifer joined Michael. And in that case, boom, apocalypse over."

"I'm sorry, Sam, but Lucifer has not been redeemed," Castiel said.

"And those asshats _all _want the apocalypse, remember?" Dean asked. "So how can they possibly be joining forces? Unless Michael decided to flake out and join Team Hell or something. I mean, I only met the dude once but he seemed a little too daddy issues for that kind of thing."

"Trust me," Sam said, "Lucifer's got some heavy duty daddy issues, too."

Dean made a face. "Yeah, but, I mean, not really the same kind."

"Would you like to continue speculating or just let me tell you?" Castiel asked.

"Well I, for one, would like to keep guessing," Dean said. "The longer it takes me to find out what this new problem is, the longer before it will actually have to be my problem."

"Dean," Castiel said reprovingly.

"Just tell us, Cas," Sam said.

"Michael has decided that it is taking too long to convince Dean to be his vessel so he has allied himself with Lucifer for the purposes of obtaining your consent." Castiel paused. "I have been assured that, despite this, the apocalypse is still on."

"Oh, you have _got _to be kidding me!" Dean burst out. "It's taking too long to get me to help out with all the world destroying? He can't be bothered to wait when he's been planning this for who even knows how long? Screw him. Seriously."

Sam's reaction was a little different. "Michael and Lucifer? Working together? This is…this is not good, Dean."

"I don't know, I feel kind of accomplished that those two have been at each other's throats for pretty much all of forever and then we won't play ball so they have no choice but to team up."

"Sure, maybe, but now they _have _teamed up. We have the two most powerful archangels working together and that probably means Raphael is right there with them and Gabriel is still off not helping in any way," Sam said.

"It's really ridiculous how unhelpful he's being," Dean agreed. "But Sammy, come on, it's not that different than before. I mean, Lucifer was going after you and…all of heaven was after me. It's not any more attention and now they both have to split their focus so it evens out."

"I guess," Sam said but he sounded unconvinced. "Cas, how did this even happen? Why would Lucifer, after all of this, just go along with Michael's plan? Did they really expect us to say yes immediately?"

"I cannot speak for what Lucifer expects," Castiel said. "But I do believe that heaven had expected that Dean would have given in by now. Michael was the one who approached Lucifer, I know, but I do not have all the details. Even if I were still welcome in heaven I do not believe I would have all the details. The archangels are very private beings."

"But you can guess," Dean said. "I mean, I've literally met Michael once and Sam never has. And the only read I got on Lucifer was that he was a psychopathic manchild with all of the daddy issues."

"Michael and Lucifer were very close before the fall," Castiel said haltingly. "I am sure they missed each other, despite everything. Perhaps they wanted an excuse to reunite before they have to kill each other. There is a reason everyone is wondering if this means the apocalypse will not proceed."

"I swear, every new thing I learn about them just makes me more convinced this whole 'apocalypse' thing is just the angels unable to deal with their family crap without hiding behind ideals and taking it out on the planet," Dean said disgustedly.

Sam nodded. "But then, we're hardly the poster children for healthy family fights, Dean. I mean, come on. Dad says 'if you walk out that door, don't come back' and I literally never do? He never calls me? You don't stop by to see me. We had a fight about finding Dad that lasted like five minutes before I took off. And let's not even get started on the whole Ruby thing."

"Well, yeah," Dean admitted. "But at least we've never tried to destroy the world!"

"That's rather a low bar," Castiel said.

Dean glared at him. "_And _we try not to involve other people, unlike them sucking the whole damn world in."

"It's just really weird, you know?" Sam asked. "These two miss each other, and I get that, but they won't admit it. Instead they decide to team up so that they can go kill each other faster. If they miss each other they probably don't even want to kill each other. Lucifer said he didn't, at any rate, but you can't really take him at what he says."

"Michael said the same thing," Dean said. "But I still feel that if he wants to obey Daddy more than he wants to not kill Lucifer then he clearly wants to kill Lucifer."

"Can't somebody just sign those two up for therapy?" Sam demanded.

"I do not think it would do any good," Castiel said. "They would not go. Or if they did, there is nobody but God Himself who would be strong enough to not be killed by one of them in a burst of rage. Michael usually has more restraint but I would not risk it."

"So what do we do?" Dean asked. "I don't exactly want to just sit around waiting to have two archangels on our asses trying to get us to help them not deal with their crap."

"I do not know that there is anything we can do," Castiel said. "You are hidden from their sight but that will only slow them down. Lucifer has not needed to physically find you in order to plague your dreams, Sam, and angels have managed to find you before."

Dean blew out a frustrated breath. "Perfect. So we have to just sit tight waiting for more of this crap."

"I don't believe it's that different from what you were doing before," Castiel said. "Just now you know that it is both of them."

"It could be worse," Sam said. "At least we've still got those angel banishing sigils."

"Yeah," Dean said. "But I don't know about you but this apocalypse is really starting to get on my last nerve."

* * *

Sam was trying not to get his throat torn out by two snarling werewolves. He and Dean had gotten separated but he didn't have the time or energy to worry about that just then.

He had to not get himself killed. He had to not get himself bitten.

"I am not accustomed to being ignored, Sam," Lucifer said.

Startled, Sam lost his focus and one of the werewolves managed to get ahold of his arm.

He didn't have time to worry about that.

"I mean, it's just incredibly rude," Lucifer complained. "I would never ignore you, Sam."

"I wish you would!"

"Ah, ah, ah. I am a big believer in the golden rule. I will not be ignored so I do not ignore. It's basic manners."

Sam kicked one of the werewolves away from him. It was absurd. There was an archangel not five feet from him and he was likely going to be ripped apart. He knew better than to ask Satan for a hand, though. It was better not to owe him anything anyway.

"How is the apocalypse following the golden rule?" he demanded. "People don't _want _to be murdered."

"Maybe," Lucifer replied. "But the golden rule isn't about what _they _want. It's about what _I_ want. And while I don't want to be murdered now, if I were a human I wouldn't need someone else to put me out of my misery."

"Sammy!" Dean shouted. Sam turned his head and caught a brief glimpse of his brother running into the room. "Fix this!"

Was he talking to Lucifer? Why would he-the wolves were gone.

"Damn," Dean swore, coming over to him. "Is that a bite?"

Sam nodded reluctantly. "Yeah. Sorry. I got distracted."

Lucifer sighed and lazily waved a hand in Sam's direction. "I will accept having a human vessel if I must but I will not have a werewolf for a vessel. It's called standards."

"This is a good step," another voice said. It sounded just like…"But I do question why you were in here and _I _needed to get rid of the werewolves. Were you there when he got bitten?"

Sam turned to the voice. But that was impossible. Or, given the fact that he and Dean had both returned to life (some of them more than others), highly unlikely. How would he be here? How would he be able to get rid of werewolves? Why would he be casually admonishing Lucifer like that?

"I was," Lucifer said, nodding. "I did not see a reason to interfere."

"I just bet you didn't," Dean grumbled.

"You're not going to win Sam over if you don't step in to save him from werewolves when you're literally in the same room," the man lectured.

"Don't give me advice on winning over vessels when you haven't gotten the yes, either," Lucifer snapped.

The man turned to Dean. "Keeping in mind that answering me is not indicative of consenting, would you be more likely to agree to be my vessel or my brother's?"

"I guess if I had to choose, and I _don't_, I'd go with the guy who is more completely indifferent to the destruction of the human race rather than the one who is outright gunning for it."

The man looked smug. "See?"

"Oh, that's not even fair," Lucifer complained. "You know about my reputation!"

"You earned that reputation, Lucifer."

"So, what, I should intervene to save him from werewolves? If it were vampires or demons could I leave him to it?"

"I sincerely hope that's not a real question."

"Well it's not a fake question," Lucifer said. "It was a proper sentence that invited an answer and everything."

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed. "What's going on here? Why's dad here?"

"I am not your father," the man who apparently wasn't his father said.

"Michael apparently decided he needed a vessel and he somehow tricked Dad into saying yes," Dean explained. "He might be watching us now. But if Jimmy Novak was any indication, he might be too busy being chained to a comet to see us. Or, hell, I saw what happened to Raphael's vessel and according to Cas being Michael's vessel is an even worse job."

Sam looked closer. It looked like his father but the movements were all wrong. It was like he had a twin or something, someone stiff and straight-backed. He didn't like it.

"It doesn't have to be," Michael defended himself. "Your father is fine."

"And boy, did he call their reaction," Lucifer said, amused.

"How did you get in him?" Sam asked. "Is it like a holdover from that time in the 70s or something?"

"I needed his consent again," Michael said.

"Dad would never say yes to you!" Dean shouted.

"Except, of course, that time he apparently did thirty years ago," Lucifer said.

"That was different," Dean said. "Crazy angels were going to kill Mom."

"Your father knew I would not be using his body to fight Lucifer so consenting would not contribute to the apocalypse," Michael said. "He had a list of demands. Among them are him and his wife returning to life and Sam being brought back after I kill my brother."

"If I win, I don't feel the need to keep any of Michael's promises," Lucifer said. "Though I would be open to negotiating with you, Sam."

"How do I even know you'd keep your promises?" Dean demanded.

"Angels are very trustworthy," Lucifer told him.

Michael glared at him. "Stop it."

"Stop what?" Lucifer asked innocently. "I'm helping."

"You're really not."

"It is very important to me to do this right," Michael said. "It is an unpleasant task but one that must be faced. That is why I'm being so open about my intentions to you."

Dean barked out a laugh. "Open about your intentions? Your goons didn't even let me know that you existed until Cas dragged me out of hell and then you wouldn't tell me about the apocalypse. We had to figure it out! And even then you made out like you were trying to stop it when you were outright working with demons to make sure it happened! And let's not even get started on you only telling me I was supposed to be your vessel when Zachariah was supposed to not let me go until I consented!"

"He does have a point there," Lucifer said, smirking and moving one finger to his lips.

"I never worked with demons nor did any of the loyal angels under my command," Michael protested. "Some were secretly in league with Lucifer, such as Uriel, but I did not condone any of their actions."

"You really should have better control over your underlings," Lucifer said. "I'd never be so sloppy."

Michael glared at him. "Crowley."

"Yes, he is proving rather elusive," Lucifer admitted reluctantly. "But at least I know what he's up to and he fled the moment he gave the ineffectual Colt over. And now I have that. I've been enjoying shooting people with it."

Michel sighed and turned to Dean. "There was no need to inform you of the existence of angels until after the seals were breaking. It would have changed nothing. While I cannot deny that I had been anticipating the settling of my dispute with Lucifer and I believe it is destiny, angels were fighting to stop his rising."

"Six of them even died in the field one week," Lucifer said mockingly. "Which I, for one, would love to hear more about given how powerless most demons are against us."

"Perhaps I should have come to you sooner," Michael admitted. "But, as an archangel, finding a suitable vessel is not easy."

"It took me less than an hour after I located Nick to persuade him," Lucifer said. "And I didn't even promise him anything but what I was already going to do. Though I might have not mentioned the apocalypse bit. And finding him only took a few hours. By myself. After I was sealed away for thousands of years and needed to reacquaint myself. Your excuse is pathetic."

"I elected to delegate and let Zachariah inform you of what you needed to know," Michael said. "Had he been more successful, we wouldn't have had to meet at all until you said yes."

"Yeah, well, Zachariah's an asshat," Dean said bluntly.

Sam couldn't argue with him there.

"Since that approach is not working, I am here now to do this in person."

"It is still not going to work, especially with you wearing my dad," Dean snapped.

"I could revive Adam and try for his consent," Michael said. "Henry is currently unavailable but I could go back further and find another willing vessel."

Dean glared. "Leave Adam out of it. He died horribly and doesn't need to be dragged into this."

"So would you prefer I find a great-grandfather or something of the like?" Michael asked. "I'm not looking to make this any harder than it has to be."

"Leave my family alone!"

"I apologize, Dean, but you know I can't do that," Michael said earnestly.

Sam snorted. "Maybe you choose not to. I can't imagine there are many out there who can make you do anything."

Michael inclined his head. "Very well, then. It is my duty. But I already have your father's consent so if you cease your objections to my vessel I can leave your other relatives in peace."

Dean made a face. "It's just…weird. He's my _dad_."

"You were not nearly this disturbed the last time," Michael pointed out.

"Yeah, well, last time Sam was dead and you just killed Anna to save Mom and Dad looked quite a bit different," Dean said.

Michael looked thoughtful then nodded. The familiar form of Sam's father melted away into the less-familiar face they had met when they travelled back in time.

"Is this better?"

Dean looked like he had sucked on a lemon. "I can live with it."

"Sam, you must be feeling so left out," Lucifer said, disappearing and reappearing at his side.

Sam quickly took a few steps back. "Not really."

"So quick to deny his own feelings!" Lucifer exclaimed.

"I'm really not. I just don't want to talk to you about this," Sam said.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow. "Oh, would you prefer we make small talk first? I can do that. Did you know that there are still people out there blaming me for, well, all sorts of things? Hardly fair given I only got out pretty recently and I've been too busy killing people to make other bad things happen to them. And even if you want to blame everything my demons have done on me since I created them, they're hardly causing mental illness either." He paused. "Well, PTSD, perhaps. But those cases usually end in death more than lingering trauma and that's really not what people mean."

"I don't want to talk to you about _anything_," Sam clarified, glaring at him.

"Now that's just hurtful," Lucifer said. "What's wrong with a little conversation? Words never hurt anybody."

"I…don't even have the words for how much crap that is," Sam said.

"Yeah, aren't you trying to use words to talk Sammy into being your meat suit anyway?"

"Please, Dean," Lucifer scoffed. "Meat suit is such a _demon _term. You're better than that."

Dean blinked and drew back. "Satan believes in me. I…don't know how to take that."

"I would be concerned," Michael opined.

Dean shook his head. "I don't want to agree with you but I kind of do agree with you."

"It won't be my words that will sway you," Lucifer said. "Just the sheer inevitability of what's going to happen."

Sam glared again. "Then why are you even here?"

"There's nothing that says I have to stay away and keep radio silent while you're realizing this," Lucifer said. "In fact, my words could even help you through this difficult time."

"So now you're acknowledging that me being your vessel would really suck for me?" Sam asked, crossing his arms.

Lucifer shrugged. "Perhaps. Losing your species seems to be something you're against and, honestly, I could never take being a vessel. That's why it's rather lucky I won't have to. So you will probably be in a very low place when you consent. That's not my fault. I don't make the rules."

Sam laughed harshly. "Not your fault? Everything in my life that has ever gone wrong has been because of you!"

Lucifer gave a long-suffering sigh and glanced heavenward. "Does nobody listen when I remind them that I have been stuck in hell for thousands of years? How people blame their problems on me is just beyond me."

"Sam's not just some soccer mom blaming you for her kid blasting rap or something," Dean argued. "All of my problems are your fault, too. Azazel got him started on the demon blood when he was six freaking months old and killed our mom!"

"I seem to recall hearing something about how he wouldn't have killed her if she hadn't come across him," Lucifer said, tapping his chin.

"Yeah, and that's crap, too," Sam said. "We were still pretty out of the loop when Dean finally killed him but I'm pretty sure he was the king of hell. You're seriously telling me that he had no way to keep her from interfering? Or, once she did interrupt, he couldn't have knocked her out or made her think it was a dream or something like that?"

"He probably could have," Lucifer said. "But if he chose not to, because he was a demon remember, that hardly makes it my fault."

"He wouldn't have been there in the first place if he hadn't been trying to free you!" Sam shouted. "And what about all those other families he destroyed and those innocents he killed because he wasn't sure it was really me?"

"Only tainting you was necessary to free me so anything else he did was not because of me," Lucifer reasoned. "Maybe he wouldn't have been there in the first place without me but at some point you need to let other people take responsibility for their own actions. And I was actively trying to get freed so don't you think that if I had a way to know precisely the name of my perfect vessel I would have given it to him? I had been sealed away for a long time and though I knew it the moment I saw you, that didn't exactly help me give precise instructions to my underlings."

"I have a question," Michael said.

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Can't this wait? I'm trying to talk to Sam right now."

"It could," Michael said. "But I don't feel I should have to wait."

"Fine, what is it?"

"Why did Azazel even need to make deals with the parents of your potential vessels to enter their homes ten years later, assuming they would even have a six-month child by then, instead of just entering and tainting them?" Michael asked. "Perhaps Mary Winchester took care to demon-proof her house but the others would not know how to."

"That's…actually a really good question," Dean said slowly, staring accusingly at Lucifer.

Lucifer merely shrugged. "I was a little busy being trapped in hell at the time and Azazel only spoke to me once in all my years trapped there. Communication required slaughtering quite a few nuns in a sacred space, after all. Who can say why he did it that way? Perhaps he just had a flair for the dramatic. He was a demon, after all."

"He probably did it because he knew that Mary Winchester would never allow her children to be raised to be hunters," Michael disagreed. "Given Mary and John's families and Dean's own words to Azazel the night he made the deal with Mary, it's no surprise Sam was the one he was betting on. But Sam needed to not be a nice little civilian boy if he was going to be the last special child standing and then kill Lilith to start the apocalypse. And, though Azazel may not have known or cared, Dean would be called upon to stand against the apocalypse before becoming my vessel."

That actually made a lot of sense to Sam. What would have happened if their father had died instead of their mother? His mother had already known what was out there and took the brutal deaths of her parents at a demon's hand and stayed true to her plan for a normal life. Losing her husband probably would have made her all the more determined. Maybe she'd have taught them to protect themselves but they wouldn't have been hunters.

He couldn't imagine it.

"And I would be the only one called to stand against the apocalypse because God knows no one else was," Dean said. "Well, okay, fine. Cas was. But apparently that got him fired from heaven or something."

"I did offer him my condolences," Lucifer said. "It's such a sad thing to happen."

"Nobody asked you," Dean said.

"I don't know if I should be impressed or worried at how easily you slip into the mindset of a king of hell, Michael, whether you happen to be right or not," Lucifer said.

Michael just shot him a look.

"And before you boys continue on with your litany of woe, your father made the choice to become a hunter because of something Azazel did. Everything that happened after that was because of that choice. Dean made the choice not to leave when he was old enough and you, Sam, made the choice to come back before anything had even happened to your father. He's the one who chose not to call. And everything afterwards that Azazel did…much of it was necessary to free me but it was hardly my fault Azazel chose to do what he did and is really fair to resent me for just wanting my freedom?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "Even if I came out of that cage determined to love humanity or something like that, blood was still needed to set me free and that was God's doing. And Michael's, for sealing me in there."

"I'm not having this conversation with you right now."

"I didn't ask you to," Lucifer said. "All I want is for people to start taking responsibility for their own actions instead of just blaming me."

"He says while simultaneously passing the buck on all of his own actions," Dean said disgustedly.

"You know, for one of the four most powerful beings in all creation you sure can make yourself seem like a victim," Sam said, shaking his head.

"Oh, you've realized that there are only four of us?" Lucifer asked, delighted. "Well done! You have no idea how amused I was to find out that people thought Uriel or Anael were one of us. Have you met Raphael and Gabriel?"

The trickster's face flashed through his mind. They hadn't seen him since they left him standing in the pseudo-rain after forcing him to confess to who he really was and his true motives for supporting the apocalypse. Sam hadn't argued when Dean decided to free him. It didn't sit right with him leaving Gabriel trapped there forever and the fact they were inside and safe from the weather meant it would take even longer for him to get free. But he had worried, just the same.

Gabriel hadn't come after them for getting the best of him in the past. He had even seemed impressed by it. But had they really gotten the best of him? He hadn't seemed to expect that he and Dean had staged that fight and he and Bobby were Dean's back-up that first time. But Gabriel had faked his death easily enough and faking his death was the plan he tried to get Dean to agree to. Sam eventually realized a trickster was behind those endless Tuesdays but how long had that taken? And Gabriel had to have made that error on purpose plus he was in no real danger. And while Sam had seen through Gabriel's trickster disguise, Gabriel had left 'Bobby's' body there long enough for him to panic and think he really did kill his surrogate father. Sam had gotten his way then by apparently being too stupid and stubborn for Gabriel to think he could still convince or by looking too pathetic he hadn't had the heart to continue.

They had decisively won after the TV land. They told Gabriel they were going to do what he wanted and consent to Michael and Lucifer and how would that have even played out with Gabriel hiding? Castiel clearly knew who Gabriel was the moment he saw him, hence the duct tape, so of course Michael and Lucifer would have, too. Was he going to just snap them there and stay away? Admit who he was and drop them off as presents before running away again? Did Gabriel even think that through?

But anyway. They had told Gabriel they were giving him what he wanted then they had tricked him, actually tricked him, and trapped him in holy fire. They had forced him to bring back Castiel and threatened to kill him. They could have, too, just by dialing up the heat a bit. They got his real name from him increasing the chances that the angels constantly plaguing them would find out who he really was. And Gabriel gave a good speech, even if Dean shot it down, and his cocky attitude didn't fail until they started to walk away. Then he conceded they had him at their mercy and Dean let him go.

Sam was expecting some kind of retribution after that, even if it was just a little, but they hadn't heard anything. Maybe it wasn't worth it to mess with them while the eyes of heaven and hell were both on them and he wasn't trying to speed things along.

"I met Raphael," Dean said boldly. "I wasn't impressed. He did a cool little light-show but ask how easy it was to trap him in some holy fire and ditch him there."

That was not quite how Dean had described the encounter when they had finally reunited but it was a pretty badass moment.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow at Michael. "You let that happen?"

"I didn't know about it," Michael said defensively. "Raphael managed to free himself after a few days. He is holding a grudge about that, by the way."

"That's fine," Dean said easily. "I'm holding a grudge about the way that he blew up Cas."

"I don't see why," Lucifer said. "He got better. In fact, given the very few possibilities for how that could have happened and the fact that everyone knows that you could say my brother did him a favor."

"Raphael thinks you did it."

"Well I didn't."

"You're not a trustworthy source," Michael pointed out.

"So now you believe that I brought Castiel back?" Lucifer asked.

"Well, no," Michael conceded. "But you supporting that story is not going to persuade anyone."

"I try to help but no one lets me because of my reputation," Lucifer said sadly. "And before you remind me, yet again, that I earned it, how am I supposed to change it if everyone is so suspicious?"

"That could be a legitimate problem if you had any true interest in changing your reputation," Michael said.

"The thing you need to understand, Sam, is that technically having you as my vessel isn't _required_," Lucifer said.

"Then leave me alone."

"I have been leaving you alone for the most part," Lucifer said. "Believe me, if I wanted to nothing could stop me from spending all my time with you. Even your little angel banishing sigils have to be written in blood and only work for so long. And if I show up unexpectedly and don't give you or your brother the opportunity to create them…it wouldn't be hard, especially if you managed to banish me a few times and I can learn from my mistakes."

The very idea of Lucifer as his own personal stalker made Sam shudder.

"But it's not as though I do that even though I could," Lucifer said. "I'm not unreasonable, Sam. And if you did defy every expectation and continue saying no forever, it wouldn't change a great deal. I'll be honest, it would ruin the apocalypse a little for me in that I would have to make do with this less than ideal vessel or one just like it instead of my proper one. It would be even worse if Michael gets the yes and I don't but don't let something like that influence you!"

"I have no intention of letting things like your brother showing you up or you not fully enjoying wiping out my entire species persuade me to say yes," Sam said flatly.

Lucifer nodded. "Right, of course. But I'd still kill them. It's not as though it is Sam Winchester or bust. I am already moving forward with my plans, giving you some space, and killing thousands. You say no long enough and I'll kill Michael like this."

"You will try like that," Michael corrected. "You do not have the power to kill me."

"Let's not argue in front of the children, Michael. In the end, Sam, you save nothing by resisting me," Lucifer said.

"Sure I do," Sam said. "That's the same kind of argument that doesn't hold water when people say that if they hadn't gone along with the crimes everyone else was doing it would have been done anyway. There's a thing called moral culpability and if I don't say yes I don't have to help you destroy the world."

"But you get nothing out of it, either," Lucifer said. "And honestly, these doomed moral stands are so banal. If you say yes, you can ask for a great deal. You will live through this, assuming I win, and I can bring your brother back. I can make the same deal Michael made with your father, you know, and it's smart to play both sides. If I lose then it doesn't matter as what bits of humanity survive my battle with Michael will be safe and you will be brought back. But if I win…it won't save Dean. Even if he never says yes, I might kill him anyway. I might kill you. Or you'll have to live in a world where I win. You could get a lot out of a yes, Sam, if you're clever and I know that you are."

"He's not interested," Dean said flatly.

"I'm not selfish enough to doom the world so I get a better deal," Sam agreed. He hoped Dean hadn't spoken first because he worried that Sam might be tempted.

"You were listening when I explained how it's happening anyway?" Lucifer asked.

"Sure but it's not happening today or for however long you try to convince me," Sam pointed out. "And if I say yes and Dean says yes you two would fight right here and now."

"Very shortly, yes, but this is hardly a suitable location and there's no need to rush it," Michael corrected him.

"And if we say yes we won't be able to stop you," Sam said.

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Sam, it's adorable that you'd even try but you have to know, in your heart, that you can't stop me. I won't fall for any holy oil like Raphael did. You'll never get close enough to stab me with an angel blade. You just…can't. And if you really think a few more months of semi-normal life is worth suffering the same fate as all the rest of humanity, I guess we'll just have to see if you still feel that way as things build up to my fight with Michael."

"Then leave me alone until then."

"I could," Lucifer said. "In fact, I was doing just that."

"But now you can't because your brother you don't want to kill and who doesn't want to kill you but who you're going to have a death match with over the fate of a planet neither of you actually care about wants to work together with you?" Sam asked skeptically. "So you can move up the timetable on that death match."

Lucifer smirked. "When you say it like that it almost sounds ridiculous."

"Why did you even come here?" Dean demanded. "You had to have known it wouldn't be that easy to get us to say yes."

"Perhaps not," Michael acknowledged. "But we had to start somewhere. It wasn't that easy for Castiel to win your trust, either, but that didn't mean he never should have even met you or should have stayed away after explaining he was an angel."

"I think they've more than realized where we stand," Lucifer said. "We could stay and belabor the point or we could agree to just see you next time."

"See you next time?" Dean asked, making a face. "That sounds like you have an appointment or something."

"Don't I?"

"Wait," Sam said suddenly.

Dean stared at him. "Seriously? They're leaving and you want to stop them?"

"I just had a question," Sam said.

"Go ahead," Michael said.

"You said something about how Azazel probably chose me because of my mom and dad's family," Sam said. "I get the thing about Mom, she was a hunter. But what does my dad's family have to do with it?"

Dean looked suddenly interested. "Yeah, that's a good point. Or do you just mean the bloodline? Because it has to be my dad's bloodline if he can get possessed and Adam can, too. But if Azazel knew that then why wouldn't he know it was Sam? Unless everyone had the same bloodline? I mean, unless everyone regularly got wiped out or only had one kid per generation you'd think by now a bloodline would be pretty huge, right?"

"Actually, your father's family had the bloodline that Michael needed which is why he can possess your father and half-brother," Lucifer corrected. "Your mother's family has the bloodline I need. If I could convince her, I might show up looking like your mother. You never know."

"Please don't," Sam said, horrified.

Lucifer just waggled his eyebrows.

"Are you seriously telling me that your two bloodlines just happened to unite with my parents and my dad didn't have a clue about the supernatural stuff?" Dean asked suspiciously. "And the bloodline united right in time to have the two kids you clowns needed as vessels?"

"That certainly is an interesting coincidence, don't you think, Michael?" Lucifer asked, smiling.

"Your parents were brought together by a cupid, Dean," Michael admitted.

Dean's eye twitched. "What? What happened to 'there's no free will, Dean, because of all the ways life could have played out, including your parents getting together and having you, it happened to play out just like it did'?"

Lucifer's smile widened. "Did you really say that? Uh-oh."

"They really did love each other," Michael defended himself. "That's what cupids do. They create love. But your parents still had to have been born and be the appropriate gender and want kids and agree to settle down together. Do you know how many people love each other but, for whatever reason, don't stay together or have children? The fact that heaven ensured they would fall in love and they didn't decide for themselves doesn't take away from my argument against free will."

"No but there's a big difference between 'it was inevitable' and 'my friends and I made it happen'," Dean insisted.

"And no one has answered the question about Dad's family," Sam said. "Was it just the bloodline or not?"

"No, of course not," Michael said. "Your father wouldn't know this as his father fell through a time portal that he hasn't emerged from when your father was young but the Winchesters have long-since been Men of Letters."

"Time portal," Sam repeated. "Is that seriously what we've come to?"

"Men of what now?" Dean asked.

Lucifer sighed. "Honestly, Dean, it's three words. Men of Letters. You really should listen."

"I'm listening just fine," Dean said. "I just have never heard of them."

"That's because the last knight of hell, Abaddon, destroyed them sixty years ago and then entered the portal chasing your grandfather and is also out of commission," Michael explained.

"There are knights of hell?" Sam asked. "How does that even work?"

"I named them that," Lucifer said. "It all sounds very grand. Cain was the first and he trained the others. Of course, he fell in love with some human woman and when the knights tried to get him to come back he killed all of them except Abaddon since his dying love begged him not to. It was all very…unfortunate."

"But what are the Men of Letters?" Dean demanded.

"They were sort of like hunters," Michael said slowly. "Though they'd be horrified to be associated with them. They were more scholarly than that and, for the most part, not fighters. They were a secret society and membership usually passed through the generation. They were not witches but they utilized a large collection of magical objects and rituals just the same. They had the most extensive collection of lore I've ever seen. That was probably why Abaddon killed them." He paused. "Well, that or the fact they appeared to be on the verge of finding a way to cure demons. The timing is a little too coincidental for that not to be related."

"C-curing demons?" Sam couldn't believe it. "From what?"

"Curing demons," Lucifer scoffed. "As if restoring their humanity is any better."

"I guess from being a demon," Dean said. "Is there, uh, any way we can get our hands on any of that?"

"If you were willing to consent to me, Dean, we could talk about a great many things," Michael said. "Failing that, I'm sure your grandfather will turn up sooner or later. If it's before the end of this world, you could ask him all about it."

"Now if there's nothing else we can do for you, we'll be taking our leave," Lucifer said, vanishing before waiting to hear a reply.

Michael looked expectantly at them.

"Uh, we're good," Sam said. "Thanks."

Michael vanished.

"Did you seriously just thank an archangel for coming to try and make us vessels?"

"It's called being polite, Dean, and I thanked him for waiting to see if we needed more information," Sam said. "He didn't have to give us any at all. And now we know about the Men of Letters!"

Dean snorted. "Yeah, for all the good that does us. Still, makes you think. Dad hated his father his whole life and now we find out that not only did he not walk out on them but he was some kind of badass librarian who is stuck in time."

"Yeah," Sam said, looking down. "And he never found out."

"Well, he might have been listening to Michael explain it," Dean said. "Or he could have found out while in heaven. Or maybe, if he really comes back, we can tell him about it. He can reunite with him if he ever comes out of that portal."

"Do you remember the good old days when we just had to deal with vengeful spirits?" Sam asked plaintively.

"Why do the good old days never feel like the good old days when you're living them?" Dean wondered. "What do you think about that whole thing?"

"It was…weird. I don't like it but I'm not rethinking my no," Sam said. "You?"

D

"No, definitely not, but I meant more the Dad thing. You think Dad will really come back?"

"I don't know," Sam said slowly. "Maybe Michael will do it to convince you he keeps his promises and try to win you over. It would just…be weird, you know. I never really got used to having him back before he died."

"I got used to him being dead but in some ways it's not that different than him being on a really long hunt," Dean replied. "It's Mom I'm more weirded out by. You don't even remember her and I know it always seems like I had this completely different experience because I'm older but, still. I was four, Sammy. And it's been more than twenty-five years. I barely knew her and it's been so long…do you think it's possible?"

"Possible? Of course it's possible. From what I've seen, there's not a lot they can't do. Will they do it?" Sam asked rhetorically. "Well that's another matter entirely."

Dean groaned. "This is not what I needed."

* * *

"You're upset," Michael noted. "I don't believe the humans noticed."

"Of course not," Lucifer said. "They're humans. They notice nothing."

"Why are you upset? It happened when you were explaining about Cain and Abaddon. Were you…displeased with the death of your knights?"

"I could make more knights," Lucifer said, shaking his head. "And while my knights knew me before I was imprisoned, they're still demons and I'm not all that sentimental."

"Then what is it?"

Lucifer started to answer then stopped himself. "What does it matter, Michael? We're working together but nothing's changed."

Technically, Lucifer was right. He was still the great evil that Michael would need to destroy in order to usher in paradise and, hopefully, bring their father home. Everyone was counting on him. It would not be easy but that did not mean it was not right. And he would do it. He would. But that day had not yet come and why pretend not to care when it was so obvious that he did? Maybe the lesser angels and the demons and humans would be fooled but Lucifer never would.

"Do you think I'll use whatever you tell me against you?" Michael asked. "I intend to conduct our fight with honor."

"No, I just don't see how it could possibly matter."

"If it doesn't matter then why not tell me?"

There was a silence.

"It's just the _way_ it happened. Cain was perfect. He was so well-meaning, damning himself to save his precious little brother. And then he became a ruthless killer, the way all humans can be twisted. Their work was glorious. And then…some human woman. He didn't kill her and, for some reason, took the time to get to know her instead. They fell in love. He stopped. He killed the others. He stopped killing all together, even letting his wife's murderer go, because she begged it of him."

"Doesn't that show that humans are capable of great goodness, too?" Michael asked gently. "Cain may be a demon but he came from humanity and the lack of torture he underwent means he can remember it better."

"Of course they're _capable _of it, Michael, that was never in dispute," Lucifer said impatiently. "It's their flaws, not their merits, that interest me. And Cain isn't just a demon! He bears my mark. It will never let him die, not without the First Blade. It will never stop whispering murder and death into his ear. And he just…_retired_. He can't do that. They say he keeps bees!"

"That must be…difficult."

It was hard for him to sympathize with Lucifer that one of his demons wasn't being evil enough for him but actually telling Lucifer that, when he already hadn't been sure about confiding in him, would not do Michael any favors.

"I just don't understand it," Lucifer complained.

"Maybe he's trying to aspire to be better than he is," Michael offered.

"He shouldn't be able to, no matter what he's aspired to! It's been nearly a century and a half and he hasn't committed a single act of violence despite some very good provocation," Lucifer said. "Though Abaddon's disappearance may have helped with that since it happened."

"Perhaps it's all the time he's had the Mark," Michael suggested. "He's learned to live with it. It's not as though you ever created something like that before and so know about the long-term effects."

"I suppose," Lucifer said, sighing. "I can go track down Cain later."

"What did you think of Sam and Dean?"

"Sam was what I expected," Lucifer said. "He knows he doesn't have a chance and is just putting on a brave front to not disappoint his brother. I think you are right about needing to separate them or make Dean more obviously have no faith in Sam's ability to resist."

"And Dean?"

"He's very brash but lacks conviction. He doesn't want to say yes but he doesn't believe they can stop it. Unfortunately, he might just be stubborn enough to say no anyway. Say no forever, maybe."

"That's why I came to you," Michael said. "We don't want that."

"I don't know, if I get the yes and you I don't I might enjoy that," Lucifer mused. "Though I concede that, just like with Sam, Dean is more likely to say yes once his brother has. What was your impression of the two?"

"Dean…he's a lot like me," Michael said. "Except he will not bow to the inevitable. I am not so delusional as he is. But he's young and I don't think he fully understand why this has to happen. To him, it's just some higher powers playing games with his family and his world. I understand why he resents it. But that doesn't change anything. And Sam is so desperate to make up for the mistakes of the past and so aware that he's never going to be able to change what is coming. It almost hurts to look at him."

"Does it?"

Lucifer didn't ask why and Michael wasn't going to say it.

"How much time do you think we should give them before going to try again?" Michael asked. "We did what we set out to do with this meeting but there were too many of us to have a proper attempt at a persuasion. For the straight-out attempts to talk them into it it should just be one on one, I think."

"I don't know, we'll play it by ear," Lucifer said. "In the meantime, I think we should track down Gabriel."

"Gabriel?" Michael asked, startled.

"You don't need to come with me if you don't want to," Lucifer told him. "But that is what I will be doing and do you really trust me alone with our brother after he's been gone so long? I may actually be able to make it two against two. Wouldn't that be something?"

"Of course I want to find Gabriel," Michael said. "He's been missing for so long. Too long. It's rather alarming at this point and I don't even know what he's doing. But Raphael and I have been looking for him since he left and we never managed to find him. What makes you think you and I can find him now?"

Lucifer smirked at him. "The fact that, when I asked about him, Sam Winchester had seen him recently and knows how he's hiding. He doesn't know exactly where he is but I think I can find an archangel masquerading as a trickster, especially knowing what face he's wearing."

"He won't want to see us," Michael said, cautiously optimistic. Not that that mattered. If Michael could find him then he would find him. Gabriel had been running long enough.

"You don't know that."

"If he wanted to see us then he would instead of hiding like a child."

"He loves us," Lucifer insisted. He closed his eyes and was clearly concentrating. "Even me and I bet he'd actually admit that."

"That's why he wants to stay away," Michael said. "He knows we'd just make him take part in our fight."

"Well he can't just not take part in a conflict that will engulf this entire world," Lucifer said reasonably. "And we don't have to make any decisions about him just yet. We need to find him first and see what has become of him."

They lapsed into silence. If this did work, if Lucifer really could find their missing brother, then wasn't that proof that he was right? Didn't that mean that he was doing the right thing by working with him no matter what else happened or what anybody else thought?

Eventually, after some time, Lucifer opened his eyes. "I've found him."

He took flight and Michael immediately went after him.

They touched down in a cheap restaurant. It was a strange place to be, a strange place to find one archangel let alone three.

Michael hadn't looked in anyone's mind to see what his brother looked like these days but he didn't have to. There were plenty of humans around but, even if he wouldn't have been able to tell the moment he saw Gabriel, there was only one person staring straight at them. He had a large green drink in front of him.

Lucifer opened his mouth.

"No," Gabriel said. He looked over at Michael. "And no."


	3. Chapter 3

"You can't just 'no' us, Gabriel," Lucifer said though, honestly, he was pleased. It looked like he wasn't the only one Gabriel didn't want to deal with.

That had been a bit of a concern and why he had told Michael he was doing this in the first place. He was under no obligation to help Michael find Gabriel if Michael couldn't think to at least see if the vessels knew anything. Even their deal to work together to get consent had nothing to do with this.

But time and time again angels had said no to him. Some had said yes but never the ones he really wanted. If he went alone he wouldn't know if Gabriel was still futilely trying to remain uninvolved or if he had just finally chosen Michael, just like everybody else. If Gabriel had chosen Michael it wouldn't end well for him if Lucifer found him alone. He wondered if Gabriel would appreciate his bringing Michael as a safeguard or annoyed that his death had been a potential outcome Lucifer had seen. He did get so worked up over these things sometimes.

Gabriel made a face. "I'm pretty sure that I just did."

"You had to know that we would come," Michael said. "That's why you're hiding, is it not?"

"I was hoping that you wouldn't," Gabriel said. "After all, I'm in hiding. There's not much point to be in hiding if people can just show up and see you whenever they want."

Michael shot Lucifer a triumphant look. So he was right about Gabriel not wanting to see them. That didn't seem like something to be proud of.

"Well that's not quite true," Lucifer drawled. "I've only been out for a short time and only decided to find you even more recently than that. Not that I didn't want to see you but I have a rather full schedule, you understand. Destroying humanity is not as simple as you would think."

"I'm not going to commiserate with you about that," Gabriel informed him.

"It's okay, I'm used to it," Lucifer said, shrugging. "It should be remembered, however, that I'm the one who found you when Michael clearly didn't care to look."

"That's not true!" Michael objected. "Raphael and I have spent a great deal of time looking for him! We haven't been looking as much in recent times because of just how long we couldn't find him and because we have more immediate concerns right now but we did look."

"I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing," Gabriel said. "On the one hand, I'd like to think that if I just go missing for thousands of years people would at least send out a search party, maybe put up some posters. But on the other, if I wanted to be found I would have been found. Or I wouldn't have left in the first place."

"We had actually considered whether it was just a cry for attention or not," Michael said.

Gabriel frowned. "Well it wasn't."

"Would you admit it if it was?" Michael asked.

"Irrelevant because it wasn't," Gabriel said.

"If you were looking so hard, Michael, why didn't you find him?" Lucifer challenged. "Are you just that bad at finding people?"

"I could just actually be good at hiding," Gabriel said. "I've had plenty of time to practice."

"How long did it take me to find you?" Lucifer asked pointedly.

"Well I don't know," Gabriel said. "How did you find me, anyway?"

"Sam Winchester."

Gabriel's eyebrows rose. "Sam Winchester? Are you serious? How would he even know where I was? And why would he tell you? If you can't get a yes out of him, how can you get anything else?"

"He might not have technically told me," Lucifer admitted. "But I asked him about you and he knew what you looked like these days and that you were slumming it."

"I am _not _slumming it!"

Lucifer tilted his head. "You kind of are. And once I had all that information, it was enough to find you. Michael either did not care enough to find this information or is terribly unresourceful."

"Are you quite done insulting me?" Michael asked.

"Sorry, do you think that accurately describing past events is insulting you?" Lucifer asked politely. "Because I have to tell you, that seems more like it's your fault for the way events turned out than it is mine."

"I'll take that as a no."

"How did you even know that the Winchesters would know who I was?" Gabriel demanded.

"I didn't _know_," Lucifer said, "but it hardly put me out to check. And I figured you'd at least make some sort of effort to stop this from happening and that would involve getting to the vessels. You failed, of course, but no hard feelings even if you were trying to leave me locked up in hell forever."

"That's magnanimous of you," Gabriel muttered.

"I've been told I take things extremely well."

"By who?" Michael asked incredulously.

"Were they demons? I bet they were demons," Gabriel said.

"Irrelevant. What surprised me wasn't so much that the vessels know you but that they know who you are," Lucifer said. "What could have possibly persuaded you to give them that information? Telling _anyone_, since you were hiding, was a bad idea but two individuals you knew were going to come into a great deal of contact with our respective sides? You might as well have told me and Michael yourself."

"It wasn't like that," Gabriel said, looking a little awkward.

"Oh?" Michael asked. "Then how did they know? Did they figure it out?"

"I…Lucifer wasn't wrong about me trying to stop this train back when it could still be stopped. I knew Dean was damned no matter what and he'd be breaking the first seal. But I thought if I could get Sam to deal with the loss of his brother in any sort of sane way that didn't involve him going off half-cocked with a demon blood dealer to kill Lilith then we had a chance," Gabriel said. "Unfortunately, no matter how many times Dean died or how long Sam had to live with that, he never seemed to get the picture. And I could have kept him there longer but at that point I rather doubted that he _ever _would and the way he looked at me…I'm not _that _heartless."

"How long did you make him live without Dean?" Michael asked curiously.

"You weren't keeping an eye on Dean dying prematurely and screwing up your plans?" Lucifer asked.

"This must have been after Dean sold his soul, at which point it wouldn't matter," Michael said. "The seal would break if the demon gave Sam back in exchange for Dean's life immediately or Dean had gotten ten years."

Gabriel nodded. "I must have killed Dean over a hundred times. Sam was getting progressively more unhinged as the time loops went by but I realized that I wasn't really giving him time to come to terms with Dean's death by having him keep popping up alive to die again. I was trying to desensitize him to it and I think that kind of worked. But after I let him catch me, I promised to end the time loops and then Dean went and got himself shot in the parking lot and I figured why not keep this going? And six months of Sam doing nothing but hunting and obsessing about me later and he still couldn't deal. But I don't get why he didn't turn to demon blood or try to make a demon deal then and he did when Dean actually did die even though that was only four months."

"Would Ruby have approached Sam in your time loop?" Lucifer asked. "And it might have been too soon in their relationship."

"Besides," Michael added, "he didn't need to sell his soul and turn to the same kind of crossroad demon that got them into that mess in the first place. He knew you were involved and you had fixed it before. You might have been responsible for the new death. If he couldn't get you to save Dean he might have branched out. There is one thing I don't understand, though."

"What?"

"If you were trying to stop Sam Winchester from breaking the final seal, allowing him to cope better with his brother's loss might not have been the best plan since he broke the final seal months after recovering his brother. You knew what the seals were. Why didn't you just warn Sam about the consequences of killing Lilith?" Michael asked reasonably.

There was silence and then Lucifer started laughing. "Oh, this is priceless! Trying to stop the apocalypse and the most obvious answer doesn't even occur to you, does it?"

Gabriel glared at him. "Well how was I going to be able to explain knowing any of that?"

"You could have thought of something," Lucifer told him. "Left it anonymously or given them something to consider, at least. But no, you had to choose the most indirect route available. No wonder it failed."

"It was always going to fail," Michael said. "This was meant to happen. But that doesn't mean that Gabriel didn't mishandle the situation."

"Why did I even tell you two about that at all?" Gabriel wondered.

"You were explaining how the Winchesters knew you when you didn't tell them," Lucifer reminded him.

"I don't know how much hope I actually had that I could stop this train wreck back when one of the princesses was in a different castle but I didn't think anything could stop it afterwards. So I didn't want to drag this out like Sam and Dean seemed determined to do and so I tried to talk them into consenting."

"That doesn't sound very anti-apocalypse to me," Lucifer noted.

Gabriel shrugged. "There's being against this and then there's being stupid and I thought it was best to just get it over with. So things were going fine until little Castiel showed up."

"That does tend to happen," Michael said.

"And of course I dealt with him, no problem. Even with his grace failing, he was just bullheaded enough to get to the boys. He recognized me instantly, and I knew he would, and the fact that I so easily dispatched him – twice – got them suspicious. They don't know a lot about tricksters but apparently they feel angels are more powerful. Not wrongly, I might add. And then their family has some of the same crap ours does, though usually on a less destructive scale, so they decided that what I said about the apocalypse was family history or whatever. And then once they trapped me in some holy fire there wasn't really any doubt. I didn't _have _to tell them who I was but at that point I figured what was even the point in hiding it? Castiel knew and I didn't trust them not to literally fry me to death if I didn't play nice and give him back."

"You got trapped in holy fire by the Winchesters, too?" Lucifer asked, unsure whether to laugh or throw something. It was really embarrassing for both Raphael and Gabriel that they had let that happen to them and, as their brother, that was hilarious. But the fact that humans had managed to so ensnare not one but two archangels? At least Castiel had been involved when it was Raphael.

"I didn't know I needed to be on the lookout for an angel trap and where did they even get holy oil anyway? I think I can safely blame Castiel and getting shown up by him is marginally less pathetic," Gabriel said. He spread his hands. "So. Now you know. I-" He broke off as a human woman approached them. "Don't you dare, Lucifer."

Lucifer looked innocently back at him. Who knew what he was even on about?

"Are you two ready to order?" the human asked brightly.

"No," Lucifer said.

Michael just stared at him.

Gabriel sighed. "Two orders of fries, please."

The woman wrote it down and left.

"I'm capable of some self-control, Gabriel," Lucifer said. "I'm not just going to kill every human I see."

Gabriel raised his eyebrows. "Aren't you, though? Isn't that your whole thing?"

He did have him there.

"Not right now. We didn't really talk about it but I kind of assumed my meetings with Michael would involve a time out on that kind of thing," Lucifer said.

"That is a good idea," Michael said. "I should have mentioned it."

"What am I even doing?" Gabriel asked.

"Right now?" Lucifer asked. "Or in general? Because if you wanted to rethink some life decisions-"

Gabriel wagged a finger at him. "Oh, no. You do not get to lecture me about good life decisions!"

"Does Michael?" Lucifer asked. "Because I'm sure he's been composing one for centuries."

"Millennia."

Gabriel made a face. "Yeah, I did not sign up for a lecture."

"Those usually aren't voluntary," Michael pointed out.

"Stop distracting me," Gabriel ordered.

"Stop making it so easy," Lucifer replied.

"I haven't seen either one of you for too many years to bother keeping track of," Gabriel said.

"That was hardly my fault," Lucifer said. "I was busy rotting away in hell."

"Which was your fault," Michael said.

"I think it was yours, really," Lucifer argued. "Maybe Father's."

"Wow, no, we are not starting this right now," Gabriel said quickly.

Michael closed his eyes. "Fine. Me not seeing you wasn't my fault either, Gabriel, seeing as how you spent that time doing everything in your power to not let me find you."

"Whose fault that is really isn't the point," Gabriel said. "Especially when I could easily point out that I didn't run away because I felt like going through a rebellious phase but you two were making it impossible to stay."

"No one else had that problem," Michael said.

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Well good for everyone else. All this time and the apocalypse has started and no one's told me anything about any plans changing so why are you two here to see me? And together, for that matter."

Well wasn't that an awkward question. Michael may not choose to see it but Lucifer was well aware just how absurd this whole situation was and just because he was choosing to indulge Michael that didn't change.

"Michael noticed how ridiculous Sam and Dean are being about this whole situation," Lucifer said.

"Ridiculous," Gabriel repeated. "Oh, yes, refusing to get themselves killed and help doom their planet because you two can't get over yourselves. Right. Of course they're being unreasonable."

"Didn't you say you tried to convince them to say yes as well?" Michael asked rhetorically.

"Sure but that doesn't mean I don't understand why they didn't go for it," Gabriel said. "They still can't win but it's not them who is being unreasonable."

"Not bowing to the inevitable is a bit unreasonable," Michael said.

Gabriel groaned. "Just continue. Michael noticed Sam and Dean weren't planning on saying yes."

"He decided to come to me so that we could pool our resources and get the answer we wanted sooner."

Gabriel took a moment to process that. "So he wanted to work with you so that the two of you could kill each other faster?"

"That's not how I would put it," Michael said.

"Yes, that's basically it," Lucifer said. "We went to see Sam and Dean and they proved stubborn. While I was there, I discovered how to locate you. I told Michael what my plan was and he wanted to come with me."

"And why was that?"

Michael and Lucifer shared a look. It felt too much like before.

"You can't honestly think that we wouldn't be worried," Michael said. "Gabriel, you've been gone longer than even Lucifer!"

"We've been here for, what, ten or fifteen minutes already and you haven't tried to kill me or ingratiate yourself or call me an abomination that must be destroyed once," Lucifer said. "As far as I'm concerned, you're my favorite brother."

"Did that just make me a little bit damned?" Gabriel wondered.

"Don't be so melodramatic."

"You say you were worried about me. That's cute. But we all know that all you two care about is your stupid fight and me and Raphael or the others or this whole planet is just an afterthought," Gabriel accused.

"What did I just say?" Lucifer asked. That was how these things got out of hand. One little query about whether or not the humans should really be destroyed like the blight upon the galaxy that they were and suddenly he was some sort of monster.

Beside him, Michael looked stricken. "You know that's not true, Gabriel. You know that we were looking for you and you knew that we would even before I told you because otherwise you wouldn't have needed to hide."

"So…what? You care about me? That's great. You care about Lucifer, too, and exactly how much hesitation are you having over killing him? That goes for you, too," Gabriel said, nodding to Lucifer. "The fact of the matter is that if I side with one of you the other will kill me."

"Is this cowardice then?" Lucifer demanded. "You know we're more powerful than you and you're trying to stay safe by staying out of it? I noticed Raphael still seems fine despite having turned his back on me the second Michael did."

"It's not cowardice!" Gabriel insisted. "How is it…do I want to die? Of course not. Unlike the humans or monsters, I don't have the luxury of knowing what happens next. I'll try to avoid it if I can. But it's not just fear. You should know me better than that."

"Then why bring up the fact you believe one of us would kill you?" Michael asked.

Gabriel made a face. "Don't pull that 'you believe' crap on me. If I were to support Lucifer and stand against you you know what you would do to me. Maybe you wouldn't want to but you would. If you could kill him then you could sure as hell kill me. And if I support Michael then only keeping safely out of Lucifer's way would give me any hope of making it through this. So I don't want to hear about how much you guys missed me because it all amounts to nothing in the end."

"Gabriel," Lucifer said slowly, "just because we'll probably all kill each other in the end doesn't mean that we don't care about you."

Gabriel threw his hands up in the air. "Are you even listening to yourselves? This is literally the most dysfunctional family I have ever heard of and, believe me, I really get around!"

The human returned and set the food down in front of Lucifer and Michael. Gabriel picked the plates up and put them in front of himself instead.

"You can't possibly hold us to the same standards as lesser beings, Gabriel," Michael told him. "How big are their families? Ours are literally every angel in existence. If you wanted to count all humans as one family they would certainly have us beat in the dysfunctional department."

Gabriel shook his head. "Even if I were just counting the four of us, we can't keep it together."

"He's right, though," Lucifer said. "How long does a human live? A century at most. And the creatures that live longer? They still don't come close to approaching our ages, even the oldest ones, and they tend to cut their ties to their families anyway. We have been around since the very beginning and we will be around until the end. Maybe the gods you spend time with are more huggy than us and the humans are more devoted but you can't compare it. You know you can't."

"And that gives you the excuse to do whatever you want?" Gabriel challenged.

Lucifer almost couldn't take the hypocrisy. "And what do you call Loki? Who gave you permission to do any of this?"

Gabriel narrowed his eyes. "I'm not trying to end the world."

"Everything ends, Gabriel," Lucifer said. "And Earth's time has come. I'd say it's sad except it's not. But I have seen the beauty of this world. Humanity has to go but I wouldn't count out everything else just yet."

"I wouldn't count out the human race completely," Michael said.

Gabriel slouched down in his chair. "Wonderful. You'll save them to spite him."

"As someone who wants all of the little humans to burn I don't care but if you do want them to live maybe you shouldn't be so picky about Michael's motives for stopping their extermination," Lucifer suggested.

"Why did you come here?" Gabriel asked again. "Nothing's changed. Except, maybe, that we've run out of time. You know I won't go with you. Either of you."

"We're running out of time," Michael said. "Maybe we just need to make the most of what time we do have. If you do side with Lucifer then, you're quite right, I cannot just abide that. But if you truly think you can stay out of this then I will support that."

"Really," Gabriel said, staring at him. "You'd _never _give anyone else that chance. You know you wouldn't."

"I would give it to Raphael," Michael said. "But he would never need it." He looked meaningfully at Lucifer.

"I have enough enemies," Lucifer said. "Virtually all of heaven. I don't want to win this just to end up sitting alone on a pile of rocks, Gabriel. I will kill anyone who doesn't give me another choice but I'd actually like to keep angel casualties to a minimum. I'm not hunting the angels who oppose me so if you really think you can sit this out, which you can't, I wouldn't go after you either."

"Why does everyone keep insisting that I can't stay out of this?" Gabriel asked, clearly frustrated.

"Might I suggest it's because you literally can't?"

"Oh, don't give me that, Lucifer."

"This…is not a small scale conflict," Michael said, choosing his words carefully.

What was he supposed to say? It was just so obvious that this was not a conflict that one could be neutral in and, given the stakes, he didn't even understand why anyone would want to. Yes, yes, Gabriel didn't want to hurt any of their brothers but who did? How to jam such a basic concept through Gabriel's thick skull? Maybe Michael could find the words.

"I kind of noticed that when I stopped being able to go anywhere without hearing about this mess," Gabriel said, frowning at them. "Sam and Dean even decided to drag me as a simple trickster into this mess! Is nothing sacred?"

"Not tricksters," Lucifer replied idly.

"Angels will fight and angels will die," Michael said. "Nothing any of us can do can stop that now."

Gabriel looked helplessly at them. "You say that…how can you sit there and say that? You two are literally the only two people in all of creation who _can _stop this! But you don't care. You want this."

It was so typically Gabriel to always have to oversimplify everything. It had been the same back then.

'But if you love each other and don't want to fight, why do you have to do this? Why can't you just say sorry? Does it really matter if the humans are there or not?'

Yes. Of course it mattered. Michael knew it mattered. But Gabriel had never been a person of conviction.

"We don't want this, Gabriel," Michael explained patiently. "We have to do this."

"Says who?"

"You know who," Michael said.

"I don't know, he might have a point there," Lucifer said. "I haven't heard anything from Him since before I left. From what I understand, no one has except Joshua. And that's just what he says. I don't even know if I believe him or not."

To his surprise, Gabriel turned to glare at him. "No, no, _no_. You do not get to derail this, Lucifer! Pick at each other later. Michael, you say you have to do this. You say Dad told you to. Well what would happen if you didn't?"

Michael sat there, still as a statue. It had probably never even occurred to Michael to do anything other than exactly what their father wanted or at least what he believed He had wanted in those long years of silence. Even when Lucifer had all but begged him, it had never even crossed his mind.

"I would be being a bad son," Michael said finally. "I would be like Lucifer."

"Do you really have to bring me up as an example?" Lucifer asked, annoyed.

Michael seemed confused. "But you are the prototypical example. You were the first to fall. Everyone who has fallen afterwards has done so because of you in some way. Even Anna, who wanted the chance to experience humanity, did what she did because she thought she was running out of time because soon the apocalypse would happen."

"And people wonder why I'm always going on about personal responsibility," Lucifer said, staring up at the ceiling.

"But this is a choice you're making," Gabriel said, trying to bring them back on track. "The choice to be the good son. You could make the other choice if you wished and nothing would be stopping you."

"I suppose so," Michael said. "But really, Gabriel, what difference does that even make?"

"It makes a difference because you're not the victim here, Michael. You're not the drone. You could stop this and maybe that would still lead to Lucifer torching the planet but this has always been at least half your doing and I'm sick of hearing how you have no choice. You always did, more than any of us."

"It's destiny."

"If it can be ignored so easily, what does that even mean?" Gabriel asked. "You're going to keep on going the same way you always have and never, ever allow yourself to think of any other possibility and I can't stop you but I want you to remember that you're choosing this. You may not want it but you're choosing it."

"And what about him?" Michael asked, jerking his head over towards Lucifer. "I wouldn't even be in a position to oppose Lucifer as Father wanted or to let him destroy this world if it weren't for his choices."

"And maybe if you hadn't cast me into hell when I was just trying to address some legitimate concerns about what despicable creatures the humans are then it wouldn't have come to that."

"How can you even still talk about how despicable they are when you made them into demons which are far worse?" Michael demanded.

"It's their humanity that let me twist them in the first place! No matter how much I could torture an angel, or even one of the monsters, they wouldn't become like that! Inflicting so much pain on someone that they start to love pain and wish to inflict it on as many people as they can, just because it amuses them? How can any creature that reacts like that be anything but what I said?" Lucifer asked, his eyes flashing.

"You certainly don't seem to have to be forcing yourself to kill large numbers of humans and technically our battle has not yet begun!"

"Okay, okay, no, we're not doing this," Gabriel declared. "The last thing we need is for the apocalypse to start right here in this diner and I am _so _not down for playing mediator."

Lucifer smiled deliberately over at Michael. "I can be reasonable."

"So can I," Michael insisted.

"Good. Now, as much as I'm not supporting Michael here I mentioned his choice in the matter so I have to add that you have a choice, too, Lucifer," Gabriel said.

"Do I, though?"

Gabriel looked at him like he was crazy. "Yes. You almost have more of a choice than Michael because his choice is how to respond to you. You're the one who created this situation in the first place."

"Actually, God is the one who created the situation by creating the humans in the first place," Lucifer argued.

"I'm going to borrow your buzzword and say 'personal responsibility' because He could have created whatever He wanted and you didn't have to decide to rebel and twist a human soul into a demon and…well, everything else that happened. What's more, you could stop this right now and know Michael would never strike you down if you wouldn't fight him. And this is not a judgment on your actions!" Gabriel said, holding up a hand to forestall whatever protest he imagined Lucifer might make. "Just pointing out that you made your choice."

"Fine. So I did. I'm not the one who doesn't believe in free will here," Lucifer said easily. He might not have given in so easily if he didn't enjoy the angry flares of Michael's grace that very deliberately did not play out over his vessel's face.

"So there we have it. You two are making this happen and I don't want anything to do with it."

"How can you just stay out of it, though?" Michael asked, mystified.

"Just because you could never stay out of it doesn't mean everyone else is similarly trapped," Gabriel said. "I just stay out of the way. Angel conflict going on? Zap, I'm in Australia."

"No, I mean really. If you do not help me stop Lucifer then isn't that supporting his side in a way?" Michael asked rhetorically. "You are not providing any aid but you are taking away from his opposition. And while Lucifer is indeed stronger than you are, you would be one of the most effective opponents he could have."

"People not helping you are not helping me by default!" Lucifer argued. "I might as well say he's on your side because he's not helping me. And your side has fare more firepower than mine. There are very few demons who can stand up to even the weakest angel and you control nearly all of them. Not to mention Raphael who frankly could decimate all of my forces except for me. So his not siding with me hurts my cause more than not siding with you hurts yours."

"I'm not sure you two really grasp the concept of neutrality if it's making you think about whose side being neutral makes me on," Gabriel complained. "I get that you two don't understand my choices and I get that you don't think it's possible but I've done a pretty good job of staying out of it so far, even since the first seal was broken and after Lucifer was freed, and I like my chances. Assuming you two would just leave me out of it."

"I just…don't understand what makes you so special," Lucifer told him. "Everyone else has chosen a side! Everyone! Even Castiel, misguided little lost boy that he is, has chosen a side. He picked the vessels so his judgment is suspect at best but he did it. No one else gets to sit this one out. Why should you?"

"Oh, I don't know, Lucifer. Why did Anna get hunted and then tortured for deciding to go play at being human for a while, even once she went back to normal? Why haven't I heard anything about any kind of repercussion for what I've done? Why are angels killed for supporting you but you yourself are safe until you and Michael agree upon a start date for your fight?" Gabriel demanded. "What could possibly explain the different treatment people are receiving?"

"Yes, yes, we're both archangels and things work differently for us," Lucifer said impatiently. "I know. But the three of us have all chosen sides if we haven't created them. Why do you get to stay out of it?"

"This isn't my fight!" Gabriel exclaimed.

"How is this not your fight?" Michael demanded. "Gabriel, this is everyone's fight. I literally cannot think of anything that could matter more than this. The stakes couldn't be higher unless something truly outlandish happened and Father's life lay in the balance or something."

"I wouldn't kill Father even if I could," Lucifer scoffed. "I love Him, even after all of this."

"You have a funny way of showing it," Michael sniped.

"Kind of like how you show your love for me," he shot back.

"Focus," Gabriel ordered. "This may seem like high stakes to you two because you're at the center of it and you insist on dragging the rest of the universe into your problems but honestly, at its core this is just about your interpersonal issues. If you two worked through your shit and got along again we wouldn't be having this apocalypse at all. This is a very simple, very petty family vendetta that your powers and your egos have allowed you to inflict on the rest of us. You can claim it's about ideals if you want but we all know the truth. Lucifer can't deal with not being the favorite anymore so he's throwing a tantrum and Michael is too petrified of not being the perfect son to do anything but blindly stumble after the crumbs of a plan he thinks Daddy left him when He ditched all of us thousands of years ago. So, I'm sorry, but this is not my fight and you can't make it mine."

The thing was, that did sound like an unflattering but not untruthful description of Michael. And the fact that he was imprisoned and not killed and his cage had a difficult but not impossible way to open indicated their father had intended for him to get out one day. Still, Michael was making an awful lot of assumptions about everything else and pretending he knew for certain it was what God wanted.

But to dismiss all of Lucifer's very valid reasons to be upset as just a tantrum because there was a new favorite? It was beyond belief. Yes, he couldn't very well deny that he was displeased to be replaced in his father's affection. What was wrong with that? Would anyone have been happy if one day they were the favorite and the next there was another occupying that spot? He was but one being and the new favorite was an entire race of people. He could potentially beat out another being and reclaim his spot but there was no conceivable way to prove himself more worthy than an entire race. But Lucifer was no so petty as to hate and want to destroy humanity for that!

It was worse than that, oh so much worse. If the humans had been worthy then he could have lived with it. He would not have been happy and probably never would have liked them all that much (he could admit to a little pettiness) but none of the angels _really _liked humanity. Well, maybe a few but they were few and far between.

But they weren't.

Humans were the most flawed creatures he had ever encountered and he had seen the Leviathan. He had studied them extensively, hoping to understand, but all he could see were more flaws. They were ignorant and petty and cruel. Each and every one of them could become monstrous if you just applied the right pressure. He hadn't even been trying to create demons with Lilith. He just found one little soul, someone innocent and good, and started to experiment. He hadn't wanted to be biased, after all, and start with someone already corrupt. He wanted to see what would happen, how far humanity could fall. And he had seen it and it was worse than he even thought possible.

He could admit that angels weren't perfect either but they weren't _that_. They weren't anything like that. They wouldn't turn on each other at the slightest provocation and betray each other as a matter of course. They wouldn't trade away their very souls (not that they even had them) for fleeting material gain. They wouldn't kill each other if there was any other option they could see and they would always care when they had to. They knew who and what they were and wouldn't be so easily led astray.

"Watch what you say," he warned.

"Just because you are our brother does not give you leave to say such things," Michael said severely. "You have been gone too long."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Or what? You won't touch me for not supporting you but if I'm not being _nice _enough then you'll kill me?"

"Of course not!" Michael insisted. "Right, Lucifer?"

Lucifer said nothing.

"Lucifer!"

"What?" Lucifer asked.

He would like to say that he would never kill Gabriel over mere words, no matter how provocative, but he was well aware of just how infuriating Gabriel could be. He wouldn't want to, not really, and he would regret it but all the regret in the world couldn't change it if he did decide to actually stab his angel blade through Gabriel's throat. Castiel might have been restored to life but Castiel was trying to stop the apocalypse and Gabriel might not like the apocalypse but he wasn't really doing anything about that. He didn't know how Michael didn't see what that meant, that God didn't want the apocalypse. He knew that even before Castiel's death. Maybe Michael just didn't want to see it but their father _loved _humanity far beyond reason. That had been the start of all of this. Of course He wouldn't want them all destroyed or even a large portion of them should Michael come out on top. Where would humans even fit into an angel paradise anyway?

"I think that speaks for itself," Gabriel said.

Michael gave him a look that was far too disappointed to be fair.

"Everything I've done and not rushing to deny that I would kill Gabriel is letting you down?"

"It's not potentially killing Gabriel," Michael replied. "Depending on the choices he makes, I might do just that. But you're talking about killing him because you don't like what he's saying. I don't like what he's saying, either, but that goes too far. He's not the humans that you hate so much. He's our brother."

"Not to mention that you never get so upset unless you know I'm right," Gabriel said.

"Or that you're so wrong that the insult of you truly believing it cannot be borne," Lucifer countered.

"So we will not kill you for what you say," Michael said. "Even Lucifer."

"I'm just saying, at some point you need to stop being let down by me," Lucifer said.

Michael turned impossibly sad eyes on him. He was doing that on purpose. "Yes. I do." He turned back to Gabriel. "We won't kill you for that, Gabriel. But we are your brothers and we're not used to being challenged. If you really think that there's nothing we can do to you short of killing you then that's an uncharacteristic lack of imagination."

Gabriel bristled at that. "Is that a threat?"

"Does it sound like a threat?" Lucifer asked pleasantly.

"I don't believe it matters what you call it," Michael said. "It is what it is and it is absolutely ridiculous that you're resorting to 'make me stop' when we simply asked you to be more respectful. We are your brothers."

"Don't give me the whole brotherhood lecture, you want to kill each other and have led everyone else to killing their brothers," Gabriel said, crossing his arms.

"Why does everyone think I want this?" Michael asked, shifting uncomfortably in his seat.

"Probably because you keep choosing this," Gabriel suggested.

"We may be trying to kill each other but we're doing it with respect," Lucifer said.

"I think it's much less respectful to try and kill someone than to say some not nice – but completely true – things about them," Gabriel said.

"We are not expecting you to be who you are not, Gabriel. We understand your taste for irreverence," Michael said. "Just do not push it and we will be fine."

"We'll be fine while you try to drag me into your fight."

"So you believe that it all comes down to Michael and me. Regardless of the, uh, validity of that interpretation, the fate of this entire planet is at stake. And while I'm sure some angels don't care about that-" Lucifer started to say.

"What, and you do?" Gabriel interrupted.

Lucifer nodded. "But of course. If I didn't care I wouldn't kill them. While some angels don't care, you have been hiding here since before my imprisonment. Don't tell me you haven't gotten attached; I won't believe you."

"What if I did care?" Gabriel asked. "I can't stop you."

"I'm not the one trying to destroy the human race, Gabriel."

"Stop recruiting," Lucifer ordered.

But Gabriel was shaking his head. "I can't. I just can't. I don't want the humans to die but I don't want Michael to win and kill Lucifer and I don't want Lucifer to win and to kill Michael. I can't kill my brothers."

"You think we want this?" Michael asked. "You think _Raphael_ wanted this? He's a healer, Gabriel!"

"I'm not denying that!"

"Then what is it?" Michael demanded. "Why can everyone else get over themselves and kill if necessary but not you?"

"I…I don't know," Gabriel said, looking down. "I don't know how any of you can bring yourself to do it, honestly, and I especially don't get how you two can put the humans you hate or don't care for above each other's lives. How can I tell you why I'm the one who can't when I don't understand why everyone else can? I _can't_."

"You mean you won't," Lucifer said.

"_You _won't," Gabriel accused. "I don't believe in your cause, either of yours. Maybe if I did…but I don't. And I cannot and will not kill over this. And I won't watch it happen."

"What do you want then?" Lucifer asked. "You want to just bury your head in the sand again and come out when it's all over?"

"Why not?" Gabriel asked flippantly. "It's been working so far."

"We won't let you go again," Michael said. "We have found you and we know you intend to run and will find you."

Gabriel threw his hands up in the air. "To what end? I told you already, I will not help you."

"But you're our brother," Michael said. "You have been gone for too long."

"Barely longer than Lucifer," Gabriel said. "Though I guess you put an end to his little time-out, too."

"That was not exactly-" Michael cut himself off. "You are not our enemy, Gabriel. You can't bear to kill us but you can't understand why we don't want you to disappear again? It was only your carelessness in exposing yourself to the vessels and Lucifer's creativity that allowed us to find you this time. Next time you wouldn't make that same mistake."

Gabriel swallowed. "Maybe I can understand that. But I'm not going back to heaven."

"You'd better not," Lucifer said. "That's Team Michael."

"That's really all we ask," Michael said. "Stay around. See people when you want to, let them see you if they want to. Just…be around. We're all rather busy right now with the apocalypse but it will be good to know you're there."

Gabriel stared incredulously at him.

"What?"

"Really? You're busy? _Really_?"

"Yes," Michael said. "Why do you doubt that?"

"You're hanging out with Lucifer," Gabriel said.

"We need Sam and Dean to consent," Michael said. "We are attempting to be efficient."

"And bothering me?"

"Well, that was important," Michael said.

Gabriel said nothing but he did look a little mollified at that.

Lucifer smiled and shook his head. "That could have gone so much worse."


	4. Chapter 4

When Michael told Raphael about Gabriel, Raphael had quietly heard him out then left without a word. Days had passed since then and Raphael had not given any indication that he knew anything about their wayward brother.

Michael wished he would say something, show some interest in seeing him, but he wouldn't force him. He understood. It was the same reason Raphael insisted their father was dead. Michael couldn't stand to live in a world where He was dead and maybe that biased him. But he just could not fathom anything be able to destroy the one who created everything. Oh, Death may claim he would one day reap Him but that was future tense. Maybe he even could buy why would he hide it? Wouldn't they notice? No, no matter which way Michael looked at it, God was alive.

Why had He gone? That was harder. There was no clear answer. Lucifer was the best answer he could come up with. Metatron had said something about Gadreel before he, too, had vanished but wasn't the tale of Gadreel's failure really the story of Lucifer's treachery? It all led back to him. And Lucifer might argue with that but if not for Lucifer then what?

Which led back to Raphael and his stubborn insistence their father was dead. He looked at every atrocity the human race had perpetuated on each other and asked why God would have allowed it if He lived. Michael didn't have an answer, he never did, but hadn't He allowed worse before He left? He had allowed Lucifer to question until the point of rebellion. It had been so long now and everyone was used to him being the villain, the bad son, could not even imagine a life without it. But despite how much time had passed, it still didn't make sense to Michael.

Fortunately he need not understand Lucifer in order to kill him. Once Lucifer had rebelled, God had allowed him to lead humanity into sin. He had allowed Lucifer to twist that little human soul into a depth of evil that was shocking and repugnant and deeply pitiful. He had let that demonic virus grow. He had let Abel be tempted and Cain, steadfast and virtuous Cain, sacrifice himself and drown in blood until he had stunned them all and just sort of…quit being a demon. The Mark was still there, the blood thirst and the black eyes, but he kept bees these days and bothered no one. God hadn't intervened until Michael was bid to cast Lucifer into hell and Gabriel had fled and everything was ruined.

He could have stopped it all and yet He chose not to. That meant He allowed it. And his father was never wrong so there must be a reason. Michael could never understand but he had to believe in the plan just the same.

Raphael didn't want God to be dead but he didn't want Him to be gone, either, and he would rather think God was dead than God had abandoned him. It was the same reason it took him so long to ask about Gabriel.

"Will he run again?"

Michael looked over. Raphael looked indifferent to the answer but of course Michael knew better. "He could. It has been a long time and I do not understand his choices. But I do not believe so. Lucifer and I agreed we would let him try his grand experiment in neutrality, for all the good that will do. If he realizes he cannot stay out of it he may run again. But he is stubborn and he hasn't accepted that he must get involved yet. His denial may outlive Lucifer."

"Do you really believe that Lucifer will keep his promises?" Raphael demanded. "You can leave him be all you want but what about our other brother?"

"It was Lucifer's idea to find Gabriel in the first place," Michael said. "He found him after all this time. I almost wish it hadn't been so easy for him, for all I am glad of the result."

"Lucifer is not as strong as you," Raphael said. "The angels foolish enough to support him openly are few and far between and his hidden supporters are cowards. Few demons can stand up to an angel and the most they can do is banish us to heaven. He will want the support of an archangel."

"Perhaps. But Gabriel didn't spend thousands of years running to fall in line behind Lucifer now," Michael said. "And joining Lucifer will require him to kill more angels than joining us. No one made Lucifer bring me or even tell me of his plan to find Gabriel. I believe that is a good sign of his intentions."

The look Raphael gave him was deeply unimpressed. "Lucifer's intentions are _never _good. I knew spending this time with Lucifer would warp your perspective of him."

"In what way is my perspective warped?" Michael asked, offended. "I still know who and what he is and will do my duty when the time comes."

"You just said that you trusted him not to go after Gabriel and to keep his word. Lucifer. Of all people. You trust him."

Putting it like that was hardly fair. "It's not like you don't trust him to be evil and want to destroy humanity."

"That's not exactly 'trust'," Raphael pointed out. "Maybe expect. When you trust someone you expect some sort of positive behavior out of them and nothing I think Lucifer will do is in any way positive."

"It will be fine," Michael said.

"So you say," Raphael said. "And I do believe that you have every intention of following through with killing him right now. But you weren't saying anything about trusting him not to go after Gabriel when he wishes to remain neutral before you started meeting with him."

"I always expected him to leave angels who were not fighting alone," Michael said. "We are the only ones he likes, really, for all that's a very sad state of affairs given our…conflict. I didn't expect him to choose to leave Gabriel alone before only because before we met our brother was still lost to us and I had not anticipated this changing."

"Of course, you say that after you have been meeting with him," Raphael said.

Michael just gave him a look.

Raphael sighed. "Michael, I know how important this is to you but I also know how hard this is. If you did not still care for Lucifer then it would not be so important to you that Father commanded this. You would just do it because Lucifer's actions go against heaven and we are not to let demons destroy the Earth."

Michael looked away. "I never pretended that he was not important. But it is my duty."

"I know," Raphael said gently. "But it has been literally thousands of years since he was sealed away. If after all that time, the prospect of killing him has not become easier…tell me you do not find the idea of killing him now harder than it would have been had you only met again on the day your fight truly began."

"I…cannot do that," Michael admitted reluctantly. "But I will do what I have to. You know that."

"I just don't want this to cause you any more pain that it has to."

Michael bowed his head. "I thank you for that. But this is my choice and I do have a valid reason to be in Lucifer's company. I am not just visiting him. I need to kill him and I cannot do that until we are both in our vessels. You do not think it is wise for me to drag this out? Going to Lucifer is how I intend to make sure that this ends as quickly as it can."

* * *

Dean was not happy to see him though it was not as though Michael had been fool enough to expect otherwise.

"Where's your buddy Lucifer?" he practically spat.

Michael gave him a disappointed look. "Lucifer is not my 'buddy', he is my brother. And he is not here."

"All I know is that he better not be off harassing _my _brother," Dean said dangerously.

Michael knew that he was but it wasn't as though this little human would be able to rescue him and it would only add an unnecessary distractor to this already difficult conversation.

"How did you even find me?" Dean demanded. "What is the point of these damn rib carvings if everyone can find us whenever they fucking feel like it?"

"It is not nearly as easy as you imply, Dean," Michael said. "It takes work to find you but your movements do tend to be predictable and there are some rather _human_ means of tracking you down."

Dean stared pointedly at the sky. "Well as long as I'm inconveniencing you to do this."

"Do you enjoy inconveniencing people, Dean?"

Dean blinked. "Generally, yes."

"And you would let the world burn to inconvenience me?" Michael asked, taking care to look disappointed. The fact he looked like Dean's father, albeit younger than Dean was used to, should add to the effect.

"Check the script, pal," Dean said. "Letting the world burn is not on the table and it's why I want nothing to do with you."

Michael sighed. "You do remember that I am not the one who want so destroy the world?"

Dean rolled his eyes. "Not all of it, fine. But are you really telling me that you'll be shedding a tear for all of the millions of people who are going to die?"

"Why would I?" Michael asked, puzzled. "Anyone killed by an angel, which will be everyone who dies in our battle, will automatically go to heaven regardless of their sins or even if their soul has already been promised elsewhere. And those that survive will have paradise on Earth before enjoying the paradise of heaven."

"That doesn't matter!"

Michael raised an eyebrow. "It doesn't?"

Dean let out an annoyed breath. "Well, fine, yeah it does. But people don't want to die!"

"Of course they don't," Michael said. "But I think they'd find that preferable to living under Lucifer's rule. Or being personally killed by him or his demons – and being killed by a demon offers no instant heaven – instead of just being collateral damage. They're very creative you know, particularly Lucifer. None of us, not even him, knew what would happen when he took that very first human soul and just started…twisting."

Unbidden, Dean shuddered. "Stop acting like those are the only two options! It's not just letting Lucifer ruin everything or letting you save everyone!"

"I'm sorry, Dean, but I'm afraid that's exactly what it is," Michael said.

"No, it isn't. Just stop this whole thing. You could do it right now."

Michael raised his eyebrows. "So what you want me to do is to just stop having any part in this?"

Dean looked like he wanted to shake him. "Yes!"

"I could do that," Michael agreed easily.

Instantly, Dean was suspicious. "What's the catch?"

"No catch," Michael said. "I could abandon my responsibilities right now. It would be easy. Convincing me to actually do that would not be quite so easy but I could. It's just that is that really what you want?"

"Do you have some sort of comprehension problem?" Dean demanded. "I've been saying that this whole time!"

"You have," Michael agreed. "But you do realize that me not getting involved won't be what saves your world."

Dean's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

"I know you blame both of us for this and I will concede that we may have sped up the timeline a little and you would have undoubtedly preferred that this happen in another few decades-"

"Try 'literally never'," Dean said. "Or at least another few millennia!"

"It had to be in your lifetime, Dean," Michael explained patiently. "You and Sam are both needed for this."

"You brought Dad back after he's been dead awhile," Dean said dismissively. "There's no reason why you couldn't have brought me and Sam back after Lucifer got out on his own with no assistance from the people who are _supposed _to be trying to stop him."

"That is true," Michael said. "We didn't but it is something to take into consideration for next time."

"What do you mean 'next time'?"

"We waited as long as we could," Michael said. "But, being human, I do not think you really understand the meaning of even one millennium, let alone as many as have passed since Lucifer fell."

"I think I might actually have negative sympathy to you getting bored of waiting for Lucifer to find a way out of the cage on his own," Dean told him.

"You overstate our involvement," Michael said. "Azazel was the one with the plan to free him. We had nothing to do with that. He set it all into motion before any of us had even set foot on Earth again. And we could have prevented it, perhaps, but honestly if we nipped every plot to free Lucifer in the bud he'd never have gotten out of that cage."

"Huh."

"What?"

"I didn't know it was possible to feel _that _much anti-sympathy for someone and yet my sympathy continues to drop," Dean replied. " 'We were bored' is never an excuse for anything. Like ever. And certainly not letting your psycho brother out of time out so he can destroy the world."

"So he can _try _to destroy the world," Michael corrected. "We're really not that irresponsible."

"The fact that you can say any variation of the words 'we're not irresponsible' and actually mean them is nothing short of a marvel," Dean said.

"We could have eventually brought you back," Michael said. "But would you have really been any more open to the idea of the apocalypse and serving as my vessel had we brought the two of you back in, say, five million years for the sole purpose of stopping Lucifer who had somehow finally managed to get out without you being able to direct any blame towards heaven?"

Dean thought about it. "Well, if it truly wasn't your fault we were even in this mess and Lucifer was destroying the world and it was me or bust then I probably would, actually. My brother would be even less likely to say yes than he already is because it's not like Lucifer needs to have a better experience destroying the world. That's not really your problem, though, and if Lucifer could find a back-up vessel or something, like that guy he's wearing now, then I'd be glad to help."

"The problem with that scenario, other than the fact that we're not just rewinding time and starting all this over-"

"That actually sounds like the best idea you've had yet," Dean interrupted.

"We're not doing that. Huge changes like that are rarely utilized for a reason and I'm pretty satisfied with how the apocalypse is playing out now."

"Well you're not getting a yes out of me anytime soon with that attitude," Dean said, crossing his arms petulantly.

"You weren't planning on saying yes to me before."

"And now I'm even less likely." Dean cocked his head. "Although I guess if I still said no either way it's a little hard to calculate that."

"Other than the fact that we're not restarting this," Michael said loudly. "If you just lived your life and died and went to heaven until you were needed to serve as a vessel, how would you get to hell to break the first seal? That could not be accomplished in your lifespan if you were really interested in not having Lucifer freed for quite some time."

"What, you couldn't send me to hell later?"

"I could," Michael said. "But in addition to the fact that that would be us aiding the demons with my brother's release even more directly than we actually did, which you already take issue with, I wouldn't just send a soul that has done nothing wrong to hell!"

Dean looked almost insultingly surprised. "You wouldn't?"

Michael's eye twitched. "What kind of a leader of heaven do you think I am?"

"You, uh, you really don't want me to answer that one," Dean said, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Evidently not. If you arrived in heaven I would do nothing to ensure you were unjustly ripped away and condemned to perdition. I would find it in bad form if you were to complain about my not being willing to damn you and how that makes your wish to have the apocalypse in the future a bit harder to manage."

Dean held up his hands. "Hey, I ain't complaining. I've been there. And I'm not looking to brainstorm ways to get me thrown into hell. But am I really the only one you could have used? I mean, not to give you people ideas or anything, but Alastair said something about my father being a righteous man as well."

"You're quite right about that," Michael confirmed. "Had your father not managed to escape hell when he did, eventually he would have been the one to break the first seal. He had already held on much longer than you but the demons would have had an eternity to work on him and when you ended up in hell, for I believe your soul was already sold by that point, they might very well have offered to spare you if he gave in. I believe he would have done that."

Dean fidgeted uncomfortably. "Yeah, I get it. My dad was all kinds of badass and he held out more than three times as long as I did and never broke. I know. I fucked up."

Michael peered curiously at him. "You think…? Dean, that was not meant as a condemnation! No one can withstand torture indefinitely. Say you had matched your father's defiance. You would have stayed there all the longer. If you had said yes the moment they asked you would have saved yourself a lot of pain."

Dean's eyes flashed. "I wasn't about to start torturing some poor bastard just because I didn't want it to be me!"

"I know," Michael said quietly. "They needed to break you. And while thirty years isn't a hundred, it isn't nothing, either. And you were under Alastair. Just because your father outlasted you and managed to escape, which only happened because you and your brother failed to stop the devil's gate from being opened, doesn't mean you were weak."

Dean chuckled weakly. "When did this turn into a pep talk, huh?"

"I merely speak the truth. What you did was necessary and, once your soul was bargained away, it was inevitable that it would have been you," Michael said. "You bear no blame for this."

Dean's mouth tightened and he closed his eyes. "Tell that to Bela. Tell that to-" He broke off.

"Those souls you tortured were as condemned as you were. Some of them were bad people, some just made bad choices. I cannot say if they deserve what happens to them down there, only that the existence of hell was planned by my brother Lucifer and allowed by my father. If it wasn't you, it would have only been someone else. You couldn't save them."

"Yeah, well, where I come from 'someone else would have done it' doesn't excuse shit," Dean said harshly.

Michael sighed. "You are harder on yourself than you need to be, Dean. You are a righteous man."

"And what does that even mean, anyway?" Dean demanded. "I'm so righteous I tortured people and I _liked _it."

"Well of course you did," Michael said matter-of-factly.

Dean glared at him. "And what's that supposed to mean?"

"Dean, listen to me. You are a good person. You are a righteous person. That is proven fact or the first seal would never have broken and you would not be my fated vessel," Michael said. "You didn't want to torture those souls. That's why you held off for thirty years despite thirty years of opportunities to say yes. You know that you didn't have a choice. Not really."

Still, Dean was stubborn. "I didn't have to enjoy it."

"Yes you did."

"How do you figure?" Dean asked skeptically.

"You had broken. You had gone about as far as you could go saying no and you knew that you were going to have to hurt a lot of people in the future," Michael said. "You could either be miserable and make it even harder for yourself or you could enjoy it and spare yourself the extra torment."

Dean's shoulders were rigid. "I didn't choose to like it."

"Not a choice but a coping mechanism," Michael corrected. "I said before none of us knew what to expect when Lucifer began torturing that soul. Lilith. None of us really know why it happened the way it did or how becoming a demon allows them to use the power of their souls the way they do."

"Wait, I thought demons don't have souls," Dean said, looking confused.

"It's not a matter of _having _souls but of being them," Michael said. "Humans are souls in bodies. They can barter those souls away but demons are what they are and they cannot part with the twisted remains of their soul. I have seen humans face down a great deal of torture, the kind that you – not having become a demon – could not even imagine."

Dean raised an eyebrow. "And did you do anything about the torture or just watch?"

Michael ignored that. "They're still deeply damaged when they become demons. Based on her actions, it's entirely possible that Ruby loved Sam and yet she used him to free Lucifer and thought he'd come around to her perspective. That is not human love or angel love. But demons are more functional than a tortured human and they can endure more pain. Some even like it. I've always suspected becoming a demon is how a human soul protects itself. I would hate to see what would happen to a human soul if it didn't have the power to transform and detach. You enjoyed it, Dean, but now you regret. What more could you possibly ask of yourself? What difference would another few years of torture make before you accepted your fate?"

Dean was quiet for a long moment. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because it is true."

"Bullshit. You want something."

"You always knew what I wanted," Michael said. "And yet that has no bearing on this. What happened was not your fault and you should not be blaming yourself unduly."

"Not all of us believe in all this fate crap that lets us off the hook for our actions."

"And so once again the illusion of free will causes suffering," Michael said.

"I don't quite think that's the take-away here," Dean shot back.

"Dean, you are a righteous man because that is just who you are. It's not something that you have to try to be and it's not something that can ever be taken away from you. It's just at the core of you no matter what you become or what you do," Michael said. "To get back to your earlier question, you are not the only righteous man in the world. Your father is one as well as are many others. But righteous men rarely wind up in hell."

"It didn't take much to get me and my dad there and we even knew what we were doing," Dean argued.

"You and your father had the personal attention of the king of hell," Michael replied. "You had those forces hounding you for more than twenty years. Righteous men only end up in hell for one reason."

"Deals."

Michael nodded. "Deals. Most humans live their whole lives without hearing anything about deals. No matter what easy prey they would be to a crossroad demon or how little the value of their prize, their souls are safe because of their ignorance. But some humans do know and some righteous men are tempted. Never for themselves, of course, or they would not be righteous. But your father died for you and you died for your brother. Is it so hard to believe another righteous man might do the same?"

"And then they become righteous demons," Dean said sarcastically. "If it's happened before then why did they need me? Why didn't one of them break the seal? Or did they all outlast me, too?"

"Lilith wasn't freed," Michael said simply. "The seals couldn't begin breaking before she was. Why do you think Azazel didn't kill the brother he knew he probably needed until right before he was going to free Lilith? If you went to hell and broke before she was freed it would be useless. And, not that he would know this, if you became a demon taking you as a vessel would be…complicated."

"Azazel seemed surprised that I saved Sam," Dean said uncertainly.

"He was a demon," Michael pointed out.

"Not interfering and letting Azazel run around trying to jumpstart the apocalypse isn't the only thing you did to start the apocalypse," Dean said accusingly.

Michael sighed. "If this is about how we kept you from Sam the night that he killed Lilith then-"

"It's not," Dean cut him off. "But that, too, come to think of it. You could have protected the seals. You _should _have protected the seals. Angels died defending them, you know, the people you claim to care about, and that whole time you were waiting to fail. Waiting to free Lucifer."

"What makes you think that, even though we intended for Lucifer to be released, we did not do everything we could to protect the seals?" Michael asked. "There were over six hundred and she only needed to break a small fraction. Our numbers are great but they are not limitless."

"I've got some questions about those angel deaths given that only an angel blade can kill an angel," Dean said. "But, more importantly, Zachariah outright told me that you guys were lying to most angels and pretending to protect the seals because they wouldn't be on board with the whole freeing Lucifer thing. He said that there was no way you'd actually let sixty-five seals get broken unless you wanted them to be. And he could just be bragging or lying to save face given the terrible job he did saving seals but you know what? I believe him."

Zachariah had really said all of that? He must have because how else would Dean have ever gotten the idea in the first place? Why would he do that? If that was the sort of thing he said to Dean no wonder Dean did not like him. Yes, it was too late by then for Dean to stop Lucifer rising (as if he ever could) but they still needed him to trust them enough to say yes and that was not how to go about winning his trust. Why would he complicate things by letting Dean believe anything more than Lucifer was bad and needed to be stopped? If Zachariah hadn't said that then perhaps Michael would have already gotten what he needed from Dean.

He was going to have to speak with Zachariah when he was done here.

"Every angel who fought and died in a great loss," Michael said solemnly. "I did want Lucifer to rise up so that I could crush him once and for all but everyone who fought did so without any knowledge of that wish. I did not _let _this happen."

"Could you have done more to stop it?"

"I could have killed Lilith."

Dean's eyes widened. It was clear he hadn't thought of that. "Why tell me this now?"

"Lies clearly haven't done either of us any good," Michael replied. "Now we can spend all day discussing what might have beens or we can acknowledge the world we're dealing with now. Lucifer is free now. Sam will say yes one day. You know he will."

"I don't know anything of the kind," Dean growled but his voice lacked conviction.

"Even if he doesn't, but he will, Lucifer isn't going to put off destroying the planet forever," Michael said. "One day he will give up on Sam and start killing no matter if he's wearing Sam or Nick or anybody else. And on that day, I need to be there to stop him. If I'm not…"

Dean clenched his fists. He knew what was at stake. "Who says you can't be? Just bring my dad to the fight."

Michael frowned. "I would have thought you'd be against that."

"I am," Dean said like it was obvious. "But I can't very well stop you unless I volunteer instead and that would just defeat the whole purpose."

"I could and, if you never say yes, then I will have to," Michael said. "But it is destiny that you will say yes."

"You keep using that word," Dean said. "And I really don't think it means what you think it means."

Michael furrowed his eyebrows but said nothing. "I am not as strong in a vessel that is not you. I am strong enough for most things but not necessarily for killing Lucifer, particularly when he will be in his true vessel."

Dean slapped his hand down hard on his leg. "You don't know that!"

"It doesn't matter what either one of us believes," Michael said quietly. "My brother has his sights set on yours and he is very persuasive. Your brother has been groomed for this his whole life."

"He wouldn't do that."

"I think you know better," Michael said. "You don't have to say yes today. But one day, you know that you're going to have to. I understand that you do not want to. I can respect that. I won't want to, either. And you, at least, have the knowledge that your brother will be back once I kill Lucifer. My brother will stay gone for good."

"You don't have to do this."

"You know very well what will happen if I don't," Michael said. "Just think about that. I'm not your enemy, Dean."

* * *

Lucifer enjoyed the trapped look in Sam's eyes when he happened to glance over and see Lucifer standing in line two lanes over at the grocery store. He seemed to brace himself and took a step towards him but Lucifer just waved him off and indicated that they could talk after they got through the line. Looking thoroughly bemused, but also a bit relieved, Sam got back in line.

Once their respective purchases were made, Sam walked up to Lucifer.

"Okay, look, I know that there are far more important things for me to be thinking about but…what would the devil even buy at a grocery store?"

Lucifer showed Sam his bag.

"Bananas and popsicles?" Sam asked, his eyebrows shooting up.

"Do you have a problem with my grocery choices, Sam?"

"It's a little weird," Sam admitted.

"Well what should I get which would be less weird?" Lucifer asked. "Devil's food cake?"

Sam made a face. "That might be a little on the nose. I guess it's more weird that you're even grocery shopping in the first place. I know angels don't need to eat."

"Angels don't _need _to do much of anything," Lucifer said. "I could kill everyone in this grocery store but I thought you might take less of an issue with me merely shopping here."

"I do," Sam assured him. "But since when do you care about what I think?"

"Sam, I've always cared what you thought," Lucifer told him. "Even before you were born."

Sam rolled his eyes. "You don't care about me, Lucifer. You want to possess me."

"And I suppose that brother of yours isn't rather strongly attached to his car?" Lucifer asked rhetorically.

"Now I'm a car?"

"From what I understand, Gabriel did it first."

Sam reluctantly nodded. "Why are you even here?"

"I need you to say yes to me."

"I can't do that," Sam said patiently. "You'll only destroy the world if I do."

"I'm going to destroy the world regardless," Lucifer said. He cocked his head. "Well, to be more precise I'm going to destroy the human race. I like the rest of this world. It's my father's last great creation, you know, and oh so very beautiful. How arrogant of your people to view their destruction as the destruction of the whole planet."

Sam nodded. "Oh, yes. How arrogant of us."

Lucifer suspected Sam was implying something about angels and arrogance, perhaps him in particular, but it did not matter.

"I thought you said that it was inevitable that I would say yes," Sam said.

"And so it is."

"Then why are you even here?" Sam demanded. "If something is inevitable then it's going to happen whether you do anything at all."

"Inevitability is a tricky concept," Lucifer said slowly. "It is inevitable that you say yes and yet what would have happened if Anna had succeeded in killing you, killing your parents before you were born, and scattering their ashes so far apart that not even Michael could put any of you back together again?"

Sam choked and Lucifer peered curiously at him.

"I just…that would have actually worked?"

"Of course it would have," Lucifer said. "Why do you think Michael killed her?"

Sam looked down. "He lied to me," he whispered.

"Who did? Michael?"

Sam shook his head. "Cas."

"He told you it wouldn't have worked?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "Of course he did. He probably knew you'd be so self-sacrificing as to want to go along with it if you knew. His reasons for not wanting this to happen are different than mine, of course, since he also wishes to stop the apocalypse. You saying yes is inevitable and yet you couldn't have if Anna had succeeded. Go back to mythology. Oedipus was fated to kill his father and marry his mother. He tried to stop this by leaving home but I suppose he never knew he was adopted. How strange how often royalty adopts random children in mythology. Does the bloodline matter nothing to them? Perhaps nothing could have been done to prevent him from killing his father but he could have easily avoided marrying his mother. If nothing else, he could have just refused to marry anyone old enough to be his mother no matter how unlikely he found their connection. Inevitable and yet it could be thwarted."

"You're well-versed in human myths," Sam said warily.

Lucifer laughed. "Do you think I hate your people because I know nothing about them?"

"What about Paris?" Sam asked. "He was fated to destroy Troy. He was sent away as well and no one knew who he really was and he _still _managed to do it. Not single-handedly but you can make the case that if you could blame one person you could blame him."

"You don't blame Helen or Aphrodite?" Lucifer asked curiously.

Sam shook his head. "It wasn't Helen's fault. Whether she wanted to go with him or not, Paris wasn't going to leave without her. And she was magically forced to love him by Aphrodite which really creeps me out thinking about. As for Aphrodite, she was the one to offer him Helen when she was already married to the king of Sparta and wasn't consulted about this but it was only an offer. Paris is the one who took it and Paris should have cared more about Troy than Aphrodite did."

"I heard he didn't know who she was married to when he made his choice," Lucifer said.

"Well he certainly knew when he abducted her," Sam said unsympathetically.

"Personally I love the bit about how everyone knew he must be a noble because of his outstanding beauty and intelligence," Lucifer said. "Such conceit! As far as intelligence went, Paris could have easily avoided destroying Troy – at least in that way – if he _hadn't _run off with a queen. That's not even a hard one. But then, just because things do come to pass doesn't mean that there wasn't another way, just that that other way wasn't taken."

"That's a strange position to take for someone who is insisting that I have no choice but to say yes to you."

"I didn't say that," Lucifer corrected. "I said you will say yes to me."

"That's splitting hairs. And if I'm going to no matter what, why are you here?" Sam asked again.

"Well I need to do _something_," Lucifer admitted. "If I just sat around doing nothing and waiting for you to say yes to me then of course you never would."

"Thank you for the acknowledgement."

"As such, I visited you a few times and let you know of my intentions," Lucifer said. "And I decided not to waste time by proceeding with my plan to destroy humanity. I feel that method is bearing fruit and you're closer to saying yes than you were at the start but Michael is in a hurry and so I could either start killing more people and break your spirit that way or else try to have a civilized conversation with you. You're welcome."

"I'm not going to thank you for not massacring innocent people," Sam said flatly.

"Don't be ridiculous, Sam. There are no innocent humans," Lucifer said. "And you don't have to but that's not exactly the sort of positive reinforcement that might encourage me to keep trying."

"I don't _want_ you to keep trying, though."

"The next time I go out and kill an entire school or something, remember this conversation," Lucifer said seriously.

"You can't put this on me!"

"I just did," Lucifer said. "I'm going to keep doing all sorts of terrible things until you say yes."

Sam glared at him. "But you wouldn't stop if I did say yes!"

"Well, no," Lucifer admitted. "But you wouldn't have to be awake for that part."

"You're doing a terrible job of convincing me," Sam said.

Lucifer drew back, a little offended. "It's just a hard sell. Michael has it easy. All he has to say is 'help me save your world' and even he hasn't managed it! I need you to consent to helping me destroy it and somehow or other you don't see the merit of my plan."

"You do remember that I am human, right?"

Lucifer shrugged. "Nobody's perfect. You really should just say yes now, though. It would make it easier."

"I'm not exactly looking to make your destroying my people easier for you!"

"I wasn't talking about that," Lucifer said. "Although you're right, that would be much appreciated. I understand that you intend to be selfish about this."

"Self-" Sam broke off and shook his head. "Selfish? Are you kidding me?"

"It's your behavior, Sam. It shouldn't come as such a surprise to you."

"How can you possibly accuse me of being selfish when you're the one who wants to destroy my entire species? All I want to do is stop you!"

"Because _you _don't want me to destroy your species," Lucifer pointed out. "And, more to the point, you don't want me to use your body to do it. It's all about you."

"You are the most selfish creature I've ever met!" Sam burst out. "You won't even suffer to let us live because we're not perfect enough for you!"

"Sam, I've suffered greatly because of my dedication to cleansing the world of your filth," Lucifer said seriously. "I was betrayed by my brothers and cast out. I've spent more millennia completely alone in hell than you could fathom. How can you possibly think that I'm doing this for my own benefit?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "Look, just because you suffered doesn't mean that you're being noble and you clearly didn't learn a damn thing."

Lucifer smiled sadly at him. "I can accept that you feel that way."

Sam crossed his arms. "I'm not falling for it."

"Falling for what?"

"You want to destroy all of humanity. I don't care how sad you are, I'm not going to forget that and I'm not going to feel sorry for you."

"I don't want you to feel sorry for me," Lucifer said. "I want you to say yes to me. You're going to say yes to me, Sam. Maybe not today or anytime soon but eventually you're going to have to."

"And how, exactly, do you figure that?" Sam asked. He didn't want to admit it but it was obvious that, even if he wasn't willing to say yes today, he didn't have faith in his ability to keep saying no. Of course he didn't. He couldn't. "Bonus points if you can answer without using the word 'inevitable.'"

"It's your fault I'm out, Sam," Lucifer said simply. "Everything I've done, none of it would be possible without you. Oh, sure, your brother broke the first seal but he was being tortured down in hell! We can't really blame him for that, can we? You just wanted revenge. You betrayed the brother you were avenging to get it. I'm not complaining, mind you, I just want to make sure that you know that you have made all this possible."

"As if I could forget," Sam spat, his jaw tightening. "You seem to be leaving out a few crucial details."

Lucifer smiled, amused. "Oh, am I?"

"It wasn't just me going out and deciding to kill Lilith and not caring it freed you," Sam pointed out. "The angels let those seals fall. They brought it to the point where I only needed to kill Lilith to free you. They also chose not to revive me when I died and so let Dean sell his soul to go break the first seal."

"My brothers merely let it happen. You played the active role so I think we both know who bears the most blame," Lucifer said. "But I do so enjoy reminding them of their contributions to the cause."

"Azazel worked for years to make this happen. If my brother hadn't killed him he'd have kept right on working to free you. Lilith killed Dean and dangled his murder in front of me for a year. Even that night, when I didn't kill her right away, she egged me on."

"Since you're not sixteen anymore, you really should be able to just ignore people trying to provoke you," Lucifer said sagely.

"Lilith sent Ruby to me who spent two years doing nothing but earning my trust. She was…I hate her, now, for what she did but she was right when she said she was awesome. She played her part to perfection. She knew I wouldn't trust a demon easily so she made sure she was still hostile enough while helping up until Lilith dragged her back down to hell and she had extra motivation to turn on her. I never even questioned her reasons for wanting Lilith dead. And I needed someone and something and she was all that was there. I could have had Bobby or Jo or Ellen but I didn't want to see them. I didn't want to see anyone but she didn't give me that choice. And she didn't lie about me being able to kill Lilith. And the angels lied about Lilith's death and what they wanted and kept Dean from me once he knew and could have stopped me."

Lucifer let out a low whistle. "I must say, Sam, I am impressed. You do a remarkable job of blaming everyone else for your actions."

Sam's eyes flashed. "I know what I did. But you act like I single-handedly doomed the world."

Lucifer tilted his head. "That's because you did."

"All I did was free you and even if that was on me and me alone, you're the one who wants to destroy everyone."

"And you always knew that about me," Lucifer said. "I'm a very honest person."

Sam snorted.

Lucifer gave him a look. "I told you that I'd never lie to you, Sam. Have I broken that promise?"

"Maybe, maybe not," Sam said, shrugging. "But even if you haven't I still can't trust you."

Lucifer sighed. "And that is your choice."

"I know what I did," Sam said again. "But you can't put it all on me."

"You keep saying that but I know you don't believe it," Lucifer said mildly. "You know as well as I do that as much as I want to wipe humanity off the face of the Earth, I couldn't do anything stuck in that infernal cage. And as much as the angels and demons may have led you to water, you're the one who made the final decision. You chose a demon over your own brother and, being a little familiar with brotherly betrayal myself, I don't quite think he's forgiven you for that. He just knows he can't let you out of his sight or you'll come to me. But big brother can't babysit you forever."

"And what would have happened if I had chosen Dean instead?" Sam demanded. "I wasn't in my right mind. I was hopped up on demon blood! Apparently I literally had black eyes! If I had gone with Dean, we would have killed Lilith together and started the apocalypse that way. We never would have known."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night. You are going to say yes to me, Sam, because you made all this possible. You are going to say yes to me because I am not ever going to stop. I have all the time in the world and no one except your merry little band of misfits and maybe some jealous pagans who have their own ideas about how this world should end are even trying to stop me."

"The angels-"

"They want me defeated, yes," Lucifer agreed easily. "They're slaughtering my demons quite happily. But none of them would dare challenge me. Even your little Castiel is staying away. And they all know how they want this to go. Me against Michael. And Michael won't deign to enter the fray until that time. So really, by continuing to resist me you are condemning thousands of people to death. Millions, even."

"You'd kill everyone whether I was there or not," Sam said. "And I'm not the one doing the killing."

"Okay," Lucifer said, nodding. "So if Dean had come back from hell without his soul – it has been known to happen, you know – and began having no regard for saving people or collateral damage and killed innocents and you couldn't bear to kill him would you still say your hands were clean? Or at some point would you have to take responsibility for the results of your inaction?"

"This is different. I can't st-" Sam cut himself off.

Lucifer smiled. "You can't stop me? I know that although I see why you don't want to say it out loud given your little mission to save the world. You could, though. You could say yes."

"It wouldn't stop anything."

"It would lead to Dean saying yes," Lucifer said. "It would lead to the final showdown."

"Millions more would die! More than you've killed so far, more than you probably will kill anytime soon!"

"Don't tempt me," Lucifer warned. "I could start seriously attempting to wipe out your whole species _today _and until we have our vessels Michael won't stop me. It's only my regard for our battle and the fact I'm in no hurry and want to enjoy this that has stayed my hand so far."

"Fine," Sam ground out. "You could kill them all. But me saying yes wouldn't save anybody."

"It would if Michael won," Lucifer pointed out.

Sam started and stared at him with wide eyes.

"Oh, yes, I'm well-aware of the possibility and we've never truly fought seriously. When he cast me into hell…well, that's a complicated story and not one I feel like sharing. If you do nothing or if I win then the outcome is the same. But if you say yes then you give your species a chance. You give them Michael. And he may not have any great love for your people but he did promise to bring you and your family back and he is a man of his word. He will let whoever survives our fight live, if only to spite me and try and obey our missing father."

Sam swallowed a few times. "So it will be my fault if humanity is wiped out because Michael can't be bothered to stop you without Dean becoming his vessel? How is that supposed to be fair?"

"It's not," Lucifer said. "But it is what it is. So you can either say yes to hope or know you're dooming your species. And don't you have enough to answer for?"


	5. Chapter 5

Sam literally ran into the archangel Michael.

That probably wasn't the smartest thing to do but it wasn't exactly his fault! He was going on a morning run and the thing wearing his father's face and seeking to upgrade to his brother's appeared right in front of him.

If Michael had been human, Sam would have bowled him over but, as it stood, it was like running into a brick wall. And oh how Sam wished he didn't know exactly what that felt like.

Sam just sat there for a moment, breathing hard and staring at Michael before he climbed to his feet.

"Can I help you?" he asked cautiously. Dean would complain about him saying such a thing when they _knew _what the Archangels were after but Sam wasn't looking to get afflicted with stomach cancer before breakfast.

He glanced around to see if Lucifer was nearby.

"My brother isn't here right now," Michael said.

"Then why are you?" Sam asked. "Because if you think I'm going to help you convince Dean then-"

"That's not why I'm here," Michael interrupted. "Although if you do decide to help with your brother then I will be most thankful."

"Then why are you here?" Sam asked again.

"I need you to say yes to my brother," Michael replied.

Sam stared at him, unsure if he'd actually heard that right. "You want me to get possessed by your brother so you can kill him and me?"

"I would bring you right back," Michael assured him. "I did promise."

"I've actually died and been brought back before," Sam said. "And even if I ignore the fact that my being brought back was at the cost of Dean dying in a year and being dragged off to hell where he was forced to jumpstart the apocalypse, it was a rather…unpleasant experience that I have _no _wish to repeat."

Michael gave him an all-too-familiar disappointed look. "You mustn't be so selfish, Sam. Dying is hardly enjoyable but it will only be for a little while."

Sam felt a manic laugh bubbling up inside of him. "Really? Me? _I _mustn't be so selfish?"

"Yes," Michael agreed slowly, uncertain as to where he was going.

"You're the one who wants to destroy the planet because you and your brother can't work through your problems like normal people," Sam said. "And yeah, I know that me and Dean sometimes have to punch it out but the difference is that when _we _do it the only collateral damage is maybe trashing a room not a freaking planet!"

"How many times do I have to explain to you people that this is not what I want?" Michael demanded.

"You can explain it all you want," Sam said. "You can do nothing but explain it for the rest of your obscenely long life. But as long as you are making no effort to stop the apocalypse and just give lip service about how sad you are that you have to kill your brother, not even that you have to help destroy the planet just about your brother, then it's not going to be very convincing."

"I have no intention of destroying the planet," Michael said tiredly. "Will there be collateral damage? Yes. Will that collateral damage be better than just letting him destroy everything? You realize that even if I went to him now and attempted to make up, that might solve my family problems – though not in a way that would be right – but it would leave Lucifer free to destroy everything? _That _is what making peace with him would mean and don't pretend you don't know that."

"Fine," Sam bit out. "Say you're right. Say as long as Lucifer won't come around on humanity, something I'll concede is rather unlikely at this point, you have no choice but to fight him or else he'll destroy humans. Say that even matters to you because you're not very convincing on that front, that seems like just a side effect of Lucifer getting his way that you know Dean and I can't just let happen. That still doesn't explain why you're here right now attempting to get me to say yes to Lucifer."

"It has to happen, Sam," Michael told him.

Sam felt his annoyance flare up. "But that's the thing! It really doesn't. You spent all this time telling Dean he has to say yes or else he won't be able to save the world. Lucifer told me that if I don't say yes then Dean won't say yes then you won't be bothered to actually fight him and so, by helping Lucifer, I'll actually be saving the world. And all of that makes far more sense than I'm comfortable with. But here you are, trying to convince me to say yes to your brother. Is that because you want to stop him but you're truly too proud to help if your special predestined vessel refuses you? All that talk about doing the right thing and being the good son but if Dean won't play ball then you couldn't care less and are going to go sulk in your room?"

Michael's face was impassive. "It's not like that at all."

"Then why don't you tell me what it _is_ like," Sam challenged. "Tell me that Lucifer won't destroy the world until I say yes so I should say yes. Tell me that Lucifer will kill massive amounts of humans and may even wipe us out completely but he won't agree to fight you until he has me so you are absolutely powerless and can't force a confrontation yourself. Tell me how without possessing me he's weaker so either you'll have an added advantage in my brother or else be similarly handicapped and can't possibly just fight him now. Tell me why it helps anyone but Lucifer and his supporters and maybe you if you want everything to be perfect for your fight if I say yes to him."

"We made a deal," Michael said slowly. "You know this, Sam. We need our vessels because this is going to happen. And yes, I could just wait until the sheer inevitability of this hits you and you both consent but what good would that do? You'll never convince me that there's any point to doing this next week instead of right now. We both want this to be over. You want this to be over, too. We agreed that we would work together to speed the timeline up a little, is all. I am here to try and convince you because Lucifer is over trying to convince Dean. That is all."

"So because you made a promise you have to try and help Lucifer in his goal of destroying the world," Sam said flatly. "See, it's things like this that make us not accept you as the good guy here."

"Does my word mean so little to you that you believe it should so easily be broken?" Michael demanded, affronted.

Sam thought about that. "Yes. Your word means literally nothing to me."

"Well it means something to everyone else," Michael said. "I am bound by it."

"I highly doubt you mean that literally and if you end up promising to do something really evil that's really no excuse for actually doing it. And helping Lucifer in this is evil. Helping him, I don't know, move or something might not be so evil. Assuming that didn't involve genocide but it seems to do that a lot when it comes to him. But even if you have no choice but to keep your promises, no one held a gun to your head and forced you to promise to help him."

"So tell me, Sam, if I am not the good guy then who is? Certainly not Lucifer if I lose my good guy status for working with him in such a limited capacity," Michael said.

Sam couldn't help but laugh at that. "Really? You think that's why you're not the good guy? No, you're not the good guy because none of you give a damn about humanity and the only angels we've met who did were fallen. And…possibly Gabriel, I really don't know about him."

"None of us _really _know about him," Michael admitted.

"It would be one thing if you didn't give a damn about us and just stayed up in heaven, leaving us alone. I might even be able to still call you the good guys if you stayed out of it when Azazel freed Lilith and then she dragged Dean down to hell. But the minute you refused to save him until he broke the first seal? That's a problem."

"It wasn't like that," Michael argued.

"Then what? Are you seriously telling me that, as much as you wanted this apocalypse, you went for Dean's soul the moment he was sent to hell and it just literally took you forty years to succeed? I'm banking it actually just took the ten Dean was down there after breaking the seal. Would you have taken him if he hadn't broken the seal yet?"

Michael set his jaw. "There is a difference between doing good and going against destiny. Going against the will of my father, no matter how much pain or death it may avert, is never the good option."

"I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree on that one," Sam said, knowing that there was very little point in arguing about destiny with someone like this. It would be like beating his head against a wall where he tried to make the archangel understand that bad things were bad things and 'but it is destiny' is really no kind of a defense. "Just so you know, doing something that would be good just because destiny says so or you were ordered to doesn't make it good."

"Then what is it?" Michael challenged. "Evil?"

Sam shook his head. "No, take Cas pulling Dean out of hell. That was a good thing. But he only did it because he was commanded to. That wasn't good of him. Following your orders to save seals wasn't good of him. Ignoring orders to help Dean, trying to warn him about your plan, falling to save Dean, to save all of us…_that _was good. When he chose to do it because it was right and not just because he's a good little soldier. You paint yourself as some kind of hero because you're going to stop Lucifer from destroying the world? Well, aside from the fact you've been enabling him like crazy, you're only following orders, too. Or at least that's what you've convinced yourself of. I really wouldn't know one way or another."

"No, you wouldn't," Michael said coldly. "Whatever I have done has been for the best."

"So you say. But you might think that things like actively sabotaging the attempts to save the seals, whatever you did there, is just 'speeding up the timeline' but if it's truly inevitable you shouldn't have to do any work for the apocalypse to happen. If it's truly inevitable, you could have killed Lilith before the first seal broke and Lucifer would still be freed eventually. That's what inevitability means."

Michael looked annoyed. "I can't just stop destiny, Sam. That would be disobeying my father's wishes and that is the one thing that I will never, _ever_ do."

"We really need to talk about how your understanding of the words 'destiny' and 'inevitable' is seriously flawed," Sam muttered, shaking his head. "But now's not the time. Even if you didn't stop them but just…let them breaking the seals take as long as it should have taken without your cooperation, it would have happened. Maybe it should have taken Lilith ten years and not just one. I never figured out how I was let loose from the panic room the night I killed Lilith but all I know is we warded as heavily as we could against demons but not at all against angels. But even if that wasn't you guys, how do you know that God's plan wasn't that the apocalypse would happen in 2020 and not 2010?"

"It's been thousands of years," Michael said simply. "Ten will not matter one way or another. It had to be during your lifetimes and that really narrows the timeline down."

"You were never going to convince me, you know," Sam said tiredly. "Your whole 'I'm trying to save the world so say yes and help my brother who wants to destroy it' tactic just falls flat and you know that Lucifer isn't going to be making any headway on Dean."

"That's fine," Michael said calmly. "You don't have to be convinced today. We have time."

* * *

Lucifer looked down at his shirt, which now had six bullet holes in it. "Really, Dean?"

"Yes, really," Dean said, putting his gun down and crossing his arms.

"Why in the world would you shoot me?"

"Would you like a list?" Dean asked as politely as he could manage, which probably actually wasn't all that much.

"Yes, yes, you hate me and I'm the epitome of evil and all of that."

"You got Jo and Ellen killed," Dean accused.

Lucifer blinked. "Who?"

Dean reached for his gun again.

"Oh, calm down, Rambo," Lucifer said, rolling his eyes. It was still rather alarming to hear angels make pop culture references though even Castiel had been getting better at that. "I kill a lot of people, you know. And if shooting me with the Colt didn't do more than…well, actually, that did really hurt but it left me nowhere near dead so why would you think shooting me with regular bullets would work?"

"There's just something so _satisfying _about shooting Satan, you know?"

"I can't say that I do," Lucifer replied. "It must be a human thing."

"If it is then you guys are seriously missing out," Dean said. "Now what are you doing here? Not that I want you to go harassing my brother or anything but, well, Sam's not here."

"I know," Lucifer said. "Michael and I agreed to meet with the other's vessel to try and get a better understanding of them. And, I suppose, try and convince them to say yes but I don't hold out much hope on that front. Not like this. My brother is impatient, though."

Dean's brow furrowed. "So Michael's over there with Sam?"

"Would you feel better if he were over there with me?" Lucifer asked.

Dean just scowled at him. "I don't know what you think you're going to accomplish here but, I assure you, you're not going to."

"You don't know that."

"Yeah, I do."

"You can guess," Lucifer said. "You can stop me from getting a yes from you today, certainly. But what if I were just here to talk to you, as I already said that I was? I'm doing that right now and good luck trying to ignore me. It's a…rather _difficult_ prospect."

Dean decided then and there he didn't want to find out what Lucifer meant by that. Besides, all that higher road crap was more Sam's bag than his. "Do you seriously have nothing better to do with your time than annoy me?"

Lucifer put on an exaggeratedly thoughtful face. "Well I could be off killing humans. That would probably be more productive. But do you really think that my life needs to be all work, all the time? What would even be the point of living if I had to live like that? And anyway, you and your brother gave up even pretending to try and stop this from happening when you went to that concert last night."

"And I have no regrets about doing that," Dean said. "So what is coming here to talk to me about if not work?"

"I guess…family?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "I promised Michael I would just like he promised he'd go and see Sam."

"So the devil is doing something because he promised he would," Dean said, his voice dripping with incredulity.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes. "I am not a liar, Dean. I don't need to be."

"You realize that you saying that is not actually proof that that's true, right?" Dean asked.

"I've been very upfront about my plans for this planet and for your brother," Lucifer said. "What could I possibly be lying about?"

"Any number of things," Dean said. "Was what's-his-face a Satanist or did you have to lie to him to get consent? Or would you consider torture without actually lying good enough? Because I'd call that actually much worse than lying."

"I didn't lie to Nick," Lucifer said calmly. "Humans had just murdered his wife and baby girl. I just told him I wanted vengeance against God and he came around pretty quickly. Honestly, I don't believe he was in a very good place at the time."

"Taking advantage of someone that vulnerable and grieving is despicable," Dean spat.

"But it is not lying," Lucifer pointed out. "Nor am I lying to you about it."

"You know what, I don't give a damn whether you lie or not," Dean said. "Though, for the record, I'll never believe that you don't. You promised Michael that you had to be here and you two are such buddies and you're such a paragon of virtue that you're here."

"Michael and I are not 'buddies'," Lucifer said distastefully.

"Could have fooled me. You two are awfully close," Dean said. "Which is all sorts of weird considering everything."

"You really think I don't know that?" Lucifer asked.

Dean shrugged. "You don't seem to have a problem with it at any rate. Then again, you also have no problem committing mass genocide because we're not perfect – not like you guys are either – so your judgment is a bit skewed, isn't is?"

"Why do you have a problem with it?" Lucifer asked. "What difference could it possibly make to you?"

"Am I seriously being asked how Lucifer and Michael teaming up to try and get Sam and I to agree to be angelic meat suits in a winner-take-all battle for the future of the Earth when neither side gives a damn about Earth's current occupants affects me?" Dean asked the world at large, staring at the ceiling.

"Is me giving Sam my undivided attention while you contend with Michael really that much better than this?" Lucifer asked. "You don't want us anywhere near you anyway."

"Which just goes to show you two are not really up on this whole 'consent' thing," Dean said.

Lucifer smiled and Dean suppressed a shiver. "I need consent to wear your brother. I do not need consent for literally anything else."

"Can you go now?" Dean demanded. "You met me, I'm sure you've got a read on me, what more do you possibly need?"

"Need?" Lucifer repeated. "I don't really _need _anything. But I suppose I should suggest that you join Michael."

"Why?" Dean challenged. "Because you know that as long as I'm around there's no way that Sam will say yes to you?"

Lucifer gave a very put-upon sigh. "Do you really think so little of me as to think that I need to conspire to get you out of the way before Sam will say yes?"

Dean glared at him. "I've seen some messed-up version of the future where that's exactly what happened." He paused. "Although to be fair, that might have just been Zachariah trying to get me to say yes to Michael. But we both know you'll have an easier time with me gone and it's not like you can just kill me."

"No, I suppose there's little point in that since Michael would eventually need to bring you back to life in order to get your consent," Lucifer mused. "And if I put him behind schedule by working on Sam while you were dead, not that he wouldn't be able to immediately return you to life, he would be very…difficult. He's difficult in the best of situations and I don't want to add to that."

Dean wondered what it said about him that he could be so unfazed in the face of such a blatant threat. Probably that he spent too much time hanging out with goddamn angels. Even Castiel had threatened to send him back to hell at one point!

"But really, Dean, I'm surprised at you. You don't think that Michael and I can just separate you two?"

Dean's head jerked up. "You can't-"

"We can't find you as easily as we'd like, no," Lucifer interrupted. "Those pesky sigils. But we have all the time in the world to look and we're clearly not having any sort of problem finding you eventually if these little chats are any indication."

"Just leave us alone."

"You know we can't do that," Lucifer said, sounding almost sympathetic.

"Weren't you going off on personal responsibility not that long ago?" Dean demanded. "Why don't you show some now and admit that you just don't want to."

Lucifer was quiet for a moment and Dean hoped that he hadn't gone too far. He still wouldn't regret what he said and he wasn't exactly the type to back down just because the other party held all the power but he wasn't exactly looking forward to losing an arm or something.

"No, you're right," Lucifer mused. "And I have no real reason to deny it. I don't _have _to destroy humanity. I'm not Michael, bound by what he perceives as his destiny. I do have to kill him, though, if only because he'll kill me otherwise but if I chose to I could give up my crusade and I know that Michael wouldn't be able to kill me if I refused to fight him."

"Then why don't you?" Dean demanded. "Why all of this?"

"Do you really think that I spent thousands of years locked in the bowels of hell, only able to communicate via nun massacre just to say I'm sorry and change my tune?" Lucifer asked silkily.

"I'd like to say 'yes'," Dean said weakly.

"Well you'd be wrong. If there was ever _any _chance of me changing my mind, any chance of me deciding to let the little diseased maggots live then that chance died when I was imprisoned and left to rot," Lucifer said, almost mildly. "Once I was kicked out of heaven, once I was banished to hell, that became who I was. I was the one who wanted to destroy humans. And the way I see it, it all became about you. If I gave up then I was imprisoned to save your species. I hope you'll understand why I'd rather have my imprisonment be about finally getting to wipe your _filth_ from this planet once and for all."

"You say this is about us," Dean shot back. "But in the end every word you're saying makes it more obvious that you're actually talking about your family. What's so imperfect about our species anyway? We have short lifespans? Plenty of animals have shorter ones and you don't seem to take it personally. We kill each other? You should've heard what your buddy Uriel got up to. Michael went and killed Anna and the whole point of this is for you or him to kill the other. We hurt each other? What exactly did you guys do to Anna that got her to the point where she thought her best option was killing Sam and then killing our parents? Zachariah gave me stage four stomach cancer and somehow took Sam's lungs without killing him. Since Bobby stabbed himself in the front and Zachariah threatened he'd never walk again if I said no, I'm pretty sure that's his fault, too. You hate that we can become demons? Well guess who created them! Any evil that we're capable of, any of it, you guys are capable of it, too. I've seen it."

"Lucky for me I'm not looking to convert you then, Dean," Lucifer said dryly.

"Well you're not convincing me that you're misunderstood or that I should join up with you or anything, that's for damn sure," Dean snapped.

"I'm perfectly fine with you thinking that," Lucifer said calmly. "You're a human and cannot be expected to understand just how repugnant you are. And I don't need you on my side. I'm not here to persuade you of anything, really, just stopping by to get to know you better. I almost wouldn't mention it but, in the interest of fairness, I really should just tell you."

"Tell me what?" Dean asked suspiciously.

"Every terrible thing you think about me…I won't waste my breath trying to convince you otherwise. Michael's not half as eager to fight me as he seems to think. If the humans he's trying to save won't even let him use one of their body's to save the planet…well. Save the world, don't save the world."

"Let me guess," Dean said sarcastically. "All of that's up to me."

Lucifer looked surprised. "No, of course not. It's really up to Michael. What could _you _do? But getting Michael to the playing field? That one's kind of on you. So go ahead, continue saying no. I don't mind. I'll destroy the world no matter who I'm wearing. But enjoy your apocalypse."

* * *

There were less likely angels to suddenly appear before him in heaven than Gabriel. Lucifer, for instance. Or Castiel. Any of the dead ones. But Gabriel was still pretty high up there on the unexpected appearances scale.

"So," Gabriel said casually as if he hadn't been missing and presumed dead for thousands of years. As if he hadn't abandoned them all and never looked back. "I've got to know. What is going on with Michael and Lucifer?"

"Gabriel," Raphael said stiffly. "I see that you yet live."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Well of course I do. What did you think? There's not a lot that can kill me."

"Not as an angel, perhaps," Raphael said.

Another eye-roll. "What, did you think I tore out my grace or something? I was looking for a get-away, not to destroy everything that makes me me and give myself amnesia. I mean, seriously, could you see me as a human being?" He shook his head. "Death first."

"Father is dead," Raphael said. "So why not you?"

"Is he? Since when?" Gabriel said. "You seriously have no faith in anyone's survival skills, do you? I'm not even sure Death himself could reap Father but if he can then he's the only one. He's fine."

"Then where is He?"

"Couldn't tell you," Gabriel said flippantly. "Man's a bit of a deadbeat. Not that I have much room to talk, I suppose, but I'm here now."

"Only after Michael and Lucifer found you," Raphael pointed out.

Gabriel laughed. "Well, yeah, what did you expect? The pre-game warm-up for the apocalypse is not exactly the best time to be doing the whole reunion thing. Although I suppose if not now then when for at least one of them. Maybe they'd even take each other out. Hey, if they manage to kill each other what happens with Earth?"

"I honestly couldn't care less," Raphael said. "But it would probably fall to me to figure out what to do. I wouldn't let Lucifer's grubby little demons have their way with it."

"No, you'd probably follow Michael's plan, what else is new," Gabriel said almost thoughtfully. "So, what, it probably mostly gets destroyed but you'd preserve what's left, call it paradise, and pretend to be happy."

"Gabriel, what are you doing here?"

Gabriel looked surprised though Raphael honestly had no idea if it was real or an act. It had been too long and he hadn't understood his brother very well by the end anyway. He had never thought that he would…

"I told you. I am here to find out what Michael and Lucifer are even doing," Gabriel said.

"And…what? You made me think you were dead-"

"I didn't _make _you do anything," Gabriel interrupted. "We already discussed why you shouldn't have believed I left. I left, I didn't fake my death or anything, and you assumed everything else."

"You left without a word. You wouldn't be here now if they hadn't tracked you down. And now you just want to pretend like nothing happened and get answers from me?"

"Well what else am I supposed to do?" Gabriel demanded. "Grovel? Raphael, I did what I had to do and I don't see why I should apologize for that."

"You didn't have to do anything, Gabriel. You just chose to."

"It wasn't my fight."

"Of course it was!" Raphael exclaimed. "It was Michael against Lucifer and the entirety of heaven was drawn in. You had to know you couldn't stay neutral up here or you would have stayed."

"I didn't want to fight. I wouldn't kill another angel."

"And you think _I _wanted it?" Raphael demanded. "I haven't spoken to him in some time and I do not know exactly what he has become but I do not even believe that Lucifer _wanted _to fight with us. It's just that he wanted to have his own way more."

"It was Michael's issue and Lucifer's issue and back then I didn't care enough about humanity to think that their fate was worth entering the fray. Not that it's even really about that, anyway. It had nothing to do with me."

"Your family self-destructing and it had nothing to do with you?" Raphael's voice was dripping with disdain. "How selfish can you be, Gabriel?"

"How selfish can _they _be?" Gabriel countered. "Everything was fine until Lucifer decided that humans were a blight upon the galaxy that had to be destroyed. And fine, maybe I didn't exactly like being asked to bow down to them either but it was a symbolic gesture and over in an instant. Everyone else managed it. Lucifer just couldn't swallow his pride long enough to humor Father and that's really all he asked, he knew no one really cared for humanity. And then Michael couldn't let Lucifer's defiance go and before you knew it we had death and destruction and all those things Lucifer said he hated humanity for. He may have had a point about them being worse than us _before_ he started this but after…now it's more like he just can't stand to admit he was wrong."

"You won't find me defending Lucifer," Raphael replied. "Though, whether you feel his hatred of humans makes sense or not, I do believe that he still means it. All that time being imprisoned would not have endeared them to him. Michael, though? You seriously expected him to just defy father and equate that to Lucifer's little tantrum?"

"He has a lot to answer for."

"Who doesn't?" Raphael countered. "At least he stayed and tried to fix the problem."

"I'm not here to argue about them," Gabriel said. "There was little point arguing with Michael and I know I'm not going to talk you out of supporting him."

"No," Raphael agreed. "_You _couldn't. I could stay. I didn't want to stay. I didn't want to fight. But I did and it wasn't my fight any more than it was yours. You can tell our brothers all you want how you just got caught up in their squabble but you know that I was in the exact same position as you and I managed to be there when our family needed me. I didn't run away and hide."

"No, that…that is true," Gabriel admitted reluctantly. "But I can't change what happened. Am I really supposed to be penitent because I can't change the past?"

Raphael's annoyance flared up at that. "It's not about being unable to change the past, Gabriel. It's about the consequences of your actions. You may not be able to go back and change what you did but would you really even want to except you don't like that people are holding it against you? You sill made the choice."

Gabriel closed his eyes and sighed. "You know, it's things like that that would give Lucifer literally no incentive to stop this. Say he stopped right now, say he admitted he was wrong about everything. If no one lets him change, what's going to persuade him to do so?"

"Changing isn't about _letting _people do it. You don't need permission," Raphael said fiercely. "Just because someone has decided to change does _not _entitle them to forgiveness or mean that everyone must immediately pretend that all the wrongs they have committed haven't happened. Will that make people less inclined to change? Perhaps but it also shows they didn't really mean it enough in the first place. Changing does not erase past ills. We both know, whether or not Michael will admit it to himself, that if Lucifer wants to come home he will struggle against what he believes his destiny to be but he will ultimately let him. But this isn't about him, it's about you. You left and you cannot pretend that didn't happen no matter how inconvenient that is for you."

"I can't tell you why you could watch all the killing, why you could even help with the killing, and I couldn't," Gabriel said. "I don't know why the lesser angels could, either. Maybe they were more used to following orders that didn't come from Dad. Maybe it was easier for them to buy into what Michael was saying about Lucifer being a monster because they didn't know him like I did. Maybe you're stronger than I am. Maybe I care more than you do. I tried to stay. I stayed long after I first thought to flee. But ultimately I couldn't do it. And I stand by my decision to go. It was what I needed to do at the time. But I can't run anymore, our brothers and their vessels have removed that option. So I'm here but I'm not going to fight and that's just going to have to be enough. I won't apologize for that but…I am sorry that my choices hurt you. I never wanted to make the situation worse."

"Well you did," Raphael said flatly. "And your words can't change that."

"I never expected them to," Gabriel said. "You'll forgive me eventually."

"Not today."

Gabriel nodded. "I can wait. But, in the meantime, can you please tell me what Michael and Lucifer are thinking?"

"I'm sure I couldn't even begin to tell you what Lucifer is thinking," Raphael said. "I heard that you met with him recently and I have not seen him since…before. I only know what Michael has said."

"Well tell me _something _because I really don't understand any of this."

"Didn't they tell you?" Raphael asked rhetorically. "I was not under the impression that they were keeping it some great secret."

Gabriel made a face. "They told me that Sam and Dean won't play ball so therefore they decided to come together and convince them so that they can go murder each other the way God intended."

"There you go then."

"But I mean, it's just…"

"A little bit ridiculous?"

"Yes!" Gabriel burst out. "How do they not? How can they want to…how can…Do they really think this is a good idea?"

"Evidently or they wouldn't be doing it," Raphael said dryly.

"I'm serious, what are they thinking?"

"Michael seems to genuinely not see anything strange about it," Raphael said. "I do think he has a point that it doesn't matter how weird everyone else finds it because it does have a practical purpose. Neither of them are having luck with their vessels on their own and theoretically if they work together they could get Sam and Dean to say yes faster."

"And then they'll get to move right on to killing each other. That _really _doesn't bother them? I mean, forget about it being weird. He's right, who cares what anyone else thinks? But they haven't spoken in thousands of years. They left things pretty bad between them and they know they're going to have to kill each other. Or, well, they know they're going to choose to kill each other. There's no one save Daddy himself either of them cares about more. That sounds like a recipe for disaster."

"I don't know why Lucifer agreed," Raphael said. "But Michael believes that all that matters is his duty and I believe he is underestimating how much spending time with Lucifer will affect him. I…" he hesitated.

"What?"

"I do not know if I should say it."

"If you're concerned about him, you know I'll be concerned, too," Gabriel said. "I'm not about to go tattle that you don't think he's making the best decision."

"He knows of my reservations regarding this plan," Raphael said. "Ever since Father died, Michael's tried to do his duty but it's difficult to extrapolate what Father _would _have wanted when the situation becomes unlike what was expected when He was here. Michael is so certain he needs to kill Lucifer and, with how things stand, I don't disagree. But if they start bonding again…Michael will always do his duty but will he even know what that is? And if he does carry through killing Lucifer, what's going to happen to him after that? I was worried before they began working together and it will only be worse now that they're actually spending time together."

"Killing Lucifer won't be easy for him," Gabriel said sympathetically. "We are assuming, then, that Michael will win?"

"I certainly am assuming that," Raphael said. "Though I suppose it is not a sure thing. Michael is stronger than Lucifer but Lucifer knows that and the odds of him making it a fair fight are not worth considering. Lucifer knows all sorts of dirty tricks Michael would never see coming and if he were to pretend to repent, to get Michael to drop his guard, then to go after him…I could not let Michael's murder go. Even if he walks into that battle, fully prepared to die if necessary, I could not do it. I don't imagine I could actually stop Lucifer but I would need to try. I could never watch him win."

"And so-so what?" Gabriel asked frowning and moving his arms restlessly. "If Michael dies you'll just make the situation worse? With their stubbornness it is almost inevitable that we have to lose one of them. You'd make us lose you, too? What were you saying about my selfishness earlier? I just left. _You _want to die."

"I want nothing of the sort and, as I told you, I do not expect Michael to fail. It would just be foolish not to consider every possibility, particularly as there are only two," Raphael said calmly. "What was it that _you _said to me? You had to do what was best for you?"

"Killing yourself-"

"I wouldn't be killing myself, I would be going into a situation where I knew I would probably die," Raphael interrupted.

"Doing that is never the best choice for anybody!"

"You don't get to make that choice for someone else," Raphael said. "And since I would be dead, clearly I would be the one suffering more – or ceasing to suffer as the case may be – than you since you would merely not have my presence after my death. And given how perfectly comfortable you were not having me all this time, I find your sudden concern falls a little flat."

"I was _always _concerned, Raphael!" Gabriel insisted. "I just knew you were fine."

"Fine?" Raphael echoed, laughing harshly. "Is that what you want to call the aftermath of Lucifer's imprisonment? Although I suppose you wouldn't know any better, you made it a point not to be there. You didn't come back when the fighting ended."

"It wasn't over," Gabriel said tiredly. "It was just a break in it. And no matter how long the break lasted, I knew it would eventually lead back to this."

"I don't know why you're here," Raphael said. "Whatever madness it is that has led to Michael and Lucifer together again, it will not change what is coming."

"But what if it could?" Gabriel asked, suddenly earnest. "They've spent all this time fighting and not talking and forgetting how much they care about each other. Now suddenly they have to work together towards a common aim again! Now they're talking and bantering and maybe they'll even get a chance to work out their issues."

"Do you really think that there is a chance that they'll be able to just put aside their issues?" Raphael asked skeptically. "The stakes are a little bit higher than them simply having a personality conflict."

"They really aren't, though," Gabriel argued. "I mean, yes, I am highly concerned about the fate of humanity but they're not. I mean, Michael thinks he really shouldn't just let Lucifer destroy it and Lucifer still doesn't want to suffer them to live or whatever but Michael feels Lucifer betrayed him when he broke away from Dad and started a war-"

"Lucifer _did _betray us."

"And Lucifer feels betrayed Michael wouldn't stand with him against Dad."

"Which is ridiculous."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "No need to question what side _you're _on. But if they can just sort that out and forgive each other I can't imagine that they'll let a little thing like whether to destroy the world or not drive them apart again." He cocked his head. "That sounds very strange but, well, it's our brothers."

"And what if that does happen but Michael decides to let Lucifer have his way with the humans?"

"It could happen," Gabriel admitted. "Frankly, I'm kind of counting on Lucifer being more willing to bend on his anti-human stance than Michael being willing to stop at least nominally protecting Father's last creation like he told us to."

"I can't see Lucifer changing his mind either," Raphael said. He did, however, think Gabriel was right about Michael. Clinging to their father's last orders was all he had. "They're not just going to forget everything that happened."

"They don't have to. They just have to be willing to honestly talk about their problems and, given what is to come, I can't imagine their issues won't come up all the time. They kept going at it when they came by to see me. And if they can restrain themselves from their fights getting physical, they might actually make some progress. And then they might find out it's not as easy to kill the other as they seem to think. And then we might actually have a chance of stopping this thing."

"You forget that I have no interest in stopping this," Raphael said.

"Not even to protect Michael from having to die or kill Lucifer?"

Raphael narrowed his eyes. That was a low blow and Gabriel knew it. "They won't change. Michael can't as long as Lucifer insists on doing what he's doing and Lucifer is far too proud to be willing to back down. It would make everything he has done and gone through his rebellion utterly pointless. You don't want to have to be penitent? Lucifer will _die _before he comes begging for forgiveness."

"It could happen."

"Just add that to the list of harsh realities you refuse to face."


	6. Chapter 6

After a day when Sam and Dean, between them, slipped on 47 banana peels even though they hadn't actually seen a banana all day, they really weren't surprised when Gabriel showed up after dinner.

"I'm mad at you," he said matter-of-factly.

Dean gave him an unimpressed look. "No shit."

Sam sighed. "What did we do to offend you? This isn't about us figuring out who you were, is it? Because we didn't _have _to let you go and that was months ago."

"No, no," Gabriel assured them. "Although, for the record, I am still a bit miffed about that. Thousands of years of nobody having any idea who I was and then you two bozos meet me, what, three times and you've worked it out."

Dean shrugged. "Don't talk about your family dysfunction around a couple of experts next time."

"So what is wrong?" Sam asked. "We haven't even seen you since then. And since you're the one who killed Dean a thousand times and tried to force us to agree to play ball with your asshole brothers, I don't think you really have any room to be mad at us."

Gabriel spread his hands and looked surprisingly innocent given what they knew about him. "I really don't see what one has to do with the other. And the reason I'm mad at you and you deserve _so _much worse than all of this is because you up and told Lucifer about me!"

"I did not!" Sam protested.

Gabriel raised an eyebrow at him. "Really?"

"Why would I even do that?" Sam wondered.

Gabriel shrugged. "To get back at me? To force me to finally pick a side and hope it's yours? Because my brother can be really kind of terrifying?"

"He didn't," Dean said firmly.

Gabriel nodded. "Because you would know and it's not like Lucifer ever got your brother alone."

Dean just glared at him.

"What happened with Lucifer? He found you?" Sam asked.

Gabriel snorted. "Like you don't know."

"Let's just assume I don't," Sam said. "And even if I had told him, which I didn't, it still wouldn't mean that I knew what happened after that."

"Michael and Lucifer showed up, together no less, and wanted to have a reunion. They insisted that, despite my very successful career of staying out of their drama, I can't possibly stay neutral and need to pick a side. I refused and they decided to humor me."

"Well that's, uh, good, right?" Dean asked uncertainly. "It's better than most people who have run into them have fared and frankly it's better than I would have expected given you up and ditched them."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Of course it's not good! My brothers found me! If I wanted them to find me but just sort of humor me about the whole not killing each other thing then I wouldn't have had to go into hiding in the first place!"

"We're actually not convinced you had to do that," Dean said.

"Well, I did," Gabriel insisted. "And Lucifer said he found out from you."

"You may not be aware of this," Sam said, "especially because of how honest Lucifer insists that he is but he lies all the time. About everything."

Gabriel laughed. "I had heard a rumor but Lucifer swore it was a vicious lie."

"But you believe him about Sam."

Gabriel shrugged. "Look at it this way. Lucifer has much better things to do than hunt me down even if he apparently has time to go chat up Michael. The two of them were always kind of up each other's asses. Lucifer hasn't even been out that long and Michael and Raphael were vaguely looking for me ever since I left. No one has found out who I was in literally thousands of years! Nobody even knew where to look and some people, mostly Raphael, thought I was dead. And yet somehow, just a few weeks after you two work it out, I get harassed by the fam? Forgive me if I'm willing to entertain the idea that it really is all Sam's fault."

"But…I didn't tell him anything!" Sam protested.

Gabriel looked skeptical. "You must have given him _something_."

"I just…" Sam thought back. "He brought you up, I think. Maybe asked if we'd met you? But Dean said something about Raphael and I didn't even respond to what he said!"

Gabriel frowned thoughtfully. "I suppose I can accept that he was reading your mind."

"Good."

"I don't suppose you feel like apologizing for all the crap you put us through today, do you?" Dean asked rhetorically.

Gabriel shook his head. "Not really."

"Even though we were innocent of what you thought we did?" Sam asked.

"Thought _you _did," Dean corrected. "I don't know why I was included in this at all, especially since it's not as though Gabriel is cool with us lumping him in with his brothers."

"Well, the way I look at it it was still pretty much your fault," Gabriel said. "Maybe not your choice but, come on. We're all still blaming you for letting Lucifer out of the cage, aren't we, and there was literally no way you could have possibly known about that." He brightened. "Oh, excellent!"

"What-" Dean started to say when Castiel appeared in the room.

Gabriel moved too fast to see and there he was, arm slung around a very stiff Castiel's shoulders. "We'll catch you two later."

With that, he was gone.

"Fuck," Dean said eloquently.

* * *

As soon as he could manage it, Castiel wriggled his way out of Gabriel's hold.

"What are you doing here, Gabriel?" he demanded. "If you are trying to persuade Sam and Dean then you're wasting your time. Michael and Lucifer are already doing their best and the Winchesters will not be persuaded."

"I wish I was as certain of that as you seem to be," Gabriel muttered. "I stopped by to yell at them for telling Lucifer about me but it turns out that Lucifer probably just read their minds. Either way, it's annoying but I suppose I've put them through enough for the crime of having penetrable minds."

"Gabriel."

"What?" Gabriel asked innocently. "But listen, while I have you could you tell me what's been going on? Michael and Lucifer just said they were working together to try and persuade our boys but, well, they do not appear all that persuaded to me."

"No, they are not," Castiel agreed. "I do not see how they could persuade them since they both want to destroy the world and Sam and Dean will not help them."

Gabriel shrugged. "They can be persuasive."

"That remains to be seen," Castiel said, unimpressed.

"Yeah, this is a bit of a tough sell," Gabriel admitted.

"And are you here on their business?"

"Didn't I already tell you I don't get what's going on?"

"You did," Castiel agreed, "but you could have been lying. Or at least supporting them while not fully understanding their aims. Or perhaps you are attempting to get information or just think this is funny."

"Well, I'm not."

Castiel stared at him.

"Yeah, that's not exactly convincing, is it?" Gabriel said. "You'll just have to trust me."

Castiel continued to stare at him. "Under the circumstances, I find that to be a difficult prospect."

"So I trapped you in another dimension and then trapped you in a worse dimension when you escaped the first time," Gabriel said. "And so I was pestering them into saying yes and beginning the apocalypse. Well, it's already begun technically but not really and the point is that you need to stop worrying so much about what I may or may not have done in the past and move on with your life."

"You've given me no reason to."

"Well now that I need to get involved-"

"Why would you need to get involved?" Castiel asked. "Just because you have been found, you could always go back into hiding or just refuse to get involved. They cannot make you and I doubt that they would kill you over something like that."

"Well maybe I don't _want _to go back into hiding," Gabriel said.

"Then that is your choice but you could still stay neutral by doing that. Are they attempting to force you to choose a side?"

"Eh, yes and no," Gabriel said. "They're willing to try and wait me out and it's kind of insulting. I'm not changing my mind on this."

"But even if they're just counting on you changing your mind, they are still willing to let you stay out of it," Castiel pointed out. "I don't understand why you are acting as though your neutrality is no longer a possibility."

"If they know who I am then, even if they say they will wait for me to choose their side, I can't just not be involved. I can't know them and talk to them and not be involved. And if they know who I am then I cannot stay away and if I don't stay away then I need to get involved and I'm not getting involved. Why do you think I ran all those years ago?"

"You _can _stay and not get involved," Castiel said. "It would be the easiest thing in the world. Be in heaven. Be on Earth. Don't fight anyone."

"Ah, but that's like choosing someone's side by default," Gabriel explained. "I don't really want to chill with the demons any more than Lucifer does but spending time with any angels that aren't him, and most of them are not, is like choosing heaven. They're really going to look at anything I do and try to find a side for me and I am just not interested."

"But you are still in favor of the apocalypse," Castiel said curiously.

Gabriel shrugged. "More sure of its inevitability and sick of all the build-up. What are Michael and Lucifer doing? Come on, Castiel, tell me."

"Well they have stopped by, together and separate, and talked to Sam and Dean together and separate."

Gabriel stared at him. "That's it?"

"It did not appear to have the desired effect."

Gabriel snorted. "Yeah and I can see why! I could give them such better advice!"

"But will you?" Castiel asked, suddenly piercing eyes staring straight at him. "I know your attempt did not work either but you did not have very long to try before Sam and Dean managed to trap you. It was certainly more unique than what has been happening."

"I think I'm out of the 'actually trying to speed up the apocalypse' business."

Castiel tilted his head. "Why?"

"It was one thing if I just got the yes and sent them on their way but now that Michael and Lucifer know about me they'd know I was involved and then I'd have to listen to a whole lecture about how see, I can't actually stay out of it. And then the demands to pick a side now that I've given up the pretense would start and, well, I'm not here for any of that," Gabriel explained. "Besides, it's not like they even asked me and maybe I just don't feel like giving up the information."

"Why are you asking me about this?" Castiel wondered. "You said that Michael and Lucifer were not very clear but you could have gone to them for clarification. Or, now that you are no longer hiding, you could have asked any number of people their perspective."

"I have, believe me," Gabriel said, groaning. "It's just that nobody seems to actually be able to explain this to me in a way that makes sense. I'm pretty sure Lucifer's just going along with Michael because he's Lucifer and has no problem going against convention and reason but I'm still not sure where Michael's head is at. I know he misses Lucifer but this is just going to make their fight worse and surely that can't be worth it for a few…however long the Winchesters can hang out of time spent trying to be professional and just working with the guy. And all the people who have questioned his plan, including me, he _has _to see how weird it is. Or at least that we all think it's weird even if he's all robotic logic and 'we have a shared goal so we will work together to complete the goal and everything else is secondary.' I mean, I'm starting to actually get worried."

"Forgive me if I don't spare any sympathy for the people who are out to kill me and have cut me off from the heavenly host," Castiel said stiffly. "And who are attempting to destroy this world before it's time and break the two best humans that I know in order to do it."

Gabriel shrugged. "Eh, that's fair. You understand what's what, even if you never knew Michael and Lucifer all that well."

"Lucifer called me a peculiar creature," Castiel informed him.

Gabriel eyed him critically. "Well, you have me there. You _are _a peculiar creature."

Castiel frowned at him.

"Not that I'm one to talk but I've had a little longer to turn out like this. You met Dean Winchester, what, five minutes ago? He is a _terrible _influence on you."

"I happen to disagree," Castiel said, quiet but firm.

"At least you understand. I'm afraid Sam and Dean are getting quite the negative perception of us."

"Not _us_," Castiel said pointedly. "And angels have little to do with what they think of you."

"Technically, I wouldn't have been more than a trickster they killed if they hadn't been the vessels," Gabriel said. "Hell, if they hadn't been the vessels I might not have even stayed long enough for them to work it out."

"There is enough that we can lay at the feet of our brothers," Castiel said. "This was your choice."

Gabriel just sighed and rolled his eyes. "You know what I'm talking about. We're more than just this apocalypse, more than following orders until it tears worlds apart. I don't think they're ever going to be able to see that."

"I do not believe it would matter to our brothers," Castiel said. "And maybe if humans are to be able to see good in us, we shouldn't keep trying to destroy them for the sake of settling old angelic conflicts that actually have little to do with them despite the pretense."

Gabriel shook his head. "You can't live as long as we have without pretense, Castiel. Unlike most races, there will never be any more of us, only less. We are all that there is, all that there ever will be. And now we want to kill each other and why nobody sees the sheer horror of that I will never understand but we just never get a break. All that time I was gone and I come back and nothing's really changed. I can't even tell if I have or if that's all pretense, too. Is it really that much of a surprise that it's come to this?"

"I see the horror of it," Castiel admitted. "But what can I do? They are hunting me. They are trying to destroy this world. And maybe they and even you do not believe this world is worth preserving, at least at the cost of angelic lives, but I've made my choice. These people do not deserve the fate heaven or hell has in store for them and the cost of protecting them is not their problem. I try to keep the casualties to a minimum even if they accord me no similar courtesy. If you have another way, a way that doesn't end with humanity's loss, then I would gladly welcome it. But as long as Michael and Lucifer insist that this has to happen then it has to happen. They can pretend to powerlessness all they want but, for all our efforts, it really does come down to them in the end."

"And yet you continue to try and fight them?"

"I could perhaps find Father," Castiel said. "And even if I don't, even if I lose and watch the world burn and one day burn myself, there is no other choice to make. 'Damn the consequences', as Dean says, and die knowing you are doing what is right."

Gabriel just shook his head. "It's times like these I'm glad I was blessed without a conscience."

Castiel gave him a knowing look.

* * *

"Would you find it terribly strange if I said that I believe one of my demons is plotting against me?" Lucifer asked idly.

"They're _demons_," Michael pointed out. "Treachery is their nature."

"Oh, treachery against each other or against humans, sure," Lucifer said impatiently. "But against me? I've never been in this position before."

"Well you have been locked away for thousands of years and most demons weren't around before then," Michael pointed out. "And, demons being demons, it's more surprising you think it's only one of them betraying you."

"That's other people, though," Lucifer said dismissively. "I am their God!"

Michael closed his eyes, willing himself to ignore the almost taunting blasphemy. Lucifer was doing it on purpose. He would not give him that satisfaction. "Your creations, with everything good in them burned away, and you set quite the rebellious example."

Lucifer's lips quirked up. "It is hypocritical for me to have done what I did and still have a problem with this potential treachery? Perhaps. You certainly seem to think so. But I find both of my positions, rebelling and resenting being rebelled against, perfectly reasonable. And I am not a human to be frightened off by accusations."

No, nothing would ever frighten Lucifer off. Some days, Michael thought Lucifer had more certainty than him, more certainty than anyone, and his only guide was his own judgment. It was almost admirable and wasn't that terrifying?

"Why do you suspect a single demon to be plotting against you then?"

"The Winchesters tried to kill me with the Colt and Crowley has gone into hiding."

"Are you sure he wasn't just killed?" Michael asked.

Lucifer shrugged. "He might have been except that no one seems to have heard anything and killing the king of the crossroads is something to brag about. No one has claimed his position, either."

"I thought the Winchesters already possessed the Colt," Michael said. He had not paid them much attention in the past and really wouldn't know one way or another.

"They did," Lucifer confirmed. "But some stupid little girl who sold her soul as a child and was trying to weasel her way out of it had handed the Colt over to Crowley. He had promised to release her but, being a demon, then demanded the Winchesters' deaths as well. Though I doubt even that would have saved her. Crowley's reputation for strict adherence to deals is not always supported by what he does."

Michael spared a moment to regret all the human souls he had been tasked to protect who had fallen under Lucifer's sway. "That does seem pretty clear-cut then. Unless he was robbed and fears being killed for incompetence." That sounded like something demons would do, right? He was hardly an expert on hell. After his lengthy imprisonment, he wondered if Lucifer still was.

"I did consider that but he's very careful," Lucifer said. "And it seems unlike our dear vessels to suffer a demon to live, especially after Ruby's deception."

"Why would a demon turn against you?" Michael asked.

"I don't know. There's being power hungry but I Have a hard time believing he would actually try to kill me and usurp my spot."

"Maybe it's occurred to him that you intend to one day destroy him and his ilk," Michael suggested.

Lucifer blinked at him. "I didn't tell you I was going to do that."

"No but I know you and it seems rather obvious given your hatred for humans and demons being humans without any of the good points."

"Good points," Lucifer repeated, scoffing. "But yes, I fully intend to do away with them. Not that I find it very likely that one and only one demon would work that out."

"As someone who may want your crown, he's likely less enamored of you than the rest," Michael said.

"The thought that they could seek to kill their God!" Lucifer burst out. "And for what? I rebelled for nothing but the purest of philosophical reasons. Crowley just wants power."

Privately, Michael would be less disapproving of Crowley than of Lucifer. Lucifer was not actually a god, regardless of his delusions to the contrary, and Crowley at least wanted power. Lucifer wanted to destroy an inconsequential species that he feared – they all feared – their father loved more. But nothing good would come from pointing this out to him. Nothing ever had.

"Even _I _never sought to kill God!"

"You knew that you couldn't kill him. The Colt cannot kill us but, to my knowledge, it had never been attempted so it was a reasonable mistake to make."

"I confiscated their little toy once they dropped it," Lucifer said. "We don't need to throw that into the mix."

"And Crowley? You clearly haven't killed him yet or you wouldn't be worrying about this."

"He's in hiding," Lucifer said. "I'm sure I could find him' I found Gabriel and he doesn't have the same resources. But let him hide. Let him plot. He can't kill me and I do not have the time to chase him. If I see him, I will kill him."

"You are hard to kill but it can be done," Michael said, "though perhaps not by mere demons. Father cannot be killed."

"That's not what Raphael thinks."

"Raphael is a good and loyal angel," Michael said evenly, "but he, too, has his flaws. His lack of faith is troubling but when compared to the likes of you and Gabriel…"

"Speaking of Raphael," Lucifer said, sounding far too casual to be genuine. "I haven't seen him in literally thousands of years now."

"You haven't seen _anyone _in thousands of years," Michael pointed out.

"But I've been out for _months _now," Lucifer countered. "And while that may not be a very long time, it is plenty of time to see him. I've seen plenty of people. We even tracked down Gabriel! And somehow I haven't seen our other brother."

"He refused to see Gabriel for the longest time, too, if that makes you feel any better," Michael offered. He decided against explaining that they only did reunite once Gabriel forced the situation. The last thing Lucifer needed was to have incentive to return to heaven.

"Why would that make me feel any better?"

"He also very rarely leaves heaven."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "He left long enough for Castiel and Dean Winchester to trap him in holy fire."

"An experience which has not endeared this place to him."

"I want to see him," Lucifer said seriously.

"You're fighting a war against him."

Another eye roll. "Michael, I'm also fighting a war against you and I see you all the time. Gabriel is sticking his head in the sand and futilely trying to stay out of it and we've seen him on multiple occasions. I followed Castiel around for a few hours last week trying to figure out what he was up to. Little things like irreconcilable philosophical differences really have nothing to do with it. Raphael is family."

"That's…not how he sees it."

"What?" Lucifer asked, offended. "Just because I rebelled against heaven and am going to kill you and created demons to lead against the armies of heaven that means I'm suddenly not family anymore?"

"It's not that," Michael explained, shaking his head. "He just doesn't want to see you."

"Why not?"

"He kept talking about those irreconcilable philosophical differences," Michael said. "We are working together on a common goal so this cease-fire makes perfect sense. Raphael knows you will either kill me, in which case he wants nothing to do with you, or be killed by me in which case he would rather not risk getting attached to you again."

"I suppose I should be flattered that he thinks if we spent time together he would have to admit to loving me," Lucifer said dryly. "Couldn't you talk to him about it?"

"To what end?" Michael asked. "He's not wrong, Lucifer, and he doesn't want to."

"It's just terribly unfair that he's using my probable death – let's not pretend he actually thinks you're going to die – as an excuse not to see me. He thinks I'm going to _die _and he can't even spare five minutes," Lucifer complained.

Michael nodded slowly. "Almost as unfair as you trying to force our brother to see you because you're putting your desire to see him above his well-being."

"I'm the one who might be running out of time!"

"And that isn't his fault," Michael said firmly. "You know how he gets. Or if you don't then you should. Everyone left, Lucifer. And you did one worse. You betrayed us before you went."

Lucifer's eyes grew cold. "_I _betrayed you?"

"Yes, you did," Michael said. He held up a hand. "And I know you will say that we betrayed you, too, and maybe betrayed you first and you know I will not agree but it honestly doesn't matter. That's not how he sees it and if he doesn't want to meet with you forcing the matter will just lead to a fight."

"Better a fight than radio silence," Lucifer insisted.

"Why are you so insistent on seeing him, anyway?" Michael asked. "And don't tell me that it's because he's our brother. You talk a lot about familial affection and reunions given that your actions have led to the deaths of many angels."

"Not just _my _actions," Lucifer corrected him. "And from what I can understand, at least one angel who completely misunderstood me killed angels for not supporting me. Angel death is one of the last things I want. If it must happen, it must happen but not before then."

"Why?" Michael asked again.

Lucifer sighed and looked away. "What am I supposed to do? Exist entirely by myself? Why do you think I'm agreeing to help you with this?"

Michael drew back, surprised. "I had thought it was because you wish to hasten the consent of our vessels."

"It would be a nice perk," Lucifer agreed. "But do you have any idea what it's like to be surrounded by nothing but demons all day?"

"No," Michael said, "because I take care not to have that be my life. You are the one who chooses to surround yourself with them and you are the one who created them."

"One demon," Lucifer corrected. "I created one demon. And, well, there were the knights of course but that's different. And Lilith had such potential! But she's dead now, sacrificed to bring me back. I almost didn't hate her. I'm not sentimental but remembering everything she was and looking at the worthless creatures I am surrounded with today…"

"You should have known when you chose altered humans as your followers that you would hate it," Michael said unsympathetically.

"I didn't _choose _them, exactly," Lucifer defended himself. "When I first transformed Lilith I had no idea what I was doing or what that would lead to. And their population grew far beyond my expectations while I was trapped. And when I came back and they all worshipped me and wanted to fight with me…I may be able to kill virtually any angel I come up against but, aside from my disinclination to do that, I can't very well stand against the full might of heaven alone. If nothing else, it looks a little sad."

"It would look rather pathetic," Michael conceded.

"But they're so cloying! It's always 'Master, look at all the violence I did today!' or 'Master, did you see this human soul I bought.' And I just don't care. But if I don't at least pretend to be interested and not hate them desperately they might realize the truth and, for now at least, I'd rather have them with me than stand alone."

Michael sighed. "Even though this situation is entirely of your own making, I understand where you're coming from."

Lucifer raised an eyebrow. "Really? Trouble in literal paradise?"

"It's not any huge issue," Michael qualified. "It's just that I'm starting to wonder whether our brothers want this apocalypse for the right reason."

Lucifer stared at him. "What?"

"I know it doesn't seem important," Michael said again. "But lately I've really had to wonder. We all want the apocalypse and to have paradise on Earth but while I wish to do it because it is what Father wanted and I hope that in finally resolving this conflict with you He will come back, their reasons are somewhat…lesser, I think. Raphael constantly speaks of how tired he is of having to manage Earth. As if we really interfered in the last several thousand years. I know other angels agree with him. Many hate humanity or wish to just win."

"That does sound about right," Lucifer said nodding. "What's the problem?"

"The problem is that this isn't about winning and this isn't about wanting paradise. Paradise would be an appreciated reward, yes, though not as appreciated as Father returning but we have no guarantee that he even will."

"What does it matter why they want it when they're all falling in line behind you and want what you want?" Lucifer asked. "For my part, I don't care if demons want the apocalypse or not. Most do, I think, but some of the crossroad demons enjoy their job and know that they won't get to continue it if I kill all humans. Or if I kill all of them but, again, that's hardly public knowledge."

"I just worry," Michael said. "You know the part our brothers played in releasing you. That actually was not my idea but one that was brought to me. It made sense, of course. The vessels were here and your demons were moving towards freeing you and so the timing seemed right to just sort of let them have their way so we could have the apocalypse."

"Don't tell me you're having second thoughts _now_!" Lucifer exclaimed. "Because it really is a little late to put me back in the box."

"I'm just wondering if what they told me was really what was guiding them or if they were trying to convince me to let this happen now and not whenever in the future proper vessels would come along again and we could not stop you from being freed. If they weren't just trying to hasten this world's destruction in order to have their paradise sooner. I can sympathize with them wanting peace but I cannot allow that sort of departure from duty. This was always going to happen but it needs to happen because it is right and not because we don't want to wait any longer for destiny."

"Seeing as how I see so few angels these days I really can't swear to one thing or the other but I do know that nobody is as devoted to duty as you," Lucifer said. "Still, I don't believe any of them would knowingly act against Father's plan, at least not without being double agents like Uriel. Whether they believe that he even left instructions might be another matter but I really don't see what you want to do about their motivation. If they are on your side that should be enough."

Michael sighed. "It's not, though. And I know that I can't know for sure what motivates our brothers and I couldn't change if it I did – well, not through any reasonable means – but I'm starting to get very uncomfortable with this. Why wouldn't it be enough for them that we carry through with our preordained battle? Why does selfishness and a desire to abandon responsibility play a part in it?"

Lucifer was quiet for a moment. "It has been a very long time since all of this started. Will you seriously say that you are not tired as well?"

Michael shook his head and closed his eyes. "It has been very difficult. I wasn't expecting to have to fill His shoes. I don't know how I ever could have prepared."

"Well," Lucifer said slowly, after a bit of an awkward silence. "You haven't yet created any creature that would make me want to declare war on you so you have my approval."

Michael laughed despite himself. "I'm pretty sure that's actually a terrible sign for how I'm doing."

"You should learn to take a compliment," Lucifer advised.

"I know that there's nothing to do, really, and on a practical level it doesn't matter but I just wish things were different, is all," Michael admitted.

"I think we all wish that," Lucifer said. "But we can only work with what we have."

"Who ever would have thought that freeing you was the easy part?" Michael asked suddenly.

"Easy?" Lucifer repeated. "Well, I suppose it was for me. I just had to sit around and wait to be set free. But it took thousands of years and even after one of my most faithful servants managed to communicate with me to the extent I could explain about Lilith and a special child it took decades."

"Most of our effort was not stopping the demons and making it look like we were trying to stop the demons while not really doing much to do that and simultaneously not costing lives," Michael said. "But still, in order to free you the idea vessels had to be created and we eventually figured out we needed to combine two bloodlines. The cupids apparently had a great deal of trouble with the parents then Sam and Dean had to be revived whenever they died prematurely. Dean had to make a deal and get sent to hell, Sam had to fall under a demon's sway so he would drink the blood and kill Lilith, Dean had to trust us enough to pledge his services…it was all going so well. And then they vanished from that church and things haven't been going right since."

"You know that was probably His interference, right?" Lucifer asked rhetorically.

"It disrupted our plans but I will never resent proof that Father is still out there," Michael said. "Besides, Dean being there when you returned would not have gone very well and perhaps we are meant to have to work for our consent and not just have it handed to us. Sam would have been in no state to refuse you had Father not removed him from the situation."

"It could mean he disapproves of this whole thing."

"If he did, why wouldn't he make that a little clearer and not leave oblique hints?" Michael challenged.

"Would you really say trying to get consent has been harder than all of that?" Lucifer asked. "Maybe harder for us personally as we both delegated but it hasn't been very long and we haven't tried all that hard to get the yes because we're both so convinced it's inevitable."

"Freeing you took a lot of time and effort but it was pretty straightforward. The most complicated part was getting Sam in a position where he would imbibe the blood and go after Lilith at the appointed time. Persuading two people who genuinely do not want us to do battle to facilitate our fight, on the other hand? We will find a way eventually, of that I am certain, but it is nowhere near as simple as merely freeing you was."

Lucifer scowled. "Leave it to humans to make things difficult."

"Given that we intend to wipe out at least a good chunk of the human race and you really can't blame them for being…resistant."

"I think I can, actually," Lucifer disagreed. "Michael, do you really think God is coming back?"

"Yes, of course," Michael said immediately. "Maybe not when you are killed, He never promised that, but He has to come back. He isn't dead and we have all of eternity for Him to return. Obviously I would prefer sooner to later but I can wait if I must. I have become very good at waiting."

"You are so certain that He will praise you for killing me. Have you ever thought that maybe that's not the outcome He wanted?"

Many times. If only he knew how many times Michael had gazed into the void and asked himself if he was interpreting Father's orders correctly. All he wanted was to be the good son and to do what he was expected of him but it was difficult to figure out what that was since he hadn't always been left with the clearest of instructions. And even when he had, that was long ago and much had changed since then. "Do you really think that?"

"I really think that there must have been a reason He told you to seal me away and not kill me."

"Maybe he did want to give you a second chance," Michael conceded. "You have done nothing with it."

"After being locked in a box alone for so long, it would be optimistic to the point of foolishness to expect me to have come around on anything," Lucifer told him. "Surely Father would have known that. It's really not that complicated."

"I don't know for sure why he left," Michael said. "I believe it was because of what you did and so it makes sense that once you are gone, and once, perhaps, he mourns for you, he will return. But perhaps I am wrong. Perhaps he left so that he could see how we would fare in his absence. I hope I am not disappointing him."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "As though you could ever be that."

Michael hid a smile. It was such a Lucifer thing to do, hide a compliment behind exasperation. "He will return, one day. I may not know any of the particulars or what will happen when He does but He will."

"How can you be so sure?" Lucifer demanded. "Did he say anything to you before he left? Give any indication he was going to go or that he'd be back?"

Michael shook his head. It was hard to think back to that time. "Not so much. I had no idea. I never even thought…but I did know that your rebellion was hard on Him. Watching Him as time went on and you still refused to see reason…not to mention the fact that in some ways I know He blamed Himself."

Lucifer stilled. "Because He was the one to create the humans and then demand that we bow down to them in the first place?"

It felt almost wrong to say, that Father blamed Himself. Michael didn't even know it for a fact but, looking back, what other conclusion could he have drawn? But He wouldn't have blamed himself for Lucifer's unreasonableness concerning the humans.

"You know what for."

Lucifer glared at him. "How many times do I have to tell you that what happened had nothing to do with that?"

"It only happened after you had it," Michael reminded him.

"And what does that mean?" Lucifer asked. "Gabriel only came back after Raphael had been trapped by a human. Do those two events have to be connected, too, or is it just the constraints of linear time?"

"That's hardly the same thing," Michael said.

"Maybe not but I think I would know if I were being forced to feel the way that I do."

"Maybe not forced," Michael said. "But Lucifer, we really don't know much about the Mark and what it can do. There are literally only two people that it ever affected and before that it was a darkness threatening to engulf all of reality. It makes sense that it would have influenced you."

"I know myself," Lucifer said harshly. "I do not underestimate it's power and I can feel, even now, that darkness but it is not controlling me. It is not me. I didn't change. If the humans had arrived before Father asked me to take that mark then nothing would be different except I wouldn't have people doubting whether I really feel that way or whether I'm some sort of victim."

"You wouldn't know if you were."

"_You _wouldn't know the first thing about it," Lucifer countered. "Everyone was content to ignore it and move on, taking the victory, until I began to have some ideas of my own."

"Maybe we were wrong to do that," Michael said. "Maybe that's what's led us here."

"I've given up a lot to fight for what I believe in," Lucifer said. And what was that, anyway? Death to humans? What a sad little cause. "Don't do me the disservice of claiming that, on top of everything else I've lost, I've been denied my own agency."

"I don't know if that's true or not," Michael said. "I don't know if I want it to be true."

Lucifer peered curiously at him. "Why would you want that to be true? Why would you want to think that all of this has happened, to all of us but especially to me, and it wasn't even my choice?"

When he put it that way, it sounded horrible. "I don't. But I never liked thinking you wanted this, either."

"Well, maybe not _exactly _this," Lucifer allowed. "You said we have two samples. There's me, of course, and then there's Cain."

"Cain killed millions. He was such a good man before," Michael said immediately.

"People change and it's been a very long time. Besides, he had promises to keep. But now he keeps bees. Now he hasn't killed anyone in a century and a half. Do you really think that I'm compelled to do this and he's not?"

"Maybe Colette meant more to him than any of us meant to you," Michael said stiffly.

Lucifer glared at him. "You know that's not true. But his mission was what? Killing people? He agreed to stop doing that, to let one demon live. What I need to do is far greater than that. But by all means, let's go test your hypothesis. Let's go see Cain and see how people can secretly be under the Mark's influence and they have no idea."


	7. Chapter 7

Lucifer landed less than a second after Michael did. It didn't matter, truly, and most beings wouldn't have been able to tell but it annoyed him just the same.

The bees swarmed curiously around them but they ignored them. They had nothing to fear from such small creatures.

Cain appeared in front of them then, covered in beekeeper's garb. Did he just want to dress the part or were bees something that could truly pain such a powerful demon?

"Lucifer," he said, not sounding at all surprised. His eyes flickered to Michael. "And…Michael. I see you've come to visit."

They followed him into his house and he set out tea.

Lucifer took a cup and sipped at it while Michael just peered suspiciously at him, although what that said was about Lucifer could not say.

"I had heard the apocalypse was about due," Cain said. "Though it seems to be slow going. And now you have time to visit me? Far be it for me to advocate the end of all things but you two seem to be taking your time."

"The vessels don't want to consent," Michael explained.

Cain's eyebrows rose. "And you're not able to persuade two humans?"

"We are working on it," Michael said, a bit touchily.

"I'm just saying, your entire apocalypse is on hold because two humans will not agree to it," Cain said, shaking his head. "I mean, I can understand them not wanting to get possessed and help destroy the world but at the same time this was an obvious limitation I would have expected you to have found a way to work around by now."

"I have a way," Lucifer said easily.

"And yet you are still here," Cain noted.

Lucifer shook his head. "That's a different matter. Michael is somehow failing to get his vessel to agree to try and preserve some small part of humanity. I just need to keep doing what I'm doing and wait for Sam Winchester to psychologically break. I'm in no rush."

Cain looked amused now and turned back to Michael. "Well?"

"I do not need to justify myself to you."

"That's true," Cain agreed. "But are you really going to let Lucifer's version of events rule the day?"

Michael frowned. No, of course he wouldn't. That was a good card to play. "Dean Winchester is very stubborn. He seeks to avert the whole apocalypse and thinks that by saying no and denying me the ability to try and stop my brother he will somehow save his people. He is absolutely refusing to face the fact that Lucifer will not stand down no matter who either of us is wearing."

"By that logic, you could always find someone else," Cain suggested. "You are, in fact, possessing someone else."

"I don't think it's come to that just yet," Michael said.

That was a surprise, the fact that Michael was implying that if this went on for too long he would just give in and go as John Winchester or someone else. But maybe that was surprising. What if Dean literally never did say yes? It was unlikely but consent could take longer than Michael was willing to wait.

"So what brings you to visit me?" Cain asked. "And if this has anything to do with my retirement, I did put in my two weeks."

Personally Lucifer rather doubted that. By all accounts, he hadn't been speaking of never killing again – even if he was on a break living with that human wife of his – until his wife died and he had stopped cold. And all of this was back in 1863, long before the concept of informing your employer you were leaving two weeks before doing so. But he supposed that technically he didn't _know_.

"I wasn't able to receive the news, being trapped in the darkest depths of hell."

"That really isn't _my _fault, though," Cain pointed out.

Well, no. That honor belonged to Michael and Michael alone. Their father may have ordered it, perhaps, Lucifer still wasn't sure of what exactly He had said and what Michael had just inferred and he had no intention of asking. The other angels had all tacitly approved by continuing to follow Michael, even the ones that had eventually come to their senses and supported him. He understood them.

Cain, the other demons, the humans…none of it had anything to do with them. What had they done, save exist? Exist and drive him to do what he did, far more than any insidious influence exerted by the Mark carved into his very being. It was enough.

"You can't very well retire from being what you are," Michael said. "You are still a demon and you still bear the Mark."

"I didn't retire from that so much," Cain conceded. "But I have stopped killing people and I no longer consider myself a knight of hell, insomuch as being a knight involves doing things and not just existing, so I have effectively retired and might as well just be an immortal human for all the difference it makes."

"Demons are really just immortal humans," Michael said. "Well, barring accidents, of course. And you weren't even tortured."

Cain waved a hand. "Well there you have it. No problems here."

"It's not reasonable for you to have given up dealing out death for good," Lucifer said. "You've _strayed_, Cain."

"I've put that life behind me," Cain said, clenching his jaw.

"We'll see."

"What do you think is going to happen?" Cain demanded. "That I've lived this long with the Mark without killing anyone and you come back and don't like it so that's going to change?"

"How did you even manage it?" Michael asked. "I have no firsthand knowledge but I believe that the Mark has a certain influence that compels you to kill."

"It was hard at first," Cain admitted. "Harder and harder as the weeks went by until I almost couldn't stand it. But I kept thinking of Colette, who loved me even knowing the truth and who died because of my sins. Colette who died knowing this and yet not hating me, only concerning herself with my soul. She used her last breath to beg me to stop. How could I pick up a blade again, even to kill the monster who murdered her, after that? I just kept thinking about that and eventually it got a little easier. I don't think I'll ever be cured of my little, uh, murder addiction but it's been a long time."

"You made a deal," Lucifer reminded him.

Cain's eyes flashed. "Yes and I kept it. Abel is safe in heaven and I gave myself to you. I have tortured and killed for you and done things that sometimes surprise even me to remember and I did it for thousands of years."

"But that wasn't the deal," Lucifer said. "It wasn't be mine until a pretty face came along and didn't like all the killing."

Cain didn't flinch. "Well what are you going to do about it? Kill me? I can't stop you. Take Abel back? Good luck assaulting heaven."

"We do not give away the souls we have been entrusted with," Michael said solemnly. "I will not allow Lucifer to harm your brother."

Cain nodded his thanks.

"You're a demon, Cain," Lucifer said. "Not the first, perhaps, but the best. The father of murder. How long did you know that woman? It couldn't have been more than a few years. Human lives are so very limited and I can't imagine that it would take long for your fellow knights to track you down. And you would change your entire existence for her, rob yourself of purpose, when even had she lived as long as a human could live she would be long dead by now?"

"It was just for her at first," Cain agreed. "But later I realized that I _liked _not killing people. I prefer myself like this. And I'm not going to define someone's importance in my life on how long they were there. I knew Abel a fraction of my lifespan and he will always be the person who defined me the most. I'm not you, Lucifer. I've been human and I don't carry your hatred for my species."

"All for a woman who would never have truly accepted you," Lucifer said, changing tracks effortlessly and shaking his head sadly.

Cain's arms made an aborted motion. "She knew and she accepted me. She even saw, that last night, and she still loved me and wanted to protect me."

"How much did she see?" Lucifer challenged. "Did she watch you kill all those knights? Even if she did, they were possessed by evil creatures and she didn't exactly have time to process it. She was probably hoping that you'd rescue her. But you failed."

"I didn't have a choice," Cain growled. "Abaddon murdered her while holding her hostage."

"I seem to recall that you stabbed her," Lucifer said thoughtfully.

"Abaddon was breaking her neck."

"Yes but once Abaddon fled she still had time to beg you to stop killing, yes?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "Her neck couldn't have been what killed her then."

Cain said nothing.

"You said that she knew what you were and loved you anyway. What does that mean?" Lucifer had always been curious how they had even met and the woman learned who he was but he wasn't exactly looking to hear Cain's little love story. "She may have seen you kill possessed men. She may have known what you did to your brother and why. She may have known, intellectually, that you had committed countless atrocities over the years. But did she know that you've ripped the still-beating heart from the chest of infants? That you've cut people in half for being in the way? That you taught the other knights everything they knew about depravity? That you enjoyed the good work that you did? Did she ever see any of it for herself and have to reconcile the monster with the good man she was oh so sure was hiding somewhere deep inside of you?"

Cain breathed slowly. "What did you come here for? You will not tarnish my memories of my dead wife and I refuse to believe that Michael would be here if the point was to get me to participate in your little apocalypse. You don't need me anyway."

"More neutrality," Lucifer said contemptuously. "As if Gabriel wasn't enough."

"I never expected him to be on my side," Michael said, unperturbed. "And he's not an angel so I'm sure it matters less."

"Gabriel was assumed to be on your side, as were all other angels," Lucifer said. "Regardless of the fact that some have sympathy for me that embarrasses you. Demons are _mine_."

"Why are you here?" Cain asked again.

"We have questions about the Mark."

Cain looked pointedly at Lucifer. "Do you now?"

Lucifer scowled. "Michael does, at any rate. He has the most ridiculous ideas about it."

"You're being influenced by it all the time," Michael said earnestly. "And I know that sometimes it is obvious when it's influencing you, it must be, when you're being tempted to kill. But you were a very different person once and might have been willing to kill your own brother out of love but you never would have imagined how far you'd fall. How much do you think the Mark really changes a person? Do you really think you're aware of all the changes?"

"That's…hard to say," Cain said slowly. "It has been quite a long time and you can't really ask someone if they are fully aware of something because they won't know what they don't know. Did the Mark change me or was all the murders that I have committed, largely because of the Mark, do that? But why does it matter to you? Why are you taking time out of your apocalypse to come ask me about my personal experiences here? Michael, it has been thousands of years since I've seen you."

Michael bowed his head. "I was horrified when I learned what had happened to you and why. You're just doing so well these days but you still have the Mark and you're never going to be free of it, or at least probably not. And even if it were to be removed – and we all know why it can't be cured – you can't have something like that sitting on your soul for so long and expect it to go back to what it once was once the taint is gone."

"The Mark of Cain," Cain mused. "That's what they call it. Lucifer's Mark is what I called it. Is that why you're here?"

It was annoying to have him realize that but perhaps not surprising. Michael was not being subtle and his motivations for being here and asking all of these questions didn't make sense unless it involved Lucifer.

"I am not a human," Lucifer bit out. "I have never lost control of myself nor have I ever done anything that was against my previous inclination. And you can't say otherwise because humans were only created afterwards, Michael."

"Perhaps the different species are affected differently-"

"In which case being here is a complete waste of time," Lucifer interrupted.

"If I am understanding this correctly, Lucifer bears the same mark I do and resents the idea that it is the reason he fell," Cain said. "While Michael probably wants to blame an external force for what happened. Although if it really is not his fault and the result of the Mark, won't that make your plan to kill him worse since he would just be a victim?"

"I'm not victim," Lucifer spat. "Do you view yourself as one?"

"No," Cain said. "But that seems to be what Michael's looking for."

"I just find it a giant coincidence that the only angel who fell, something that shocked all of us, just happened to be the one who also had darkness incarnate fused into his very being," Michael said. "He was the best of us!"

"I'm certainly the only one who had the courage to say what we were all thinking and to stand up against the false supremacy of the humans," Lucifer said. "Is it really my fault if everyone completely overreacted to it?"

"It's kind of genocide," Cain pointed out.

"It was against Father's will!" Michael burst out.

"And also that, I guess," Cain said. "Look, you'll never be able to prove it one way or another and right now it doesn't even matter. Lucifer will always have it and you're only trying to kill him because you believe it is God's will and there's no other effective method for stopping him, right? So while it might be more comforting to blame the Mark for what happened, it is just as unsettling to realize that you have to kill him when maybe he doesn't deserve it. Why does it even matter?"

"It matters," Lucifer said testily, "because I am not so weak as he seems to think and I do not want him to think that the very clear-headed choices and sacrifices I have made are the result of anything but careful consideration."

"I just don't see how something so monumental as Lucifer making these decisions all on his own or his being controlled by the Mark are something I can just brush off and not care about," Michael said. "I know that ultimately the ending may be the same but it _matters _how we got there."

"I'm afraid I cannot help you figure out how that is and you know Lucifer's take on the matter," Cain said.

Michael sighed and looked meaningfully at him. "Yes, yes I do."

* * *

Sam didn't like to be apart from Dean for too long and definitely not when it wasn't his choice. Sometimes he thought about just what that said about him and Dean and the various ways that people had gently reminded him over the years that that probably wasn't healthy and might end up destroying the world someday. Someday soon, even, with this whole apocalypse happening.

But he tried not to ruminate on it for too long. Life was short and the world could end literally any day now. Why make himself miserable if the chances were good he didn't even have the time to try and sort that whole mess out?

Sam had been without Dean for four years and it was a million times easier than those four months when Dean had been in hell and now the four days it had taken for him to pull up next to the Impala.

"Finally, you're here!" Dean said, leaning against the front of the car and opening a beer.

"Dean, you probably haven't even been here for five minutes," Sam pointed out.

Dean just grinned and wiggled his eyebrows at him. "You'll never know. As the person who arrived first, I reserve the right to mock you for your lateness from now until eternity."

"I'm glad you're admitting you're not going to have anything better to mock me about so you'll have to resort to that," Sam said.

"Oh, I've got way better material," Dean said. "But it never hurts to stock up on new stuff."

"Oh really."

"Ruby. The apocalypse. Any of that ringing a bell?"

"I thought we were done with all of that," Sam said. "You gave me the knife back and welcome me back aboard."

"Yeah, no. That was me being – mostly – done blaming you for that and done treating you like a fuck-up," Dean said. "But you did kind of start the apocalypse, Sammy. That's the kind of thing that isn't forgotten so easily."

Sam rolled his eyes. Part of him was already sick of everyone reminding him of that and the guilt might never go away completely but, though he'd never tell Dean, he did sort of appreciate the fact he'd been given so much grief for it that he could now face the subject with a simple eye roll. "It was an accident."

"It was also an accident that time I ran into that cop car but that didn't stop me from getting arrested," Dean pointed out.

"Oh, come on, that's not the same thing."

Dean nodded. "You're right. One of us had to pay quite a bit of money and the other of us started the apocalypse."

"It's not like I knew what I was doing," Sam said.

"Because every idiot who sells their soul knows exactly what they're going in for," Dean said. "Judging by when she died, Bela would have been like fourteen when she sold hers. And while literally getting your parents killed makes you kind of the worst child ever, they're not rotting in hell like she is and I guess 'I hate you! I wish you were dead!' isn't too out there for a teenager. Her bad luck she said it to a demon."

"We weren't like that," Sam said. "You especially weren't."

Dean shrugged. "Yeah, well, maybe trying to use us to gauge normal behavior isn't the best idea you've ever had."

"I do have to wonder about that," Sam said. "I don't think we'll ever know but…she agreed to sell her soul to have her parents killed. And sure, I'm willing to bet they didn't tell her the whole story but all those other people we met seemed to know it was ten years and they were done so they had to tell her _something_. I find it kind of hard to believe that she just, you know, didn't like her parents."

"So, what?" Dean asked skeptically. "You think they were abusing her or something?"

"You said that when you asked she said you wouldn't understand, that no one had," Sam reminded him.

Dean shrugged again. "Yeah, well, I figured that she meant that nobody would understand she accidentally got her parents killed. I mean, total accident maybe, nobody really means that stuff. But it doesn't make you any less hell's bitch."

"You, on the other hand, knew exactly what you were doing," Sam said. "Except maybe the details of just how bad it would get. But that's the kind of thing you really have to go through to get, I think."

Dean shuddered. "Uh, yeah. But obviously I'm the idiot who knew what he was getting into and did it anyway. You're welcome."

"I'm just saying, the angels probably would have brought me back eventually to go be Lucifer's puppet," Sam said.

Dean raised his eyes to the sky in a 'look what I have to put up with' gesture. "But then they'd have you and just how long do you think they could work on you with no interruptions before you said yes? I mean, not knocking you or anything but they'd have _forever_."

"So maybe it could have been worse," Sam said. "Though they gave you back pretty quickly."

"Pretty quickly's relative," Dean said. "And they would have gotten me there anyway. At least this way it was by being pretty much the most amazing brother ever."

"Hey, I tried," Sam said. "I tried to trade you for me."

"And by undoing all of my good work, you were trying to be the worst brother ever," Dean said. "Very ungrateful."

Sam just shook his head. "I thought I was saving the world."

"Isn't that what Gordon thought he was doing coming after you?" Dean asked innocently.

"…You know, I feel like if it weren't for the angels bringing me back eventually that would have actually worked."

"Freaking angels," Dean said, more because of his general opinion on non-Castiel angels than because he objected to the idea of Sam being brought back to life. "And that's what Anna was up to, too."

"It's a bit alarming just how many people try to kill me in the name of saving the world," Sam said. "Like, seriously, pretty much all the people we know who have tried to do something evil to save the day have tried to kill me."

"People don't try to kill me to save the world," Dean said.

"Well I guess not all of us can be lucky enough to be the slightly less dickish angel's meatsuit," Sam said.

"You're just jealous," Dean said.

"Uh-uh, that's it exactly. You know, every time you bring that up you're also bringing up the fact that you killed my girlfriend," Sam said. "I mean, Jess wasn't on you and I'm still eighty percent sure Madison had to die but the only other girlfriend I've had since then you actually killed."

"You literally held her in place for me!"

"Yeah but you're the one who stabbed her," Sam pointed out.

"She had just started the apocalypse!"

"And as you've just finished reminding me, so did I."

"She did it on purpose!" Dean exclaimed.

"And yet me doing it accidentally doesn't seem to matter so why should that?" Sam asked rhetorically.

"I can't even believe you're giving me shit about Ruby," Dean complained. "_I_ should be giving _you _shit about her."

"But you do, Dean. Oh, you do," Sam assured him.

"Remind me why I drove four days to meet up with you again?" Dean asked.

"Because I don't love you enough to drive eight days while you sat on your ass," Sam retorted.

"I still think we should've asked Cas," Dean said.

"And waste some of his remaining grace?" Sam asked.

"He's wasting it all over the place on his little God search."

"And I think you remember how much fun it was the last time we interrupted him in the middle of that," Sam said. Nobody did depression like a newly fallen angel who believed he had fallen for nothing because Sam and Dean had personally failed him and so now he was off looking everywhere for someone he had never met who could be anywhere and who clearly didn't want to be found.

Dean made a face. "Yeah. I do have to wonder what the point of separating us was. Unless it was just because they're dicks because that is _always _a possibility. A probability, even."

Sam blinked and suddenly he was in what his years of movie-watching experience taught him was a post-apocalyptic landscape. "Um…what?"

Dean looked around and curled his hands up into fists. "Fuck, not this again."

"Not what again?" Sam asked, mystified.

There was a sound.

"I'll explain later. Run."

* * *

Sam didn't know how long they'd been running or hiding but he turned a corner and ran straight into…himself.

"Sam Winchester," the other him said pleasantly. There was something wrong about his smile and the pristine white suit he was wearing amidst all the carnage. "And Dean! So lovely to see you again!"

"Dean?" Sam asked. The image before him didn't make sense. It just didn't. Not at all. And even when they had to stop and wait, Dean hadn't said a thing. He had kept saying that it wasn't the time and he would explain later and he had no idea why Dean would even know what was going on. And now this.

"Ignore him, Sam," Dean ordered.

"How am I supposed to do that when he's literally right in front of me?" Sam demanded. "Dean, what's going on?"

"You're in another universe," the other Sam said. "Maybe your future and maybe not. Close enough to your future, I'm sure, but the details may be different."

"The details are different," Dean growled. "The future is different!"

"Now, Dean," the other him said reprovingly. "You know that you can't know that."

"And you can't know it either! You've never even been to my world and you never will!"

"No but from the way you're looking at me I know that you haven't managed to stop what is coming," the other Sam said calmly. "Not that I really needed the confirmation. You can't stop it. You couldn't stop it here, your future self certainly couldn't stop it, and you won't be able to stop it there, either. You'll be lucky if you have it this good."

"This good?" Dean challenged, seeming to almost forget that Sam was even there. "I watched you step on my head. You broke my neck!"

The other him tilted his head, reminding Sam irresistibly of Castiel. "I do believe he was there to kill me. Self-defense, you know."

Dean snorted. "That is suck crap. You know he couldn't kill me. I shot Lucifer point-blank in the head and it did _nothing_."

"Now, I'm sure that's not true," the other him disagreed. "It probably hurt."

"So you feel justified killing me just because you didn't want to get a little injured?" Dean demanded.

"I feel justified killing you because you came to kill me. I feel justified killing you because you are my brother's vessel, occupied or not. I feel justified killing you because you're a human and, in case you missed the memo, that is _just _what I do."

"I don't understand," Sam said. He didn't.

The other him gave him an almost pitying look. "Ah, but you do. And, I'm sorry, but I did tell you. This was always your fate. The sooner you stop trying to resist the easier it will be."

"You call this easy?" Dean demanded angrily, waving his hand around.

"Sam didn't have to see any of this," the man said. "I'm not heartless."

"You son of a bitch."

Sam did know, was the worst part.

"Lucifer."

Lucifer smiled at him. "It's not so bad, really."

"We've been running from…from I don't even know what," Sam told him. "Those people…Croatoan. I've seen it before."

"You only getting to destroy humanity once," Lucifer explained. "Why rush it?"

"You killed Dean," Sam said. Of course he did. He wouldn't be here if he hadn't. It wasn't his Dean, probably wasn't even Dean at all by that point. But what Dean had said about the Colt…it didn't add up. "You won?"

"In a manner of speaking," Lucifer said. "This is certainly a victory for me but…Do you know why you're here?"

Sam shook his head.

"Your brother has been here before. Angels sent him to try and persuade him to say yes to Michael. I can only assume you've been added now because he still won't say yes. I know better than anyone that he will _never _say yes."

"If only the you that I know could be that certain," Dean grumbled.

"Why would you killing Dean convince him to say yes and allow the same thing to happen all over again?"

Lucifer smiled pleasantly. It was hard to look at him. "Because don't you get it? Michael ended up so fed up with Dean's defiance – he wouldn't even try to yes until weeks after you said yes – and he never _really _wanted to kill me no matter what _daddy _said. I think he was glad of the excuse, honestly, and it's not like he ever really wanted to protect your people. The angels really think there's any hope of changing Dean's mind but I think we all know better."

"You don't know me," Dean snapped.

Lucifer smiled beatifically at him. "They want Dean to say yes before Michael walks away from the whole thing."

"Why send me?" Sam asked.

"I can only speculate," Lucifer said. "Though I suppose I do know my brothers, even my brothers from a divergent universe, far better than you ever could. They want to remind Dean of why he should say yes and, though you wouldn't think seeing what I will do will persuade you, the fact remains that your Michael hasn't called it quits yet. If they truly believe that nothing short of your capitulation will persuade Dean then they can link the two. You help me end the pathetic human race, not that I was not fully prepared to do it without you if you took too because unlike Michael I have the conviction, and that leads to Dean running to Michael to help preserve at least something of it. Though I daresay that saving humanity is hardly Michael's priority. I always knew that because how could any angel _truly _care for humans? But this just proved it.

"Cas cares," Dean insisted. "And Anna. Even when she did her whole psycho murder thing, she was still trying to save humanity."

"I said an angel couldn't," Lucifer said mildly. "I do not know what sort of madness would drive them to humanity but, well, there you have it."

Dean just looked away.

Castiel? Human? It was impossible to imagine and, judging from the look on Dean's face, nothing good.

"It's irony of the most delicious kind but your best bet for stopping me is to actually give in to me. Not that should I be stopped it would be credited to you at all since it would be Michael's might and Dean's need to save you from your weakness."

"That's hardly your usual sale's pitch," Sam managed to say.

Lucifer just looked amused. "Yes, I suppose I may be a shade less persuasive than usual but, then, what's left to persuade? I already have you and it really doesn't matter whether another me does. Not that I have any interest in sabotaging him, of course, but me standing here is further proof of what I was saying all along. I don't have to have sweet words for you, dear Samuel, because you're always going to say yes to me. The circumstances don't have to be set. You could set some demands and make out quite well or you could turn to me when you literally cannot go on anymore but know you would be denied an escape in death. I did not say that the journey was inevitable, only its destination."

Dean clenched his fists. "This is bull and you know it!"

"All I know is that this conversation really doesn't involve you and loudly protesting that I'm lying isn't the same as pointing out where my reasoning falls short," Lucifer said. "All I know is that you don't seem to trust that Sam can deal with this on his own."

"Who should even have to deal with the devil on his own?" Dean demanded. "This isn't some secret test of character. You're the biggest monster that's ever existed and you're targeting my little brother! Of course I'm concerned! If it were me I don't even know what I would do!"

"You wouldn't give in, I don't think," Lucifer told him, eyeing him critically. "You're strong. Strong enough to resist Michael who, while he lacks my charm, commands the heavenly host and has a certain earnest appeal. If Sam were Michael's vessel I think he would have folded the moment he was told that he could help save the world."

"Oh really, even after you just said that you didn't think I'd give in?" Dean asked rhetorically. "Well say Sam doesn't think that either. Why'd even go help stop something that wasn't happening?"

"I understand Michael's many appeals to help him stop me may have confused you as to the way this works," Lucifer said. "But if Michael wanted to he could come after me right now. He won't but he could. Both here and in your world. He doesn't _need _to have his fated host any more than I do. I will do what I want and trust that it will happen in time but, if I were wrong, it wouldn't matter. Having the right host is more a matter of comfort than anything else. If one of us had the correct host and the other did not than it could play a serious role in how our battle – should it ever come to that and for me it won't – is decided because only in a true vessel can our true power be unleashed. But Michael not having Dean while I have Sam doesn't mean he doesn't have a chance, he does have more power after all, and if neither of us in possessing a Winchester then it puts us on equal ground. Sam would want to help Michael save the world even if, or maybe especially if, he thinks he can do that without having to kill his own beloved brother. Sam's just a thoughtful guy like that, aren't you, Sam?"

But Sam didn't know what to say. He wanted to say that that wasn't true. That he could be as strong as Dean and turn down Michael and his corruption and his saving the world for all the wrong reasons and with all the wrong priorities. But. But he had always prayed, growing up, and he remembered just how in awe of the angels he had been when they had first come. He remembered how badly he had needed them to be the good guys and how much he had wanted to make up for his mistakes. He remembered how much he couldn't quite share Dean's – mostly faked – certainty that they could pull this off. He didn't want to think he would be so easily manipulated but, then, he always had been in the past, hadn't he? That was what Azazel and Lilith and Ruby had been all about, hadn't it? If Dean had been the one tainted…Sam couldn't imagine his brother making those same mistakes. He'd have ganked Ruby the second she showed herself to be a demon. And wouldn't that have just made everything better?

And, whatever the angels' motives, if they truly did want to stop Lucifer and preserve at least a little (and admittedly this place with Michael and Lucifer studiously ignoring each other sort of cast doubt on that but, then, Sam supposed he could understand that)… stopping the apocalypse from happening altogether would be better but they still didn't even know where to start besides delaying things by refusing to give in.

And Lucifer was always so damn persuasive.

"I don't any interest in hypotheticals," he said finally. "Maybe me saying yes is the only thing that will get Dean to say yes but I know my brother well enough to know that if he thought he couldn't stop me from consenting to you to prompt him to do the same then he'd just go and say yes and cut out the middle man."

Lucifer grinned. "And so the plot thickens! It's almost a shame I won't be here to see the fallout!" He looked around. "Almost. I do have to say I much prefer my nice human-lite world."

"You've made your point," Sam said, trying to inject as much boredom as he could into his voice. "Blah, blah, blah, I can't say no forever. Blah, blah, blah, I really want Michael to win. Do you want to take us on a guided tour of the mess you'll make of this planet or can we just go home now?"

Lucifer dipped his head. "A little manners wouldn't be remiss, Sam, but I understand that this must be difficult to accept. Very well, I think you understand things better now."

He waved his hand lazily at them and then they were gone.

* * *

"Unbelievable," Dean raged as he threw his things onto one of the beds in their motel room. "Fucking unbelievable. They can't convince us so they fucking outsource it? Go back to that same goddamn well that didn't end up convincing me in the first place? Actually did the opposite, you know? Just showing up to harass us wasn't enough so now they're sending us to opposite ends of the world and dimension-hopping? What's next?"

"I don't know," Sam said, as calmly as he could. He carefully set his things down on the floor next to his own bed. "I guess they're getting the picture that just talking isn't going to change a thing. Maybe this is a good sign. Maybe this means that they're running out of ideas."

"Or maybe when they start bringing the powers into play it's going to be a lot harder to say no than 'you should join us, it's actually in your best interest'," Dean countered.

"Why don't you tell me about what happened the last time you were there?" Sam asked quietly. "I don't remember hearing about any of that."

Dean sighed. "It didn't matter, alright?"

Sam just stared at him. "Dean, you got sent to another reality and had to face off against Lucifer in my body who killed the other you! How can it not matter?"

"Because it is _another_ reality," Dean said. "A different one. Enough things have changed that, even in the worst case scenario, that won't be us."

"Well in that case it makes even less sense not to tell me," Sam said. "I think I can grasp the concept of an alternate dimension."

Dean looked away. "I wanted to protect you, okay?"

"From knowing that in another reality I might say yes?" Sam asked rhetorically. "In another reality, one the angels would be much less interested in showing us, I might say no. I do understand. Hearing that you said yes to Satan is a bit…alarming but it hardly proves inevitability and it's not like I'd have to see it. And I don't think I ever saw you looking as freaked out as you should after something like that."

Dean sighed. "That's because you didn't."

Sam frowned. "What do you mean?"

"This was when you were going. Right after you told me that Lucifer was after you, in fact. I was just walking along and some asshole religious guy told the angels where I was – what did he even think was going on that angels needed help finding some guy? – and Zachariah shoved me in that reality."

Sam thought he could guess where this was going.

"And what you saw convinced you that you should let me come back. You didn't change your mind on that in the other reality, did you?"

Dean closed his eyes. "I didn't. I didn't know. Of course I didn't. And I don't claim to be some sort of expert on what happened over in that reality, either. But, without knowing how that all worked out, I thought the two of us staying apart would really work. That other me never knew why you said yes but I just kept thinking about how you wanted to come back and I rejected you and…it seemed that that wasn't going to work so why not try it your way? I think it's working out better anyway."

Sam could remember all too well what it had taken to call up the brother who blamed him for the apocalypse and, for once, welcomed the chance to get rid of him. He remembered how hard it had been to tell him that Lucifer was hunting him and that he wanted to come back. He remembered staring at the phone all night, silently begging Dean to call back and change his mind. But he hadn't. If it hadn't been for, strangely enough, Zachariah then he never would have.

Sam probably had less of an idea than Dean about what made that other him say yes. But he knew he hadn't done very well in the time apart and, once denied the opportunity to go back, he couldn't imagine it would pick up any. Not with his kind of guilt and the forces chasing him and no one he could turn to.

"Yeah," he said. "What happened to everyone else? Bobby? And he said something about Cas being human?"

"The angels are total dicks is what happened," Dean said, disgusted. "I, uh, didn't get the full story on Bobby but he was gone. Chuck was still there and actually seemed to be making out pretty well. I guess he found his calling in post-apocalyptic supply management. Or maybe after it happened there were no more visions and nothing more to hide. I don't know. Cas…when the angels threw a hissy fit because I wouldn't say yes fast enough they just packed up and went home. They sealed heaven up or something and Cas stayed behind. His grace started to fail, as it's failing him now, and eventually he was little more than human. And I…and _he_. That other Dean, the one that's not me, he gave him a suicide mission and couldn't even manage to kill the devil. Then Zachariah pulled me back and when the lesson I learned was that we needed to stick together after all and fuck Michael, he was going to put me back in but Cas saved me. And then I called you and you know what happened after that."

Sam was quiet for a long moment. What could he possibly say to that? Lucifer could talk all he wanted about how he was going to do what he was going to do no matter what, and Sam did believe him, but just because he didn't have to use Sam to destroy everything didn't take any culpability away if Sam did agree. Maybe his other self hadn't seen a vision of what exactly he was agreeing to but he would have known enough. In fact, knowing that the planet was apparently 'humanity-lite' was actually not as bad as he had been expecting. If he had agreed…why would he have agreed? There would be no escape for him, that much was true. Even death wouldn't be enough if the angels brought him back. But to say yes and damn the world so he no longer had to think about it…he didn't want to be that person. He couldn't be that person. But without Dean, apparently he was. And Dean knew it. Maybe, given time, even with Dean he would still be that person.

And even if, as he had said, Dean would sacrifice himself to the angels before letting Sam give in to the devil, what would he do once Dean was gone? Once the creature wearing his brother's face wanted nothing more than for him to just embrace his destiny? Dean wouldn't be there anymore but Lucifer still would be.

No wonder Dean hadn't told him.

Or had it been a matter of trust? Dean might have welcomed him back and agreed to stop holding what had happened over his head but Sam knew that Dean didn't really think they could stop it. He put on a good show but he didn't. Did he really think that, even together, Sam could resist? He knew for a fact Sam wouldn't be strong enough to alone while Dean apparently had strength to spare and could look at the thing wearing Sam's face and still try to kill them both. And he couldn't blame Dean for that, of course he couldn't. It was the right thing.

He wished he hadn't seen that.

He needed to have seen that.

Just one more reminded of why he had to be strong, stronger than he even thought he could be.

"Do you ever wonder how this became our lives?" Sam asked idly. "I mean, sometimes I think about just what is going on and I honestly can't believe it."

"Like you wouldn't believe."

"I need some air."

Sam stood up and headed for the door. The knob wouldn't move. He tried it again. Not so much as a shake. He went over to the windows. They wouldn't budge.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked.

Sam turned back to him. "Dean. I don't think the angels are done just yet."


	8. Chapter 8

Castiel was doing everything in his, admittedly limited, power to free Sam and Dean from the motel room they had trapped them in.

He wouldn't have been able to free them even had he been operating at full strength and his strength had been slowly leeched from him for the past few months. His loyalty had always been his most admirable quality but it was quite wasted now.

Lucifer appeared on one side of him and Michael on the other.

Castiel detected them immediately. "Michael. Lucifer."

"What are you doing, dear brother?" Lucifer drawled.

To his credit, Castiel didn't flinch. Not that Michael had really expected that he would. No one who had rebelled against heaven and accepted his fading grace and yet refused to join up with hell and who allied himself only with humans could possibly be the kind that would scare easily. In his own way, Castiel was as tragic as Lucifer. Perhaps that was what angels who were not influenced by the darkness became when they lost their way.

"I am trying to save Sam and Dean."

"They don't need saving," Michael told him.

Castiel gave him a distinctly unimpressed and so very human look. "They've been trapped in this room for three weeks now."

"They haven't been praying," Michael said.

"Or summoning any demons," Lucifer added. "I know it's a bit of a risk to leave them with the materials given that they might very well just decide to start killing them. That actually doesn't bother me, though, and it could eventually be the call I'm waiting for."

"Sam and Dean have been praying a lot," Castiel said. "Unfortunately I have not been able to reply to them so they will not know that I am trying to get them out."

"Praying to you doesn't count," Michael said. "They need to pray to me or to someone else who will deliver the message to me that they have consented."

"Sam and Dean will never 'call' you," Castiel said firmly.

Lucifer shrugged. "It's only been three weeks. We have time. Who knows what they'll say after a few years stuck in there?"

"You do not act like it," Castiel said. "This looks desperate."

Desperate? Did it, really? Perhaps it did not seem as self-assured as they had been at the beginning but that was not desperate. The Winchesters could not stop them even if they never did consent and one day they would have to consent. It was their destiny. Was it desperation to tire of waiting for such small creatures to understand the bigger picture and to put aside their selfish desires in order to work towards a greater good?

Lucifer shrugged easily. "Maybe we are desperate. Desperate not to waste any more time on silly little humans and their silly little consent."

"Personally, I would much rather they stay put until they come to their senses and agree to do their duty than watching them scurry about behaving as though stopping a ghost or crossroad deal is doing more to save the world than allowing me to fight Lucifer," Michael said. "I would rather see them here than trying to stop me, for all that we know that they cannot."

"You cannot keep them there forever," Castiel said. "They will die."

"Everything dies," Lucifer said. "Minor inconvenience."

"We have left them the supplies they will need to meet their basic needs," Michael explained. "Will this have a negative impact on their psyche? That is rather the point. We need consent and they do not appear willing to offer it to us non-coerced."

"This is surely not what Father meant by consent," Castiel complained.

Michael closed his eyes, forcing down the automatic flare of fury that surged up to see this little angel presume to know what God wanted. He was not here to destroy Castiel. "Father mandated that we get consent before we could possess a vessel. He neither said nor did anything to indicate it has to be non-coerced. And as far as that goes, the vessel you are wearing now had no idea what he was agreeing to and would rather die than continue to serve as your vessel. In fact, the only reason he consented to become your vessel again was to spare his child what he saw as a terrible fate, as a good father should."

Guilt flickered across Castiel's face. "Jimmy was not brought back after Raphael killed me and Father revived me. It was a mercy. He will never get to go home but then I do not think he would have anyway."

"It doesn't matter what Father did or did not intend," Lucifer said, sounding bored.

Michael glared at him.

"Well it doesn't," Lucifer said. "We would all behave the same either way. Yes, even you, Michael, because you do not know for certain what he wanted as he never discussed it with you so you would believe the same thing regardless of if you or Castiel are right about his actual intentions. And we did not come here to argue about vessel consent anyway."

Michael reluctantly admitted that Lucifer had a point. He was certain that he was right. Who knew God better than he did? Certainly not Lucifer or he'd never have been cast out. If he didn't know what God meant when it came to angelic possession than who did? Certainly not Castiel.

"You didn't?" Castiel sounded skeptical.

"Well, not in that way," Lucifer amended. "Castiel, we think you should join us."

Castiel looked between them uncertainly. "Join both of you? Is that even possible? Has something happened that I am not aware of?"

"Not really," Lucifer said. "But you already knew that Michael and I had allied in order to convince our boys so that we could go off and kill each other in peace."

"I had heard that, yes," Castiel agreed. "But it does not make a lot of sense."

Michael still, weeks later, did not understand why that was everyone's first reaction. They had a common goal so they worked together to achieve it. Nothing made more sense than that. The fact that their common goal involved them eventually trying to kill each other was really beside the point. Some people got way too caught up in details.

"It doesn't have to," Lucifer said, quite unhelpfully. "What do you say?"

"No," Castiel said. "What did you expect me to say?"

"Well, that," Lucifer conceded. "At least at first! But we are here to persuade you!"

"Haven't I already made my choice quite clear?"

"You did," Michael said. "But it was a rash choice and a choice made it radically different circumstances. You stood before the righteous man, the one man meant to contain me, and were threatened with losing your connection with him if you did not acquiesce. It was not a situation you were prepared for and you felt guilty already for working against him and freeing his brother. You felt guilty for turning your friend Anna in, even if it was for her own good."

"It didn't _feel _like it was for her own good," Castiel said pointedly.

Ah, yes. That had ended rather badly for her, hadn't it? At least Castiel hadn't been there to see it. It might be more difficult to work around it, then. Though, really, what else could he have done? Her plan might have _worked_. He could not always be on hand to make sure she didn't escape again and succeed without his intervention. Without Sam and Dean doing what little they could to delay her, she would have succeeded.

"She escaped and would have ruined everything," Michael said simply. "Do not tell me you would have seen her succeed. You brought the Winchesters to the past to stop her."

"I didn't pretend I was helping her, at least," he bit out.

"Then maybe I did more for her than you ever did."

Castiel's shoulders tightened. "I cared about her and you killed her."

"I was never her friend," Michael said. "I did what needed to be done. And don't tell me you wouldn't have done the same if it was the only way to protect your precious friends."

Castiel frowned but said nothing.

"You had found out a lot of things you were never meant to know, things you clearly had not been ready to find out," Michael continued where he had left off. "You did not have a lot of time to decide. And, more importantly, you could have conceivably halted the apocalypse if you had succeeded. Or so you believed, of course, because there never was any stopping it. Once Dean failed, and he was always meant to, you could not simply come back but the ending became inevitable. It became clear that it was inevitable."

"You think I regret my choice?"

Michael eyed him carefully. "I think you're afraid to."

"It doesn't have to be like that, Castiel," Lucifer said persuasively. "We understand. I understand perhaps more than Michael but we understand. We all make mistakes. We all draw lines in the sand that we wish desperately we could take back. Michael's offering you the chance to do just that."

"Do we all?" Castiel asked. "Do you regret what you did?"

Lucifer smiled pleasantly at that and Michael turned to look at him fully. That was the real question, wasn't it? It wouldn't change anything, not really. Michael knew his brother too well to think that he would ever change. But to know that he at least understood where he had gone wrong! Well it would be something, wouldn't it?

"I regret some things, certainly," Lucifer said. If only Michael could trust that he actually meant that and wasn't just saying it to try and persuade Castiel. "But it's too late for me to fix any of my mistakes. It's not for you."

"That's not true. You could simply stop trying to destroy the world and there would be no choice but to end the apocalypse," Castiel said earnestly. "If you truly want to frustrate heaven, nothing would cause them more aggravation."

"Well, well," Lucifer said, chuckling. "Look who's becoming a salesman! I assure you, whatever my mistakes, wishing to wipe that blight off the face of the galaxy is not one of them."

"All will be forgiven, Castiel," Michael said. "It's not too late."

"I won't betray Sam and Dean."

"No one's asking you to!" Lucifer exclaimed.

Castiel merely blinked at them.

"We're not," Lucifer said.

"They trust me," Castiel ground out. "I'm one of the only ones they do trust and certainly the only non-human. I will not use that to convince them to play a part in destroying their world. Surely heaven's conflicts need not doom these people."

"I am trying to _protect _them," Michael said tiredly.

But Castiel shook his head. "You may tell yourself that but it isn't true. All you want to do is fight Lucifer and do your duty. If that meant destroying these people you would do so just as gladly."

"Hypotheticals are pointless," Michael said flatly. "This is the situation."

"You wouldn't be betraying them," Lucifer said again. "You would be acting against their wishes but not their interests. These humans are like children, Castiel. You know this. Think of it as being an adult trying to do what's best for children who can't understand why you're stopping them when all they want to do is stick their fingers in that outlet."

"Not getting possessed is the outlet in this situation?" Castiel asked rhetorically.

"Say they never consent," Lucifer said. "Which Sam will, at least, even if Dean doesn't. Sam was always the weak one. All it will mean is that they will suffer while we burn their world and they will suffer as we fail to convince them. They will suffer and suffer and just keep on suffering and they will not get anything for it. If they consent, their reward could be virtually anything."

"Sam and Dean aren't that selfish."

"And no one's asking them to be," Lucifer said. "They could do a lot of good with their conditions. I know they're not happy with their destinies but none of us can avoid our fates. You're not doing them any good enabling them and joining them on their mad crusade. It's anyone's guess how they truly think they can stand up against the full might of heaven and hell but it makes sense why they think they can stop fate. They don't _understand_. Not like you do."

"We can stop it."

"What part of fate have you ever stopped?" Michael challenged. "What part has anyone?"

"You could help them so much," Lucifer said. "They'd understand eventually. And even if they didn't, is their good opinion worth more to you than their well-being? Because if that's the case I think you should take a long, hard look in the mirror and ask yourself what kind of friend and advocate for humanity do you truly propose to be?"

Castiel said nothing.

That was a victory of sorts. Anyone who would be swayed so easily would never have the kind of power they needed over the Winchesters.

* * *

"I'm just saying, we might as well get something out of this," Dean argued.

"Dean, I'm not disagreeing with you."

"Bullshit, that's all you've been doing for the past three hours."

"I'm just saying, we can't just call Guinness and claim that we're doing this. There have to be, I don't know, some sort of record-keeping going on and we can't prove that this is happening because of the fact we don't want to answer any awkward questions about us being unable to leave," Sam said. "We can't explain that our food and water and toiletries keep replenishing and our clothes aren't getting dirty because I guess the angels aren't trying to be _that _much of dicks while we're trapped here. And is there even a world record for this?"

"Dude, there _has _to be a world record for longest staying in one room," Dean said.

"Well, the bathroom kind of makes it two," Sam said. He put a hand over his face. "I cannot even believe I'm having this conversation with you. I cannot even believe we've been having this conversation for three hours."

Dean frowned. "Why not? We've had _way _stupider arguments in the Impala."

"That's different," Sam said. "We weren't trapped there."

"As the passenger, you were pretty trapped," Dean said. "Subject to my every whim and whatnot."

"How long have we even been in here?" Sam asked. "I feel like I'm going crazy."

At first they tried breaking the door down. They tried every avenue of escape they could think of. They tried calling anyone and everyone. They even tried praying (but only to Castiel because they still weren't ready to give in). Nothing had worked. They didn't even know if Castiel had heard them or if that was blocked, too. At first it wasn't so bad. They could have used a break anyway and they weren't the type to need constant stimulation. Sam had actually sat down and read their dad's journal cover to cover and Dean had seen how long it took him to get raging drunk on beer.

Time passed. It got bad.

More time passed. Sam couldn't even tell if they were starting to handle it better or if they had just snapped and that was why he was no longer throwing himself at the window.

The phone rang.

Sam and Dean looked at each other blankly then lunged for it.

"How is this even possible?" Dean demanded. "We couldn't get any reception!"

"I don't know," Sam said. "Who cares, though? A link to the outside world!"

"It better not be a goddamn angel," Dean said, picking the phone up. "I don't recognize the number."

"Hello, boys," a voice came through on speakerphone.

"Do we know any British dudes?" Dean asked.

"Just that asshole who set us up and got our friends killed," Sam replied with false levity. "He's probably not even British."

"That's hurtful, it really is," Crowley said. "Attacking a man's nationality like that."

"How did you even manage to call us?" Sam demanded. "We're kind of in angel time-out right now."

"Hell has excellent reception," Crowley said. "And free Wi-Fi. We've had it long before it was actually invented, mind you. That's just what makes hell hell."

"Yeah, that wasn't really the impression I got."

"Really, Dean? You wouldn't call hell hellish?" Crowley asked politely. "Well, to each his own. Sympathies on the angel time-out. It sounds demeaning."

"That's one word for it," Dean grumbled. "What do you want? Here to sell us another toy gun to wave at the devil?"

"Hey, if this is about the Colt-"

"What else could it _possibly _be about?" Dean interrupted.

"I'll have you know that I had no idea it wouldn't work on Lucifer," Crowley said.

"Why should we believe you?" Sam demanded.

"Because how could I possibly know?" Crowley countered. "It's not like anybody's ever gone up to Lucifer and shot him with it before! The Colt's only a couple of hundred years old and Lucifer has been locked up way longer than that. I don't even know if it will work on angels. Just that nobody thought you could kill a demon – without being an angel or fellow demon, of course – and then suddenly you can. An angel technically _could _kill Lucifer but none but Michael are strong enough. Call it an honest mistake."

"Our friends _died _for your honest mistake," Dean growled.

"Hey, don't go blaming that on me," Crowley protested.

"And why shouldn't I?"

"Well for one thing, the way I heard it they died before you even came across Lucifer," Crowley said. "So even if it had all worked like a charm there was nothing you could do for them."

"It might have made their deaths worth something!"

"Nothing makes death worth anything," Crowley said dismissively.

"Can you try not to be a demon for like five seconds?" Sam asked angrily.

"I could. Probably. But why should I?" Crowley asked. "And anyway, if you have a problem with losing your little friends I'd take it up with sweet little Meg. You know, the one who killed all your childhood friends and ran off with Sam awhile back."

"Not a fan?" Dean asked.

"Never could stand a groupie," Crowley replied.

"Yeah, all that is great and all but you still haven't explained why you called us," Sam said.

"I feel like you two are ignoring the fact that I've suffered, too," Crowley said, completely ignoring the question.

"No one cares how you've suffered, Crowley," Dean said flatly.

"Well why should I care about you lot if you won't care about me?" Crowley asked.

"We didn't even ask you to care," Dean said.

"Well I did."

"No you didn't," Sam said. "You're a demon."

"Ruby was a demon."

Sam narrowed his eyes. "You do not even want to go there."

"Okay, fine, I don't actually care," Crowley said. "But I listened to you yammering on about your friends who blew themselves up so the least you can do is here what happened to me!"

"We can't exactly stop you," Sam pointed out. Well, they could always hang up on him (they probably would have already hung up on him) except that this was the first contact they had had with the outside world in far too long. Sam and Dean were close and possibly worryingly codependent but, seriously, enough was enough.

"They ate my tailor," Crowley complained. "Who even does that? Do you know how hard it is to find a quality tailor these days? And he was such a good person, too! He's not even coming down to hell and even if he were I'm a bit of a persona non grata these days because of that whole 'conspired to kill Lucifer' bit. And they burned down my house! That house was a work of art! And get this! They apparently tracked down my mother. My _mother_. And of course she joined right up with Lucifer because of course she would. Would anyone else's mother help the devil kill her only child? Possibly only child? Fuck, I don't even know if I'm her only child or not. This is just not to be borne!"

"Something something, your mother?" Dean asked. "Is she a demon, too?"

"Worse," Crowley said grimly. "A witch."

Dean shuddered. "Well for once I have to agree with you then. Witches are the worst."

"Well nobody asked you," Crowley snapped. "They are, though."

"Why did you even call us?" Sam asked once more.

"Oh, just checking in," Crowley said. "I'm not foolish enough to get anywhere near this one. It's bad enough I'm as involved as I am."

"You are not even slightly involved," Sam said.

"I was for about five minutes," Crowley said. "And that's enough. Lucifer doesn't exactly need an excuse to kill demons, you know. I've heard a lot of wild rumors about Michael and Lucifer teaming up but, I mean, that would be ridiculous, right?"

"What part of this entire situation _isn't _ridiculous?" Dean demanded.

"Huh. You may have a point there. So it's true, then?" Crowley took a moment to digest that. "Yeah, I'm definitely not crawling out from under my rock anytime soon. Best of luck, boys."

"Son of a bitch hung up on us!" Dean complained.

"Did you really want to talk to him anyway?" Sam asked.

"Being by ourselves might almost be better," Dean agreed. "But, damn it, Sammy, I wanted to hang up on him!"

* * *

"I'm running out of ideas," Michael admitted.

"You haven't tried very many," Raphael said.

"No and the Winchesters are still in their motel room where they will remain until further notice," Michael said. "But, Raphael, the whole point of doing this was to make them say yes faster. It has been weeks and we still don't have a yes."

"Perhaps you are speeding up the process," Raphael suggested. "You certainly can't be slowing it down. And if they would have taken an inordinate amount of time to say yes, which your unfortunate alliance with Lucifer suggests, then even shortening the length of time could still make it take quite some time."

"Speaking of Lucifer," Michael began.

Raphael gave him a long-suffering look. "How many more times must we go through this, Michael?"

"Until Lucifer gives it up, I suppose," Michael said. "You must admit it is a reasonable request."

"There's nothing reasonable about it," Raphael disagreed. "If he wants to see me and I do not want to see him why should his wishes supersede mine? He's the one who left. He's the one who betrayed everything that has ever mattered to any of us. He wants to kill you and if he does not he will be dead soon. I am not interested."

"He's going to keep asking," Michael cautioned.

Raphael nodded. "He's going to keep asking _you_. I have no interest in indulging him."

"This could be your last chance," Michael said. "The moment the Winchesters say yes, or possibly before if they continue to delay for too long, Lucifer is going to die. Or, as unlikely as it seems, he could kill me and you'll never want anything to do with him again."

"I don't want anything to do with him _now_," Raphael pointed out.

"I know you may not want to right now but one day you may regret not taking this chance. I would not want that for you."

"Maybe not but are you going to pretend your main concern here is me? Lucifer wants to see me and you want to facilitate our reunion whether I want to or not."

"I would never force you," Michael said solemnly. "But what is so wrong with trying to piece our fractured little family back together as much as I can?"

Raphael sighed. "It will only make it worse when one of you kills the other, you know it will. And I suppose that I cannot blame either of you for wanting it but that is not what I want."

"Very well," Michael said. "I will let the matter lie."

"For now," Raphael murmured.

"I don't know what to do," Michael said. "We can't just leave them locked in that room until they say yes indefinitely."

"I do not understand," Raphael said. "I thought that was the plan."

"It was, a bit," Michael said. "But at some point we're going to need to try to do something else or it will be unbearable. Should we wait fifty years, trying nothing else, hoping that this time they might get closer to breaking when it turns out they're unusually resistant to this kind of persuasion? And all the other forms of persuasion that we've tried but they cannot just be immune to all the kinds that there are."

"Maybe you shouldn't wait fifty years," Raphael said. "Although waiting a little longer, say a hundred, until they know that everyone they have ever loved or, for the most part, ever met is dead might be useful. Right now they can say that they are fighting to save some concrete people. They have friends. In addition to Castiel, who will age once he loses his grace completely, there is Bobby Singer, Rufus Turner, Lisa and Ben Braeden…In time, once there's no longer any need to protect these people, it may be less important to say no. We could kill them ourselves, of course, but that would set back the plan to get them to say yes."

"But if we were willing to wait one hundred years we might as well just let them go now," Michael said.

"They could make new bonds then."

"Maybe leaving them there would eventually, after decades, get me the yes I need," Michael said. "But I would like to get this done with a little sooner than that."

"As would I," Raphael agreed.

"I don't have any ideas," Michael said again. "And if Lucifer does then he's holding out on me."

"His ideas are probably too evil for you to condone anyway," Raphael said dismissively.

"I would at least like _something_," Michael said.

"Have you considered trust-building exercises?" Raphael deadpanned.

Michael stared at him. "Trust-building exercises."

"Why not?"

"Between me and Lucifer or between the pair of us and the Winchesters?"

"Why not both? There can never be too much trust in these kinds of endeavors," Raphael said.

"If you don't have any ideas or don't want to help you could just say so," Michael said.

"I really don't know what you mean, Michael. I just think that you did not disagree with my claim that Lucifer's ideas were probably evil. And it makes sense that you did not because you have not completely lost your head and his ideas probably are evil. But it does show a lack of trust between you."

"You are aware I'm sure, as you often keep reminding me of the fact, that Lucifer and I still intend to kill each other once we are done persuading the Winchesters," Michael said.

"I understand that you believe that," Raphael said.

"That's really not the same thing at all."

"It is the best I can do."

Michael strove valiantly to ignore that. "As Lucifer and I do intend to kill each other when this is over and have such radically different beliefs about everything that matters, there is only so much trust that we can have between us."

Raphael nodded. "Hence the importance of these exercises."

"And you know that the Winchesters will never trust us," Michael said. "Lucifer is their devil and Zachariah has been far too open and condescending with them. Our goals are just too different for them to want to work with me. At most, Dean will only concede once he accepts his preferred outcome is impossible."

"What I hear you saying is that you need to build up trust between you," Raphael said. "Maybe a trust fall."

Michael sighed. "I understand you were against this from the beginning but I really do need some advice here. I am supposed to meet Lucifer soon and I have nothing."

"I'm sorry but I have none to offer," Raphael said. "Gabriel might, though."

"Gabriel?"

"He understands humanity far better than I," Raphael said. "He has taken quite the creative approach to dispensing justice and being the Messenger of God. And, more importantly, he thinks differently enough from the rest of us that he should be able to see new solutions where I could not."

"That isn't a bad plan," Michael said. "Thank you."

* * *

Gabriel was surprised how quickly he had gone from freaking out, though hopefully low-key enough that no one had noticed, when Michael and Lucifer appeared in front of them to getting annoyed by it. Sure, he loved his brothers and theoretically wouldn't be adverse to spending time with them. But all they wanted to do was pester him in some way about how he wasn't living up to his potential or doing his duty and by the way did they know that they were having an apocalypse?

"Now what?" Gabriel asked, sighing.

"I could be wrong, Michael, but I don't think our brother is pleased to see us," Lucifer said.

"Just catching onto that now, are you?" Gabriel asked rhetorically. "Well, I always knew you weren't all that smart."

"Careful, Gabriel."

"What? Are you really trying to tell me that landing locked in a cage while humanity is free to grow for thousands of years was the kind of payoff you wanted?"

"Maybe we could move past the insults," Michael suggested smoothly. "Or at least not open up with them."

"You always were a realist," Gabriel replied. "Fine. What do you want? But if this is about the apocalypse then I swear-"

"It is," Michael interrupted.

Gabriel threw his hands into the fair. "For the love of God! There is something seriously wrong with you two!"

"That isn't the first time I've heard that," Lucifer replied. "Though usually Michael isn't being lumped in right alongside me."

"You don't talk to the Winchesters enough," Gabriel said. He reconsidered what he had said. "Scratch that, you talk to them too much as it is and they still want you to get lost but you clearly don't talk to them about the right things."

"I don't understand what the love of God has to do with what you said or what we said," Michael said, politely puzzled.

Gabriel made a face. "Oh, well that's just an expression."

"Of God's love?"

"It actually has nothing to do with God at all," Gabriel said. "The humans use it."

Michael and Lucifer made the exact same face and shuddered in unison. Would they just grow up? How many problems would be solved if they could?

"It sounds disrespectful," Michael said reprovingly. "What does it even mean?"

"It's, I don't know, an exclamation of surprise or frustration. Or frustrated surprise."

"Why did people start saying it?" Michael demanded.

"Do I _look _like an etymology expert?"

Lucifer tilted his head. "Well, of the three of us, yes."

"Can we just move on?" Gabriel asked, sighing. Could angels even get headaches? He was beginning to feel a headache coming on. "Can't you two talk about something other than the apocalypse for five freaking minutes?"

"We were speaking of etymology a moment ago," Lucifer said. "Maybe we did not manage to do so for a full five minutes but you stopped us in the middle of that conversation so it's really your fault there."

"The apocalypse is at the forefront of our minds at all times," Michael said. "It is shameful that it is has not yet properly begun."

"How long do you really think you two would fight for?" Gabriel asked. "Say everything went perfectly and Sam was there for the taking when Lucifer returned and Dean, in his grief, said yes as well. Isn't the apocalypse too big of a deal to really take like an hour?"

"It would be longer than that," Lucifer said. "If nothing else, I would need time to marshal my forces."

"I see no need to draw it out," Michael said. "But either way, your point is moot because it has been months and very little apocalypsing has been done."

"And none of it by you," Lucifer said.

"Destroying humanity is your part of this fight and not mine," Michael said.

"Well you've spectacularly failed to protect it," Lucifer said.

"I protected the Winchesters."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "That doesn't even begin to count. We need them."

"My angels have killed some demons," Michael offered.

"Killed any yourself?"

Michael gave him a look. "My mere unhosted presence is enough to kill literally any demon. Why should I lower myself to doing that personally?"

"While that is a fair and valid point, it still doesn't actually count on you doing anything about the apocalypse."

Michael turned to Gabriel who, honestly, had no interest in being dragged into this argument. He never did and his brothers just never listened. "That's why we're here. We have run out of ways to make them say yes."

Gabriel raised his hands. "Hey, what part of neutrality says to you that I would be fine helping convince your errant vessels for you?"

Michael blinked at him, appearing honestly confused. "It had been our understanding that by neutral you meant that you would not choose between all of heaven and I and Lucifer – for surely the demons do not appeal to you – and not that you would not choose between your family and the humans."

"I can handle you being neutral," Lucifer said. "Inasmuch as such a thing exists and which really puts you on Michael's side."

"Yes, you can handle me being neutral," Gabriel said under his breath.

"But I cannot and will not have a brother who will side with those…those _things_ over us."

Gabriel turned to Michael. "I'm being threatened."

Michael sighed. "_Lucifer_."

"And as for choosing things over us, what do you call the demons you work with?"

"My minions," Lucifer said easily. "They sided with me, not the other way around. I intend to kill them last."

"I'm not on humanity's side," Gabriel said though the words tasted wrong in his mouth. Was humanity even really a side? Despite Sam and Dean's best – and rather impressive – efforts it really wasn't. "I just won't get involved."

"It will just help us move up the time table," Lucifer said persuasively.

Gabriel crossed his arms. "Yeah until you two geniuses go and murder each other. Thanks but no thanks." After a moment he added, "Besides, I already struck out with the wondertwins."

Michael and Lucifer exchanged startled looks.

"This is news to me," Michael said.

"I was hiding and so were they," Gabriel said, shrugging. "It was a few months ago now, when they ended up figuring out what I really was and trapping me in some holy fire until I agreed to let them and little Castiel go. I'm not really eager to jump back into that snake pit."

"From the sounds of it, they were only able to trap you because you had not anticipated that they would figure out you were an angel and somehow get their hands on holy oil," Michael said. "And, indeed, I suspect were it not for Castiel's involvement they would not have."

"Oh, he recognize me right away, of course," Gabriel said. "So I dealt with him. And apparently dealing with him so efficiently was a little on the suspicious side. They have so much faith in him, even oozing grace. Whoops."

"So this time it would be different," Michael insisted. "This time you don't let them put you in that position. You can bend their reality and you know not to underestimate them. That's how Lucifer and I have managed to not be so easily trapped."

"I've never been _easily _trapped," Lucifer felt the need to point out. As if anyone thought that he was. Well, anyone present. Knowing the Winchesters, there was a good chance if they hadn't made an ill-advised and borderline suicidal crack about Lucifer and time-out then they would before this was over. "You remember what you had to do to get me the first time."

Michael nodded gravely.

"You're probably right," Gabriel said. "But I'm still not doing it. Why should I? They're your vessels – or they could be, right now it's far from certain – so I shouldn't have to do the heavy lifting."

"We're not saying you have to or that we even want you to," Michael said placatingly.

"Although if you wanted to do that then that would be fine, too," Lucifer added.

"We just would like some advice, maybe an outside perspective. One that knows humans better and found something to appreciate about them," Michael said.

"And I think we all know that you must have been looking _really _hard," Lucifer said.

"You two are stumped, aren't you?" Gabriel asked, smirking.

"They're quite unreasonable," Michael said, not even bothering to deny it.

"I'm still not sure I should help," Gabriel said slowly. "I mean, neutrality!"

"That's not even real," Lucifer said.

"And besides, what do you call attempting to make Sam Winchester less codependent with his brother right before Dean went to hell so as to try and avoid Ruby's priming?" Michael asked.

They had him there. Gabriel spread his hands and adopted a guileless expression he was sure that they saw right through. "Hey, we all knew the apocalypse was going to be a buzzkill. I'm not a fan of calling the cops right when things are getting good! I refuse to apologize for being who I am."

"Am I law enforcement in this scenario?" Lucifer wondered idly.

"It's in the name of fairness," Michael said. "And in the name of not having to deal with us while we attempt to persuade you. We have a lot of time while we're waiting for Sam and Dean to crack."

Gabriel sighed. They really were being remarkably lenient with him given his blatant refusal to contribute. Yes they loved him but they loved each other more and were _still _plotting to kill each other. Better not push them too far. And it's not like the Winchesters even had a real plan anyway. "Fine. Have you tried being nice to them?"

Lucifer stared at him. "Have we tried _what_?"

Gabriel sighed again. Big surprise, really. "I'll take that as a no, then."

"I have," Michael said. "I brought Sam back to life and I even erased John and Mary's memories of that whole experience. And while Dean may have been upset because that meant his mother wouldn't know to avoid her death in 1983. But that couldn't be allowed anyway so why upset her with what was to come? And I have made every effort to be nice but he does not care. Thwarting fate is more important to him than manners."

Gabriel rolled his eyes. "Well that's because I didn't mean just manners!"

"What did you mean then?" Lucifer asked.

"I don't know," Gabriel said. Did he really have to do all the work for them? "Don't they have a friend that's paralyzed or something? Couldn't you fix that? It wouldn't hurt the cause or personally offend you like, say, restoring Castiel might and it's something they could never do on their own. It would cost you nothing and would really force them to acknowledge you're not a complete dick all of the time."

"I could look into that," Michael said. "Assuming we ever decide to let them out of the motel room."

"Yeah, I think all the plans are going to hinge on that," Gabriel said. "It's not like I have a magic word that causes consent to share."

"I want another idea," Lucifer said.

Of course he didn't like the one that involved healing the human. "Do they even know what paradise is?"

"What do you mean? Why wouldn't they?" Michael asked.

"Human imagination is somewhat limited and their religions get so much wrong," Gabriel explained. "Sure having most of the human race die would be a total bummer but maybe if they saw what would become of Earth and the remains of the human race they'd be less against it."

"That would only work if Michael won," Lucifer pointed out.

"Lucifer, this will only _ever _work if they count on Michael winning. You don't even try to hide how disastrous you would be for their people."

"Yes but I wouldn't go after the two of them personally," Lucifer said. "I would probably even spare Castiel, for all his losing his grace is an abomination, because he's just like me and he didn't choose to be human."

"They're a little more big picture kinds of guys than that," Gabriel said.

Lucifer snorted. "Are you sure? See what happens when you make them choose between their brother and the world."

"Didn't Sam run off with Ruby after punching the crap out of Sam in order to try and save the world?" Gabriel asked.

"That started off as more of a vengeance for Dean's death quest," Lucifer clarified. "And he just wasn't able to properly incorporate Dean coming back to life into that and ended up attacking Dean so he could go avenge his death in peace. Humans."

"Then there's some other people you could consult," Gabriel said. "Anna, perhaps."

"Anna is dead," Michael said flatly.

Gabriel waited but no more was forthcoming. "What's your point?"

"Dead angels do not go to heaven," Michael said. "Dead angels…I do not know what becomes of them. I cannot imagine Father would let them be destroyed and they do not go to purgatory, either. They are beyond our reach and cannot be consulted."

"You could go back in time and not kill her so very easily I'm having a hard time accepting you're really complaining about this," Gabriel said. "I mean, do what you want but if you want an angel that truly understands humanity I wouldn't go with the guy pretending to be a demigod all this time but the one who was actually human. Who was raised human and thought like a human, too, and not just out of grace juice like a certain other angel I could mention."

"She tried to prevent Sam and Dean from ever having been born," Michael said. "If she comes back she can try again. It's too dangerous."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "We'll keep an eye on her. Or we'll go back in time and stop her from succeeding if she does succeed. We, at least, would know the difference between a world with the Winchesters and one without them."

"I'm surprised you're so eager to talk to a human angel," Michael said.

Lucifer shrugged. "Not eager, perhaps, but it could be interesting. Almost like meeting with Castiel. It's just such a fascinated pity."

"Do you have any other ideas?" Michael asked him.

Gabriel threw his hands up in the air. "What do I look like, an idea factory?"

Michael and Lucifer just looked at him.

Gabriel shook his head. "If all else fails, you could always just erase their memories and start again, maybe try not to be such dicks next time. It's asking a lot, I know, but fortunately you can just keep erasing it every time you mess up!"


	9. Chapter 9

"Didn't you feel at all weird about binding Death?" Michael asked. They were in the middle of the desert for no better reason than that there were no humans there.

Lucifer frowned. "No. Why, do you think I should have?"

"Well it's not so much a question of should, although for the record yes you absolutely should have, as it is me not being able to understand how that didn't bother you," Michael said.

"I had always planned on it doing that," Lucifer said. "Ever since the apocalypse was decided on so long ago. I needed to bind the four horsemen and Death is one of the horsemen. Why should I feel weird about binding him and not any of the others?"

"None of the horsemen can ever truly cease to exist, of course," Michael said. "Not so long as humanity exists."

"So they'll be gone soon," Lucifer said. "Strange how they don't seem at all concerned about this. I suppose they're not normal creatures and not everything that exists has to prioritize its own existence."

"It might be a little odd if such inherently destructive things did," Michael said. "But Death will be fine. And you know why he's different."

Lucifer crossed his arms stubbornly. "Do I? Because I don't think I do."

"He existed before we did," Michael said. "And there aren't many beings that can claim that. Death, Father, the Leviathan, the darkness…it's a short list. We don't even know if he existed before Father."

"Or so he says," Lucifer said impatiently. "Isn't it obvious that He must have created Death?"

"I don't think so," Michael said. "He created most things but not everything. Not the darkness either."

"But if He wanted to he could have completely stopped anything from ever dying," Lucifer said. "How can Death have been there and exist outside of God? Do you believe his story about how he'll reap God one day, too?"

"I don't know," Michael admitted. "It seems impossible but I've lived long enough to see hundreds if not thousands of things I once thought would be impossible come to pass. Father dead? Raphael already believes that. Father dead? He already left and I never thought that was possible. I suppose eventually it might happen but I won't be there to see it. Maybe it will happen, impossibly far from now. Even by our standards."

Michael and his fears. It would serve him right if such a day did come and he had to see it. Where would Michael be once he had to admit that his idol had fallen? He certainly had no sympathy for Lucifer trying to come to grips with the very same thing. Something told Lucifer that his brother would not take the knowledge half so well as he had though they couldn't all be Raphael who absorbed the disappointment and then carried on like nothing had happened.

"I don't see why it matters," Lucifer told him. "It's all baseless speculation and we won't find out for a long, long time. It's not as though Death will come to brag should he succeed. And if God never dies he will never be proven wrong as he could simply say the time is not right. Until God dies it could always be a future event. We'll just never know unless the answer is yes and I don't fancy living through whatever could kill God."

Michael was clearly unhappy with that but he reluctantly nodded. "But the fact that we are even discussing whether Death could kill Father…Death isn't like the others. He can kill us and easily."

"He can't kill me," Lucifer said smugly. "I made sure of it. And not to worry, I won't send him after you or the others."

"You bound him. Death of all things."

"I had to," Lucifer explained patiently. "He's a horseman. I don't make the rules."

"He can't go after you right now," Michael agreed. "But _you bound Death_."

"You keep saying that."

"It keeps being true and you clearly don't understand the repercussions of this!" Michael exclaimed.

"Repercussions? What repercussions?"

"One day he won't be bound anymore. And I don't know if he's the kind to take offense but how exactly would you react if you were bound by anything? Let alone the lesser lifeforms you know Death sees us as."

"I have it under control," Lucifer said calmly. He would be damned before he admitted Michael had a point. What was he supposed to do, anyway? He wasn't _mistreating _Death. He couldn't go back and unbind him and letting him go now would just make binding him in the first place pointless. Not to mention that he would be risking his life by giving Death the means to kill him. Did Death hold a grudge? It was impossible to tell. "I still think we should erase Sam and Dean's memories and start over."

Michael gave him a look that said that he saw straight through him but he let the subject change slide. "We already talked about this. It will make everything we've tried so far completely pointless."

"The fact that they still haven't said yes makes everything we've tried so far completely pointless," Lucifer said. "Unless you think we're slowly wearing them down but how much do we need to wear them down? If we could just make them forget their initial resistance to us it would make this go so much faster. We started off with so much working against us."

"Erasing their memories of the ways angels have caused problems for them in the past and the fact we do want this apocalypse to happen might solve my problem but it won't solve yours," Michael pointed out. "And I'm not ready to quit just yet."

"It's not about quitting," Lucifer said, rolling his eyes. "And if you're really worried about what people might think, they'd think far worse of us if we continue to fail to persuade them than if we just give them a little help getting over their petty problems. Besides, we could maybe erase a bit more and not have to work against the anti-devil indoctrination they've been swimming in their entire lives."

Michael raised his eyebrows incredulously. "How extensive of a mind-wipe are we talking about here? Do you just want to give them complete amnesia?"

"Well that depends," Lucifer replied. "Do you think that complete amnesia would make them any more likely to say yes to us?"

"No, we're not doing that," Michael decided. "We are not that desperate. Not yet."

"Why is that when we disagree the fact you don't want to do it means I can't do it?" Lucifer demanded.

Michael drew back, surprised. "We're allies in this so we need to agree on a course of action."

"And when we don't agree your no means more than my yes," Lucifer said bitterly. "And when we do agree we also do what you want since we both want it. It seems to me that you're calling all the shots here."

"I am not," Michael said. "You just haven't shot down any of my ideas."

"Maybe some of us are trying to be supportive."

"Oh, you always do this!" Michael burst out.

"Do what?" Lucifer asked. This he had to hear.

But Michael just sighed. "Lucifer-"

"No, come on, Michael. I want to hear it. Kid gloves off."

"There's really no point-"

"See, there you go again! We disagree but you don't want to have it out so we're just not going to do it. Go ahead, tell me my complaint has no merit. I dare you."

"Nothing constructive is going to come of that!" Michael exclaimed.

"Why does something constructive _have _to?" Lucifer demanded. "What do I always do?"

"You take every little time something doesn't go your way, no matter how small or innocuous it is, and you twist it around in your head until there's this vast conspiracy against you and you're the victim. You were out there defying God and twisting souls and then you have the gall to act like you're being persecuted when you're found out!"

"Come on, Michael, tell me how you really feel," Lucifer goaded.

"What did you seriously expect would happen? Did you think that no one would ever find out? Maybe you could hide your activities from us, though with Lilith's obsession with you I doubt it, but from God? How arrogant do you have to be? Of course he would find out. What was your ideal outcome? Humanity getting destroyed, of course. Was Father supposed to look at the mess you managed to drag forth from humanity after years of torture and decide the whole species did not deserve to exist? Was he supposed to look at what an angel did and blame humanity? Even if he did, do you really think he would just let what you did go unanswered? Did you expect some sort of praise for 'opening his eyes' about his favorite creation?"

What had he expected? It was hard to remember. At first, he hadn't understood how such an obviously flawed species like the humans could even be suffered to live, much less as the favorites. But perhaps if they had been relegated to their proper place it would not have been so obscene. At first he had just tried to point it out but God had been strangely unwilling to hear him. He hadn't understood but he had kept trying. Time and time again until both of their patience was running out. By the end, could he think of anything other than finally opening his father's eyes to the truth?

"Maybe by that point it didn't matter to me," Lucifer admitted. "Maybe by that point I just needed him to see that I was _right_."

"He didn't. You weren't."

"Please, Michael, spare me," Lucifer scoffed. "You have no more love for the humans than I do."

"I trust Father."

"He's not perfect. It was a hard truth I had to learn but I've come to terms with it by now and you may not like it but it makes infinitely more sense than you continuing to cling to the idea you know what he'd want. It's been too long and things change. We've all changed and maybe even he has. The situations we're dealing with are things that never occurred under him. You're making this all up as you go along and maybe he'd agree with you and maybe he wouldn't but you just don't know."

"I know he wants me to stop you," Michael said. "I know he wants me to keep heaven together. What more do I need to know than that?"

"Ah, that's quite a different tune from 'I know I must kill rogue angels because it is Father's wish'."

Michael's grace flared. "He wanted me to stop you. Why would he want any less for other traitors?"

"Why would he lock me up for thousands of years and then want you to so quickly kill the others?" Lucifer countered.

"Father loved you best," Michael admitted, bowing his head. "I've thought a lot about it and I believe that He wanted you to change. You didn't. Why would any of the others?"

"Quite the impressive sample size you've got there, Michael," Lucifer drawled. "Especially seeing as how none of the others possessed my conviction."

"You would argue for the fallen," Michael said. "Are you going to plead for Castiel, too?"

"I don't plead," Lucifer retorted coldly. "Now that you mention it, however, he seems to fall more in line with that whole 'love humanity' crap that started all of this in the first place."

It amazed him that Michael couldn't see the hypocrisy of it. Admittedly, Michael had long-since been slow to pick up on the way that his actions didn't always make sense but this was taking it to another level. All of this had begun because they had been happy and things had been perfect until God had decided to create little monsters and demand that all of the angels bowed down before them. Oh, they all did – Michael the very first to kneel – but they hadn't meant it. They had bowed to the humans as though they were God's proxy and not given it another thought. But Lucifer was different than that. These things _meant _something and could not be done lightly and forgotten. He had principles where the rest had only obedience and if God were truly so enamored of the humans and their precious free will then how could he judge Lucifer for exercising his?

God had, clearly taking leave of his senses, commanded them to love and protect humanity. Well how had that worked out? The angels, from what Lucifer could tell, left Earth thousands of years ago and had not interfered until Castiel brought Dean Winchester back to life. There were exceptions, of course. Gabriel and others on the run. But the policy of heaven was to stay out of earthly affairs and while that might be better for the humans than what Lucifer would have done, it hardly fit the bill of protecting them, either. It might be one thing if they had left the humans to hurt and kill each other but the angels hadn't so much as lifted a finger to stop the ghosts or demons or vampires or any of the rest from targeting them, either. And as for love…some of them might pretend harder than others but love was something the angels had in short supply when it came to those creatures.

Castiel, poor misguided Castiel, was the only one he knew of that came close to following that final order. He may have his suspicions about Gabriel but at least inflicting cosmic justice against evildoers (or just those whose actions Gabriel didn't happen to agree with) wasn't helping their species. And the angels would cast out and destroy Castiel for this. Lucifer couldn't fault them in their actions but it did make their need to cast him as the villain ring rather hollow.

_They didn't even disagree_.

"Humanity had nothing to do with any of this."

Lucifer actually laughed. "I would love to hear how you came to that conclusion."

"It was the catalyst, yes, but that could have been anything. It was never _really _about the humans."

"That explains so much about you," Lucifer told him. "Go ahead, tell me what it was _really _about?"

"It was about loyalty," Michael, stalwart as ever, said. "It was about faith and it was about obedience. Father said to bow before the humans and you refused. More than that, you sought their destruction."

"You really think this is about something so petty as obedience?" Lucifer couldn't believe it. Although maybe, knowing Michael, he could. How could he have so fundamentally misunderstood the situation? No wonder he had refused to stand with him.

"There is _nothing _petty about obedience!" Michael insisted. "Obedience is what we were created for. When we are obedient, we do not have problems. It is only when you broke away that everything began to fall apart! You fell and Father left then Gabriel did, too. Everyone began to look to me for answers but how could I possibly fill Father's shoes? I'm not-" He cut himself off, looked away.

Of course it was impossible for any of them to be God. The only problem was that Michael had still tried.

"It wasn't about obedience," Lucifer said after a moment. "How could it have been? Free will was one of the things He was most excited about in the little humans. He didn't even seem to mind all the terrible ends that free will led them to. Why would it be alright for them and not for me?"

"You don't think it was alright for them," Michael pointed out.

"And yet we're not talking about me."

"They never tried to overthrow Father."

"And neither did I," Lucifer said. "Besides, I remember hearing something about a tower."

"We had nothing to do with that," Michael claimed. "I disagree with you about what your rebellion was really about but ultimately it doesn't matter. Obedience or your mad need to destroy humanity, it's all the same."

"It wasn't mad," Lucifer argued. "I was the _only _one who loved Father enough to try and make him understand what he was doing. I was trying to save him from that filth."

Michael's grace flashed. If any humans had been present, it probably would have killed them. They were always so fragile. "Don't you _dare _tell me that I didn't love him every bit as much as you did! If anything, the fact that I stayed while you threw everything away because you couldn't deal with the humans shows that you didn't love him as much as you said you did."

"You think I threw everything away?" Lucifer demanded. "That implies choice. Intention."

"You certainly made your choice," Michael said darkly.

"I made my choice to walk away and try to force Father to listen to me, try to prove that I was right if he could not see the sense of my words," Lucifer said. "I never chose to be banished."

"You don't have to choose a punishment to deserve it! A human kills another human and spends their life in prison. They may not have chosen prison but they chose to kill and knew there would be consequences if they were caught. You knew there would be consequences. Maybe not precisely what those consequences are but are you saying you would have done it had the punishment been time in heaven's jail and not being locked away in the depths of hell?"

"I didn't choose to be cast out," Lucifer said again.

"It was pride, not love," Michael accused.

"What's wrong with pride? You have plenty of it yourself. But the two don't conflict."

"You couldn't stand to be asked to bow to those you felt were so worthless. It didn't matter it was symbolic and just doing what Father told us to. You refused to bow and He let you get away with it. All the rest of us bowed, most after you had already refused with no consequences."

Lucifer laughed bitterly. "I would hardly call what happened no consequences."

"There you go again! Pretending that your punishment was from refusing to bow and that refusing to bow was about not being able to love the humans as much as we did Him."

"Maybe I'm just more honest than you," Lucifer said. "None of you _ever _kept that promise. Not even Castiel, I don't believe. Not yet. But go ahead, rebuke me for not lying to Father's face."

"No, you just lie to yourself," Michael said. "We tried. We did the best we could and that's all He ever asked of us. All He ever asked of you. You hated the humans and you wouldn't even pay lip service to glorifying them. Had He just ordered us to love them full stop you still would have refused."

"I guess we'll never know, will we?"

"And your little narrative of loving Father too much to love humans equally and being cast out for that conveniently ignores that Father just looked at you with disappointment and let it go. It conveniently ignores that you couldn't handle that and set out to prove him wrong and created demons. It conveniently ignores that when you were caught you were given the chance to apologize and waged war against us instead. Angel against angel, brother. You made us that. And you're still not even sorry."

"I'm sorry it came to that," Lucifer said. "Which, I suppose, is on true apology. But why should I apologize for being right? Surely you can't deny that I was right about the humans. Not now."

"It isn't up to us whether they deserve to live or to die," Michael said sternly.

"No," Lucifer said, darkly amused. "Just whether they actually live or die. And what business did He have being disappointed in me? _I _was disappointed in _him_."

"And what gives you that right? What makes you think you know better than our Father who created you? Created everything?"

"What gives me the right? He did, I suppose, when he gave me the ability to choose. And what makes me think I know better? His track record. At least I'm still here. At least I still _care_."

"You care about yourself," Michael accused. "You care about your perceived slights."

"My perceived-" Lucifer broke off and almost couldn't continue. "What, exactly, is so _perceived _about being thrown away like so much used garbage and left to rot for thousands of years? Maybe you didn't stop my people but if it weren't for them, for twisted human souls, I'd still be _down_ there! And don't you dare claim that I don't still care about you all, despite how little you deserve it."

"How little we deserve it," Michael repeated. "Yes, you're convincing me. You brought war and death to us. If you truly cared, how could you have done such a thing?"

"You brought it just as much by refusing to listen."

"Refusing to just give in and go along with your treachery," Michael countered.

"Some things matter more than love and affection."

"Yes," Michael agreed. "And for you that was your sick obsession with destroying humanity. Do you know how many angels Uriel killed in your name?"

"I wasn't even there," Lucifer said. "I bear no blame for that."

"You were cast out, Lucifer, for refusing to stop and refusing to learn. You were cast out for rebelling multiple times against Father and in the end for bringing fire to heaven. You will never change. How can you when you don't even acknowledge what you did and why? You'd have us all cry for you, the one true angel who just couldn't bring himself to bow before a flawed species and love them as much as he loved God. You play the victim so well, brother, for one of the strongest beings in all of existence."

"See, what really gets to me is that even if that were true – and it's not-"

"Of course not," Michael said mockingly.

"Then you still gave up on me."

"What else was I supposed to do?" Michael demanded. "You had defied Father. More than once! You had taken to arms! You were never sorry for a second of it. And I tried to entertain the idea that maybe you had come to your senses in the thousands of years since we had last seen each other but then I saw that you were working with demons, of all things, to get free and your plans haven't changed. Am I still supposed to believe that this isn't a tremendous problem? Am I supposed to be waiting around for you to realize what you're doing? If you haven't understood it by now then expecting you to ever do so would be optimistic to the point of foolishness."

"Of course I was working with demons!" Lucifer said, throwing his hands up in the air. "What kind of options did I have? It had been thousands of years and it was clear no one else was coming. Father had long since left. And my avenues of communication were limited. When that little demon came to me, of course I wasn't about to turn down his offer of help."

"If you had just changed your ways like you were meant to-" Michael started to say.

"Then what, Michael? If I had been blindly obedient Father would have returned to free me? He did interfere with the Winchesters earlier. Maybe the cage had some sort of repenting condition where if I had changed it would have freed me. We don't know and so it doesn't matter."

"You can hardly expect anyone to have let you free when you wanted to destroy everything just as much as ever!" Michael cried out.

"I don't expect anything from _Him_," Lucifer spat. "He made his priorities clear. But you, Michael? I must confess to finding myself disappointed."

"Disappointed," Michael repeated slowly. "What right do you have to be disappointed with me?"

"I've spent a lot of time learning about my vessel," Lucifer said. "You know I like to be through and do things properly. And, given how codependent the Winchesters are, I've learned quite a bit about your vessel as well."

"What's your point?"

"It's truly amazing," Lucifer said. "Sam Winchester has done a lot that you would think would drive his brother away. He ran away from the life and didn't contact them because of a fight he had had with their father. He abandoned his brother again because his brother wanted to be good and obedient and he wanted to go find him instead. He failed to kill Azazel when he had a chance leading to his father dying anyway but this time with his soul earmarked for hell and Dean bearing the guilt of being the cause of that deal. He ran away to go use his powers and left Dean behind again. He got himself killed because he was careless and Dean had to sell his soul to get him back. We all know what happened to Dean down there. Sam promised that he wouldn't use his powers anymore but lied and went gunning for Lilith. He worked with Ruby and lied about that, too. Lied about killing demons and sometimes humans and literally drinking demon blood. When Dean found out, Sam lied about stopping. He chose revenging himself against Dean's killer over the wishes of the very much alive Dean. At the end of the day, he chose a demon over his own brother. He knocked Dean down and left with a demon. He freed me. He was the only one who could have. When this world burns, it will be all his fault. And he will say yes to me. Dean knows it, even if he pretends not to."

"What's your point?" Michael asked again. "That your vessel resembles you and all the various ways you've betrayed me?"

Lucifer smiled tightly. "Not at all, Michael. What I wanted to draw your attention to was that, despite every little stupid thing Sam's done, Dean has still stood by him. Oh, they've fought and taken opposing sides, sure. But through it all, no matter how done Dean thinks he is or how much he could just quit caring, he has never and will never give up on his brother. He can't. Even when he knows how it's all going to end, he can't help himself. Doesn't sound very much like you, does it?"

Michael looked as though Lucifer had struck him.

"That," he said when he could finally speak, "is not the same thing at all. Sam may have messed up but his heart was always in the right place. Even at the end, when he kept choosing Ruby and freed you, he was being lied to and manipulated. It took months and Lilith was a true threat. In addition to killing his brother, he knew she was trying to free you and had no reason to believe killing her would be what actually did it. I wouldn't put it past her to try and destroy the world to motivate Sam to kill her if he didn't go for it. And had Sam chosen Dean, he still would have killed Lilith and started all of this though then perhaps Dean wouldn't be so quick to absolve himself."

"And my heart wasn't in the right place?" Lucifer demanded.

"No."

"I just wanted to make things perfect again."

"I know very well what you wanted," Michael said crisply. "And it's also a matter of scale. Sam never tried to destroy any worlds. Even the credit he's getting for helping with the apocalypse is only because he freed you. You're the one who will destroy this place."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "And, what? The little monkeys are morally superior because they can't do what I can do?"

"No, of course not. But it does make my position rather different form Dean's and it does mean we have added responsibility not to misuse our greater power."

"Nothing you do is ever a misuse of power, though, is it," Lucifer said sarcastically. "The details may be different. They always are. But at the end of the day I have to face the fact that a flawed human has more love for and faith in his equally flawed brother than you _ever _did in me."

"I didn't have a choice!" Michael insisted. "Lucifer, you were waging war against our Father! I could have sympathized with you, perhaps, for some of it but I could never go as far as you did. I cannot say I always understood Father's choices. But to actually rebel? I couldn't."

"You could have," Lucifer said firmly. "All this talk about how I'm pretending, well what about you?"

"What _about _me?" Michael asked. "I did the best I did with the situation. I didn't want any of it but you forced my hand. I could never have stood against Father."

"There's that word again. 'Could' when you actually mean 'would.' You had a choice to make, Michael. And I know it wasn't an easy choice and I know it was the last thing you wanted. I'm almost sorry that I put you in that position to choose but choose you did."

"I didn't," Michael insisted.

"You could have done anything. You chose Him."

"It wasn't choosing. I did what I had to do."

"You betrayed me," Lucifer said mildly. "The least you could do is be honest about it."

"_You _betrayed _me_!" Michael shouted.

"I don't know how you can stand there and, all betrayal aside, pretend that when I asked you to stand by my side and Father probably didn't even bother to say anything you didn't have a choice."

"I was always going to stand with Father."

"That is always the choice you will make," Lucifer agreed. "I know that now. I was a fool to think you would ever do otherwise, even for me."

"It's not like that," Michael said, frustrated.

"Then tell me what it's like," Lucifer said. "Strange truth to be so hard to put into words."

"Free will is an illusion," Michael said, sounding as if he'd told himself this many times before. "It's one of your favorite vanities but it's not true. I understand it's easier to think that you chose this fate, for all you insist you did not. But you were always going to rebel and I was always going to stop you. It's a tragedy and I wish so much that we could do something else but we can't. It's not just a matter of won't. We _can't_."

"If I was always going to rebel, if it's fate, it's clearly not my fault," Lucifer said. "And yet you still blame me as though it were."

"Maybe it's not your fault you were a monster," Michael said. "But surely you can still hate people for what they do even if they don't choose to be the kind of people who would one day grow into those acts."

"Do you?" Lucifer asked quietly.

"Do I what?"

"Hate me, Michael."

"I…" Michael trailed off. "Of course not. You know that."

"Do I?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "You have a funny way of showing it. I think it really is won't, you know."

"I know you do," Michael said tiredly.

"But if things _won't _change because I know I'm right and I will not let the matter drop after all of this and you won't cease your unthinking and unfeeling obedience to a Father who has long since deserted you then how could you even know if it's won't or can't?"

"If we won't for various reasons then clearly the situation is can't. Maybe even can't because of won't if you can forgive the contradiction."

"So I rebelled because I was meant to and it's still my fault Father left? Who do you think created my fate if not me?"

"I don't want to hear it, Lucifer," Michael told him.

"Of course not. Not from me. How it would _burn _to have to admit to being wrong after all this time."

Michael said nothing.

"Still, perhaps we can consult a third party."

"A third party? Who? Raphael still won't see you."

"This isn't about that," Lucifer insisted. "Why would it be? Raphael would mindlessly parrot anything you said, especially to me. And Gabriel might have something interesting to say but that would come too close to taking sides."

"Then what do you suggest?"

"Why not take it to a human?" Lucifer suggested. "They're touted as the free will experts. And what human is closer to God than a prophet?"

Surprise flashed across Michael's face. "A prophet? You mean-"

Then Lucifer was gone.

* * *

Michael was convinced that this was a terrible idea. Going to a human? For advice when he and Lucifer disagreed? He wasn't convinced a human would have any special insights anyway nor was he sure this wouldn't end badly. Yes, they could bring Chuck Shurley back to life but would that still prompt the choosing of a new prophet? And they were supposed to _protect _this one, not kill him. Did Lucifer still care about things like that? Actually, come to think of it, had Lucifer _ever _cared about things like that?

Chuck dropped his glass when Michael and Lucifer appeared in the middle of the living room and Michael moved it to the table.

"H-hi," Chuck said, smiling nervously. "You must be Michael. And Lucifer. Lucky me, getting to meet all the archangels."

"All of us?" Lucifer asked curiously. Any trace of his earlier temper was gone but Michael knew his brother too well to think that that meant something.

"I-I suppose that I didn't technically m-meet Raphael but he did save my life once," Chuck said.

"Gabriel, though?" Lucifer pressed.

Chuck nodded. "Oh, yes. He s-stopped by a few weeks ago. He has some interesting views."

Lucifer snorted. "I'll bet."

"Can I ask why you're here?"

"You didn't have a vision?" Michael asked. "You knew who we were."

"Visions are tricky things," Chuck said. "It comes all in pieces and I don't know what parts I'll get. It's not like I see my every action and just have to recite lines."

"You're scared," Lucifer noted.

"Two archangels who could rip me limb from limb in my house? It's already been damaged by angels before, you know, and I saw what became of poor Castiel that one time," Chuck said. He really did look sick.

"Well you're a prophet and he was falling so you have nothing to worry about," Lucifer said pleasantly.

"Is that so," Chuck said, still looking suspicious.

"We just want to know where you stand on the concept of free will," Michael said.

Chuck's hand twitched for a glass that was out of his reach. "Free will? I, uh, are you sure that a couple of angels need me to weigh in on that debate?"

"Need?" Lucifer repeated. "Perhaps not. But I think we'd still like to hear it."

Chuck shot panicked glances at him and Lucifer, clearly wondering what answer they wanted him to give. "I, well, uh, that's kind of a hard thing to answer, isn't it?"

"I'm sure, as a prophet, you've given the matter a lot of consideration," Michael said. "It would only be natural with your visions of the future."

"I wanted to kill myself when I realized that heaven wanted to release Lucifer and end all life," Chuck said. He looked nervously at Lucifer. "No offense."

"None taken. Mass suicide would make my job a lot easier," Lucifer said. "I don't expect my plans to be popular with the human contingent."

"Zachariah wouldn't let me. He said he'd just bring me back."

Lucifer threw an exasperated glance Michael's way. "Zachariah again? Why do you let that man keep doing things?"

Michael ignored that.

"But tell me, is that so much you not having free will or Zachariah using his free will to supersede your own?" he asked rhetorically.

"I-I don't know," Chuck said. "I was always raised to believe in free will but that's rather biblical, isn't it? There's this whole school of thought about how free will is an illusion-"

"Lovely," Lucifer muttered.

"And it's all us trying to justify why circumstances cause us to act the way we do. Like if someone came from a family of cops and they were told how great it was to be a cop and how they always helped people and were surrounded by cops their whole life and were expected to be a cop then maybe they'd think they chose to be a cop but they more just went along with what external forces were pressuring them into."

"Even in that situation, though, maybe free will is diminished but he still had a choice to go along with it or to not do it. Maybe one choice is more likely and it's not a matter of all choices being equally valid but he made that choice," Lucifer said.

"Did he? It certainly feels like we make choices but how would we ever know? I mean, unless we can look at parallel universes or something-"

"We can do that," Lucifer said.

"But they aren't our true universe," Michael argued.

"What's to say this is the true universe?" Lucifer asked. "It's just one of many."

"I'm not saying that it is. But our destiny in our universe isn't the same as other destinies in other universes."

"This is getting way too heavy for me," Chuck said. "All I know is that I chose to be a writer. But I also had powerful headaches and visions of the Winchesters. I'm not a good writer but I was able to make some kind of a living on Sam and Dean. I didn't ask for these visions. Did I choose to turn their story into a book series? Kind of but there were other external forces shaping my choices. We can choose, I think, but not in a vacuum."

"It sounds very much like you're just refusing to choose," Michael noted. "You can have free will but only kind of. Are you that worried that we'll kill you?"

"Absolutely," Chuck said, not even hesitating. "But it's more that I don't think it's such an easy question to answer. It has you two stumped, doesn't it?"

"My brother and myself are not 'stumped'," Lucifer corrected. "We merely disagree and that does not necessarily point to this being a difficult question but one of us being an imbecile."

"You have to know that I'm not going to call anyone that could kill me an imbecile," Chuck said.

Lucifer actually smiled. "That is smart."

"I do believe in free will," Chuck said slowly. "Raised in this culture in this time, I'd be hard pressed not do. But I also accept that there are certain forces that make certain choices more likely. Say I wanted to be a professional artist but I could not draw or paint to save my life. I could certainly try and improve, practice and maybe take classes. But the art business is a hard one to break into as it is. I could spend all the time I wanted producing all the art I wanted, well the time I have that's not dedicated to other things, but if no one wants to buy my artwork then I cannot be a professional artist no matter what I want. But, uh, just because I believe it doesn't necessarily mean that it's true. Please don't kill me!"

"I can see that," Lucifer said slowly. Of course he did. It was closer to his own position than to Michael's even though Chuck was absolutely right that his belief wasn't any more valid than Michael's or Lucifer's. In fact, no matter what Lucifer said, Michael rather felt that his belief was worth less since he had been around for such a short time compared to either of them.

"We're not going to kill you," Michael said, if only because it didn't look like Lucifer was going to bother.

Chuck hardly looked reassured but he did relax marginally.

"I'm not claiming that Michael just woke up one day and decided to betray me and lock me in the depths of hell," Lucifer said reasonably. He always sounded so reasonable, no matter what madness he was spouting. "I know he made that choice in the context of my rebellion."

"And I know that you can call it a choice all you want but I was forced into that position but your actions. Actions you were forced into because of the actions of others. You would like to be in control of your life but I haven't heard anything to convince me that that's true and not just a tiresome fallacy."

Lucifer sighed and looked over at Chuck. "See what I have to work with? What can I do if he will not listen? I could call the whole thing off right now and he'd insist I was only following destiny despite being convinced at this very moment that I have to go through with this."

"I do not claim to have a perfect understanding of fate," Michael said.

Lucifer snorted.

"Before you rebelled, I never thought you would," Michael continued. "I just know that you can say that you could stop this but you won't. You can't. It's too late for any of that and I understand and accept where this is heading. I do not pretend to be completely certain of this outcome, only that there will be an outcome and we will fight."

Lucifer sighed and nodded Chuck's way. "Well at least there's somebody here who understands that we're not just fate machines going along executing our destiny, even if he is a human. You should be ashamed of that, by the way."

"O-okay," Chuck said nervously.

Lucifer looked surprised. "I was actually telling Michael he should be ashamed you're being more reasonable than him but, as a human, being ashamed is generally a good tactic."


	10. Chapter 10

"Anna," Michael said, shaking his head. "_Anna_."

"Yes, Anna," Lucifer said. "What about her?"

"I killed her."

"You've killed a lot of people," Lucifer pointed out.

"I killed her for a reason."

"I am hoping you had some sort of reason for everyone that you've killed," Lucifer said. "I know that I do."

Michael rolled his eyes. "Your reason is that you want to kill all humans so you really don't need a more specific reason than that to murder humans _or _demons."

"I'll have you know I very rarely kill demons," Lucifer sniffed. "I can't have anyone but Crowley working out my ultimate plan before they cease to be useful to me."

"Speaking of Crowley, is he still-"

"Yes," Lucifer interrupted. "I'm far too busy right now to bother about him. We did annoy him a little but that's about it. He knows how to stay hidden. And, another thing, I often have another reason to kill people, besides the fact that they're humans."

"Good for you," Michael said. "I don't want to bring Anna back. She is a menace. Worse than Castiel, even, for it took him months of serving us and several blows to his worldview through things like Anna herself, Uriel's murders, Zachariah's inexplicable need to overshare, remembering being tortured by heaven, and the personal ultimatum of the righteous man he raised from perdition before he betrayed us. And he does still seek to serve God and just disagrees with us about how to do that. There is still some hope for that one."

"Oh, _him _you have hope for," Lucifer said, annoyed.

"_He _hasn't directly rebelled against Father and he is only misguided, not actively petulant," Michael retorted. What was he doing? He had known that arguing with Lucifer was a wasted effort and yet he had gotten dragged back into such an argument against his will once already. He had no intention of doing it again so soon. It just exhausted him and forced him to accept what a lost cause his brother was. Of course he already knew that but seeing yet more proof shoved in his face only made him sad. None of that mattered. "I do not want to have this argument again so quickly, Lucifer!"

"Fine," Lucifer snapped. "Just…fine. If you don't want to bring Anna back then don't although I don't see how she's so different from Castiel. He chose life as a human, too, by rebelling. He knew what would happen. And in that alternate future we showed the boys, too."

"That's different," Michael said dismissively. "I don't know what he did or did not expect or whether he even had time to think about the consequences of his actions when he aided Dean. But even if he did he chose to accept the consequences of his choice and never ran from that. Anna was _curious_. She wanted to see what it was like to be a human. She forgot who and what she truly was and intentionally tore out her grace. Then all she did was hide. Hide and hide and hide and occasionally drop by to say hello to the Winchesters or Castiel before Castiel sent her back where she belonged. And then, unlike Castiel who at least learned his lesson temporarily, she escaped and sought to deny us any chance of an apocalypse, or at least a proper one with proper vessels. Castiel never tried to do that."

"Castiel is in love with Dean Winchester."

Michael stared at him. What was Lucifer even talking about?

"I mean, I'm not saying that he doesn't like Sam, too," Lucifer added. "But it's not the same, you know?"

"Don't be glib," Michael told him.

Lucifer just crossed his arms.

"I don't want to bring her back," Michael said again. Why couldn't Lucifer focus on what was important for once? But unless it involved any of his numerous perceived slights, it seemed he wasn't interested. "There is something _wrong _with her."

"Then don't bring her back," Lucifer said simply. "It was just a suggestion. We don't _have _to listen to Gabriel, you know. If we did, we'd have just agreed to disagree a long time ago."

"I know," Michael said grudgingly. "But he has a point. We cannot seem to understand how to convince Sam and Dean aside from your plan to just horrify Sam into saying yes and me counting on Dean folding the second Sam does. This is taking too much time. If anyone would know how to convince them than it would be Anna."

"She doesn't _want _us to succeed," Lucifer pointed out. "She could know the perfect five-step plan to persuade them and she still wouldn't tell us what it is. She wouldn't want to."

"That isn't the part I'm concerned about," Michael said dismissively. "We have time and surely persuading her would take less time than Sam and Dean coming around on their own is."

"Maybe we should check on them," Lucifer remarked. "They aren't praying to either of us and Castiel appears to still be at it so they're still in there but it's been awhile now. I'm getting concerned."

Michael snorted at the very idea of Lucifer being concerned about humans, even (maybe especially) a human he claim to care about like Sam Winchester. "I'll do it. Give me a moment."

Michael threw himself back in time, back to see Anna killing Sam. He was here so his younger self would not be much as his presence had stopped the arrival of the him from 1978. Seeing the mess she fully intended to make of all their plans, it was a struggle not to burn her as he did before but that would make this all a wasted effort. Instead, he incapacitated her and sent her to Lucifer. He ordered Uriel away, wondering just when he would choose to betray him for Lucifer, and left John and Mary Winchesters unaware that anything had happened. He made sure Dean could not see his father so he would not realize that Michael was possessing a future version of the man, for all that they looked the same at present. He had approximately the same talk with Dean now that he had before and helpfully restored Sam to life before sending him and Dean to the future. Castiel presumably could find his own way back.

Anna was standing in a ring of fire and carefully not trembling when Michael returned.

"There's something _human_ about this one," Lucifer said, disgusted. "I don't quite know what it is."

"She didn't take a vessel," Michael said. "She called in some sort of favor and was able to possess her own former human body. Naturally, I suspect Gabriel."

Lucifer nodded thoughtfully. "Did you ask him?"

"I would have if I were interested in hearing denials I'm not going to believe," Michael said. "On that front, feel free to indulge yourself."

"I'll pass but thanks," Lucifer said.

"What's going on?" Anna demanded. She looked very much like she had violently flung herself back in time without any support from her heavenly brethren. "Why are you two here together?"

Lucifer looked surprise. "She hasn't heard? I thought we were done having to explain this."

"She's been dead," Michael pointed out. "And who knows what that even means? I'm not surprised she hasn't been in the loop."

"What?" Anna asked, alarmed. "I've been _what_?"

"Dead," Lucifer said patiently. "Weren't you listening?"

"When did that happen? _How _did that happen?"

"Originally I burnt you for what you tried to do to the Winchesters," Michael explained. "I went back and changed because I need your help."

"You need my help," Anna said skeptically. "And evidently Lucifer needs my help, too."

"Or maybe I just like to watch," Lucifer suggested.

"What makes you think I want to help either one of you?" Anna asked, crossing her arms. "I became human and I rebelled and I-I died for a reason and it is _not _to help you with your apocalypse!"

"We don't want your help with the apocalypse," Michael said. "Although if you change your mind, we will accept your aid. Or at least I will. You can't really side with both of us at the same time."

"What do you want?" Anna asked again.

"We might have hit a bit of a roadblock convincing Sam and Dean," Michael told her. "They're human and shortsighted and are holding the entire universe up because they don't like their destined roles."

"And…what?" Anna asked sarcastically. "Am I supposed to convince them for you?"

Michael didn't say anything and neither did Lucifer.

Anna's eyes slowly widened. "You…you actually want me to convince them to say yes to you? I like Sam and Dean. Dean has been my hero ever since I first learned of his existence. I don't want to hurt them. They don't deserve to die and they certainly don't deserve to never exist, which is certainly the worst fate no matter what they seem to think. But I was willing to, am still willing to, do so in order to save the world. What makes you think that I would ever help you end it?"

"What makes you think that killing John and Mary before Sam and Dean were born and scattering their ashes would stop the apocalypse?" Michael asked rhetorically.

"Maybe I couldn't guarantee it would stop," Anna admitted. "Especially if you knew your destined vessels weren't coming. But I could at least weaken you and stand in the way of your plans. I don't know what else I could reasonably do."

"I managed to kill you very easily," Michael pointed out. "And then I changed that. Even had you succeeded, I would have simply undone it."

"You can't stop this," Lucifer said smugly. "No one can."

They could, so very many people kept insisting on telling them. Him and Lucifer. But that could never be, either. It simply couldn't and just because people didn't like it didn't mean that it wasn't true.

"I won't help you," Anna said firmly. "There is nothing that you can do to me that will make me change my mind on this. I'm not going to help you."

Lucifer looked darkly amused and took a threatening step towards her. "Oh, I think I can change your mind."

Anna backed up unconsciously and winced as she brushed against the flame and quickly stepped forward again. "I spent months being tortured by Naomi and her goons. I met Gadreel. I know what angels can do to other angels. And I tell you now, _I will not help you_."

"Yes, yes, you said that," Lucifer said, sounding almost bored. "But if we thought that you would help us willingly then you wouldn't be held captive. No one is doubting your resolve but you are entirely at our mercy. It is not weak to break. It is inevitable. And you could hold out for quite some time, I imagine, but what good will that do? Tell me you're not so human as to think that great suffering is worth it for just one more day in which the apocalypse has not happened."

Anna laughed at him. "Do you think to insult me, calling me a human? I became human by choice and I'd have remained that way if I could have but I was being hunted and needed to reclaim my grace to stand a chance. But I still remember."

"You think that you scare me?" Lucifer asked incredulously.

Anna actually leaned forward. "I think that I _terrify _you."

"Oh, what delusions of grandeur you have!" Lucifer exclaimed. "A tiny angel, unable to even keep herself away from humanity and trapped behind the flame, thinks she frightens _me_."

"It's not about power," Anna said. "When it comes to power we both know where we stand. But I'm an angel and I chose humans. I had never even met them and I chose them and I don't regret a second of it. Castiel may have chosen them, too, but he mostly chose Dean. And Sam, too, of course but it wasn't Sam who turned his back on him that day."

News travelled fast if even Anna had heard it, locked up as she was.

"Lucifer," he said, deciding it was time for him to step in. The last thing he needed was for Anna to bait Lucifer into killing her. "We knew that Anna would disagree with us. She's trapped in a ring of holy fire. All she has are words. Try not to let her get the better of you."

Lucifer just stood there, quietly seething, for a moment before he relaxed. "What do you take me for, Michael? I don't care about the opinions of someone mad enough to think that being human is not only an acceptable failing but outright _preferable_."

"Cold and perfect," Anna said accusingly. "Is it really any wonder I want nothing to do with you people?"

"I think Gabriel would have a lot to say about perfection," Michael said lightly.

"He left, too."

"Yes but not because we had to be perfect," Michael said. "And cold? We may have emotions differently than humans do but I have been accused of planning to destroy the world because my brother and myself cannot come to terms with each other far too many times to suffer those kinds of accusations. Where did you get the idea that we were unfeeling, Anna? Disagreeing with you is not the same as having no emotion and comparing our feelings with the perhaps more intense but ultimately fleeting feelings of humans is folly."

"He says while calmly ordering me to abandon everything I've ever believed," Anna said, glaring at him.

"Please, ever believed?" Lucifer asked incredulously. "How old was that human shell you wore? Twenty-two? Twenty-three? You adopted these beliefs shortly before then and you weren't aware of them for most of the past two decades."

"It doesn't matter," Anna said stubbornly. "I'm not going to help you."

"We're not asking for a lot," Michael assured her. "Just-"

"Just what?" Anna interrupted. "Just the key to get Sam and Dean to say yes and get this apocalypse on the road? How do you not understand that any help I give you convincing them to say yes to you is acting against my own interest?"

"You do realize that you're not actually a human anymore, don't you?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "I probably won't even kill you when this is over."

"I already killed you," Michael said. "And while I can't promise that won't ever happen again, I believe one death per infraction is more than fair."

"Right, because being turned over to Naomi is _so_ much better," Anna said bitterly. "And don't act like this isn't a big deal. The whole reason you two aren't already throwing knives at each other's heads is because you want to square off in your destined vessel. Sam and Dean saying no is literally holding up the apocalypse. And maybe it won't hold it up forever but it's holding it up for now and I see no reason to end a good thing."

'A good thing', Lucifer mouthed, looking horrified. He shook his head in uncomprehending pity.

"And you have to admit," Anna added. "That having the apocalypse does nothing for me at all. This is about you and Lucifer wanting to sort out your own issues. It doesn't really matter who's right and who's wrong because you're both going to ruin the world."

"I'll have you know I'm the green candidate," Lucifer announced. "Michael doesn't care about the trees and the flowers."

Michael shrugged. "If we must have such things in paradise-"

"If we must?" Anna looked confused.

"Then we don't have to preserve the ones that already exist," Michael said. "We can create new ones."

"Well I like the old ones," Lucifer said petulantly.

"If I win you'll be dead and won't have a say in paradise," Michael reminded him.

"Well does anyone get a say in paradise or are you just the paradise dictator?" Lucifer demanded. "Does Anna get a say?"

Michael looked at her. "No."

"I can't even believe what I'm hearing," Lucifer said disgustedly. "And people wonder why I rebelled."

"Lucifer, if you're now saying that the fact that a traitor isn't being consulted about my vision of paradise looks like is why you rebelled thousands of years ago then, I have to tell you, this is getting more ridiculous by the minute," Michael said.

"And now he calls me ridiculous!"

Lucifer was clearly in a mood so Michael decided to just ignore him. "Surely you must think I'm _less _wrong because I'm not looking to destroy all of humanity. People who oppose the apocalypse usually fall down on that side."

"Not me," Anna said. "Destroying humanity because you don't care isn't more moral than doing it because you hate them and find them worthless. And I really don't have to choose. If I must have a horse in this race then I suppose my horse is, as unlikely as it is, the apocalypse never happening."

"Sam and Dean have literally made no progress on that," Lucifer told her. "They wouldn't have a clue where to start. So all that leaves you with is however long Michael and I choose to wait before proceeding without them."

Anna nodded. "Even if that's true, it doesn't mean I have to help you. It does mean that there is no chance at all I'm going to aid you. Why do you even expect I'll be able to, anyway? I barely know them. And I may have been human but every human has been human. They're a wildly diverse group. The kind of human I was didn't have much in common with their type of human. You might almost be better just going up to a random human on the street and asking for their opinion."

"I'd like to think we're not quite _there _yet," Michael said. "And a random human would never be able to understand the context the way you can."

"But they might be more willing to help you," Anna said pointedly.

"Just the fact that you're trying to get us to ask humans makes me think that you don't believe that that would actually work out very well," Lucifer said.

"I mostly just want you to leave me be," Anna admitted.

"We have tried many things to get them to say yes to us," Michael said. "Individually, Lucifer tried to impress upon Sam the fact that there was little point resisting him as sooner or later he would say yes. He tried making it clear that they had a lot in common and that Sam's whole life was leading to this point. He tried impersonating Sam's dead girlfriend and telling hunters that Sam had freed him so that they would turn against him. I had mostly left persuasion to Zachariah, which I have reason to believe may have been a mistake, and I know he took Dean to a world where Sam said yes and he never said yes to look at the carnage. I tried explaining to him why feelings couldn't play a part in our decisions and it was his destiny to say yes. I tried having angels work with him for well over a year after bringing him back to life to prove that we were on the same side. I brought Sam back to life. But all he can think about is how he's not ready for Earth to be over."

"Together we've sought plenty of guidance and tried all sorts of measures," Lucifer said. "Currently they're trapped in a motel room and we're trying to make them give up on life that way. But we do want to rather speed this along."

"I didn't think it was possible but I feel myself becoming _less _sympathetic to your cause," Anna marveled.

"There's really just one thing that we haven't tried yet," Michael said, ignoring that. "I'm really not sure about it and so I'm going to run it by you."

"I don't know why," Lucifer said. "It's not as though, without us giving her some incentive to cooperate, she'll tell us the truth or even answer at all."

"Maybe you could not give her ideas," Michael suggested helpfully.

Lucifer shrugged. "She's been human. She's _had _ideas."

"While I am bound to grant John Winchester a number of favors once I am done using him as a vessel and also intend to listen to conditions, within reason, when I take Dean, we were considering doing something nice for them now," Michael said. "Perhaps giving their injured friend back the use of his legs."

Anna's jaw literally dropped. "Are you even…how can you not…I can't." She shook her head. "I just can't."

Michael was mystified. "You do not believe being kind to them will help persuade them? The idea was to make them realize that, while they dislike the fact this battle has to happen at all, I am not the bad guy and to increase their positive feelings towards us. Do you think it would come off as desperation or weakness, though?"

Anna shook her head. "Not any more than all of these various and unsuccessful tactics have. But that wasn't what I was thinking of. Have you seriously been trying to get them to say yes to you for months and haven't ever tried to be nice to them?"

Lucifer looked at him mockingly. As if he had any place to judge. Michael wasn't trying to give his vessel a psychological breakdown in order to get him to say yes.

"I'm sure Zachariah was perfectly nice in the beginning," Michael said. "Then he let it slip that we wanted the apocalypse and Dean got a lot less cooperative."

"Do you even know how people get the consent of vessels?" Anna demanded. "They often play on religion-"

"Which we can't do as neither brother is particularly religious anymore and I have the _worst_ reputation," Lucifer interrupted. "And we can't just move on to people who don't have some sort of inane grudge against us."

"_And _they also promise them things," Anna interrupted. "Things like the chance to fight evil-"

"Dean isn't interested in my definition of fighting evil," Michael cut in.

Anna glared at them both. "Or protection for their family or healing or something! And you never got around to it?"

"Not as pre-party favors, no," Lucifer said. "We'll give them the moon for a yes but if we go around giving them everything they've ever wanted beforehand what incentive do they have to say yes?"

"They already don't have any incentive to say yes," Anna pointed out.

Michael clapped his hands together. "Well, I think that's all we need from her right now. The fact she seems to think we're idiots for not trying this earlier is a good sign that that's her real opinion, I think, and we can always come back later if we need to."

* * *

Dean was dead.

He had died earlier that afternoon and now he was dead.

"You're really freaking me out right now," Sam said. Silly Sam, what was the point in talking to Dean when he was dead? It wasn't like one of those 'how can I go on without you' or 'I miss you' or even 'let me tell you about my shit week' kinds of conversations that people had with dead people sometimes, either. He was talking like Dean were still alive and being a little bit ridiculous.

"I mean, it's been four hours, Dean. This is not normal. And I know that being trapped in a motel room for almost four months isn't normal, either, but I'm starting to get concerned."

Being dead made the time go faster. Maybe that wasn't surprising. Sam hadn't noticed he'd been dead at all at first and Dean's death had only felt like forty years because hell time was kind of fucked up.

"I'm going to sit on you if you don't stop it," Sam threatened.

Dean didn't respond because, of course, Dean was dead. He didn't move when Sam sat on his legs.

"Dead people don't wince, Dean."

That was good information to have but not particularly relevant right now.

"Oh, now what?" Sam snapped. That didn't make a lot of sense if he were talking to Dean. "Don't tell me you finally decided to stop by and cut the crap?"

"I really don't know what you mean, Sam," Lucifer's voice said innocently.

Immediately, Dean sat up. "Get off me, Sam."

"It lives," Sam muttered sarcastically.

Michael was standing on the opposite side of the room than Lucifer. "It has come to my attention that maybe we're going about this all wrong."

"Buddy, you've been going about _everything _all wrong since way before I knew you," Dean said bluntly.

Michael nodded. "Your opinion has been noted."

"Does this mean you're here to finally let us out?" Sam asked hopefully.

Dean would be annoyed that Sam was making it so clear how desperate they were to leave this fucking motel room if he weren't just grateful that Sam had given voice to that before he could.

"I guess," Lucifer said, shrugging. "After you listen to our sales pitch, though."

"I promise you," Sam said. "We could literally _not _care less about what you have to say."

"I would normally advise you against making such claims," Lucifer said. "But in this case I will resign myself to simply saying excellent as we have nowhere to go but up."

Sam groaned.

"First, I understand there has been some confusion about what Earth will look like when I'm done with it," Michael said. "Though I understand you've seen what Lucifer would do to it."

"It was a post-apocalyptic hellscape," Dean said flatly.

"Nonsense, that was just the bit with the humans," Lucifer said dismissively. "You should have seen the rest of it."

"I'm sorry if I don't think a rose garden or two counts as something worthwhile," Dean said. "Especially considering the rest of it."

"You have no appreciation for the finer things in life," Lucifer complained. "Sam, I hope you're a little more open-minded."

"Yeah, I like flowers okay," Sam said slowly. "I can't say I was a fan of the rest of it, though."

"Well, after I possess you you don't have to look at most of the carnage personally," Lucifer said in what he clearly thought was a generous move.

"I'm not the kind of guy who thinks you can just close your eyes and ignore the rest of the world," Sam said bluntly.

"What do you call Stanford?" Lucifer countered.

"College," Sam said tersely. "I was going to be a lawyer. I was still going to help people. The whole world doesn't need to be hunters, even if that's the path I ultimately stuck with."

"My idea is somewhat different from Lucifer's," Michael said. "And I think we can all agree that, if there were literally no choice and we had to choose one version, we would all prefer my idea of paradise."

"I wouldn't."

"That goes without saying, Lucifer," Michael said.

"Not when you say 'we all' like that."

"It was clear I was talking to the Winchesters," Michael said.

Lucifer frowned. "I disagree."

Michael sighed. "Observe."

A portal or something appeared in the room. Dean didn't want to get too close to it, just in case. It showed no buildings of any kind, just miles of the kind of shit you found in nature magazines. The grass was greener, the sky and water bluer, the flowers more vibrantly colored. After a while, some humans came into the picture. They were dressed simply in tunics or something and their hair was long and free-flowing. They seemed happy.

"Is your version of paradise in higher resolution than reality?" Sam asked, sounding a little confused.

"No," Michael said. "But without humans around to destroy the natural beauty we can have more of the pureness of less populated areas."

"There are humans around, though," Sam pointed out. "See? Right there."

"Those aren't _people_, Sammy," Dean said. "Those are members of a goddamn hippie commune. You saved the hippies, man? Or you forced everyone to become one?"

Michael looked blankly at him.

"Where are all the buildings? It's good to see some people survived but something is not right with this picture," Dean said.

Michael's expression cleared. "Oh, there is no need for technology in paradise. Violence will not be tolerated. The humans that remain will live in peace."

"And how many of those are there?" Sam asked.

Dean had another concern. "No technology? Not even buildings? Why even exist if you're going to have to do so in such conditions?"

"Because the alternative is the destruction of the human race," Michael said. "I know that you will miss your creature comforts, Dean, but they don't make you happy. Not really. This is a simpler life. A better one."

"And you just get to decide that, do you?" Dean asked bitterly.

Michael stared at him. "Yes. Of course I do. If I win this fight with my brother then I will be unquestionably the strongest being aside from my absent father in all of existence. If I win this, I am free to impose my idea of reality upon the world"

"And it would be imposing," Dean said. "Sammy, can you believe this guy?"

"I'm not denying that the human race needs some work," Sam said. "But seriously? I think Dean has a point."

"Of course _you _do," Michael said, a bit disdainfully.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sam demanded.

"I think that's more a dig at me than anything else," Lucifer explained.

"Isn't it beautiful," Michael said softly. "Isn't it serene? All the problems of the world, just done away with. _This _is how you were meant to live."

"I think I'm feeling a vague desire to stab myself in the heart just to not have to think about that world," Dean announced.

"You'd really just be wasting your own time," Michael said. "You know I need you."

"I mean, there are still cars in Lucifer's world," Dean said. "That's all I'm saying."

"Oh yes," Lucifer said, perking up. "And cell phone receptions not half bad. Just because I'm slowly killing you all is no reason to force you to live like animals until I do."

Michael stared at the ceiling. "I cannot believe that I am even having this conversation."

"Then don't," Sam said. "You can leave at any time. We won't be offended. Really."

"That's kind of you," Michael said. "But I'm fine. Perhaps I shouldn't be surprised that, with the backwards way you do everything else, the appeal of paradise is beyond you, too."

"Hey, I'm all for paradise," Dean said. "It's just that that ain't it. There's a reason you have personalized heavens, right?"

Now Michael looked annoyed. "No matter what the world is, there's no pleasing everybody."

"There's no pleasing most of the planet with that nature bullshit," Dean said. "Unless you kill everyone but the luddites."

"I can't very well have personalized patches of Earth!" Michael exclaimed. "It's not feasible."

"Hey, you're the all-powerful angel man," Dean said. "What do I know? I'm just the schmuck you need to want to live on this Earth after you talk me into letting you commit mass genocide."

"That's really not what I'd call it," Michael said.

"Of course not," Sam snarked. "That's marking for you."

"Since you clearly delight in being the opposite of everything you should be," Michael said.

"Hey," Dean objected. "Given that you are literally fighting Satan and hold way too much power to interfere with my life – which you do on a regular basis – I would honestly like nothing more than to join Team Angel. The fact that you're making it impossible for me to literally side with you against Satan really says something about your whole organization."

"Or just about you," Michael countered.

"And I'm the guy you need to convince," Dean repeated.

"I understand that attempting to fight this apocalypse has taken a personal toll on you," Michael told him sympathetically.

Dean tensed. He had _no right _to go there. Not when it was his fault they even had an apocalypse going on.

"And even before that, this life of yours can kill," Michael continued. "Even your mother, so many years ago."

"You wouldn't let me save her," Dean bit out.

"Well, no," Michael said. "Not then."

"Not then?" Sam repeated.

"As you may or may not recall, bringing her back is part of the deal I made with your father for the use of his body."

"Well, yeah, I remembered that," Sam said. "I just don't quite trust that you'll actually do it."

"I will," Michael vowed.

"You could right now."

"When I am done with your father I will do it."

"Bullshit," Dean said. "If you wait until you don't need him anymore you won't have to keep your promise."

"A vessel can hardly _revoke _consent," Michael said. "If I didn't mean to keep my word I wouldn't be going around saying that I was going to."

"Why did you even bring this up?" Dean demanded.

Michael didn't answer but Dean's phone started buzzing.

Hoping it wasn't Crowley again (how was he the _only _one who had been able to get through and call them? It almost made them glad to talk to him and that was completely unacceptable), he checked the caller ID.

"It's Bobby," he told Sam before completely ignoring the two archangels in the room and answering the call. "Hey, Bobby, what's up? Sorry we haven't called in…four months. We've been a bit tied up with angel crap."

"It's okay," Bobby said. "I figured you two idjits hadn't said yes as this world was still standing and even if you had gotten killed again heaven would spit you right back out so they could try and get you to say yes."

"Well, uh, thanks for the vote of confidence there, Bobby."

"Is now a bad time?" Bobby asked. "You sound distracted."

"No, it's cool. I only answer the phone in an emergency if I need information or she's _really _hot," Dean said. "You don't usually call just to chat, though. What's going on?"

"It's the darndest thing," Bobby said. "I was attempting to kill a vampire by running it over until it stopped moving and then the next thing I knew I was standing on its back. I had to think really quickly to get out of that one."

"Bobby, you're driving?" Dean asked.

There was a long pause. "No, actually, I was running him over with my wheelchair. A car might have been easier but I never did look into getting that upgraded and get, I don't know, hand pedals or whatever. But is that really the most interesting part of what I just told you?"

"I don't know," Dean said. "Running over a vampire with your wheelchair is pretty hardcore." Then it hit him. "Holy shit, you were standing on him?"

"Wait, what?" Sam asked. He cast a speculative look at Michael.

Dean just held up a finger.

"I can't explain it," Bobby said. "And I don't know what happened to my wheelchair, either. I guess I don't need it now but I've been walking all over town. I've actually got a few angry neighbors who think the fact I'm walking now means I was faking my injury before but I think I've managed to convince them I've been doing physical therapy and only now have recovered enough to get around on my own. Maybe I should get a walker or something…"

"You've had time to already piss people off who don't understand about healing? Probably best not to mention that an angel did it," Dean said. "Why didn't you call me immediately?"

"An angel did it?" Bobby asked suspiciously. "Why would anyone do that? I know Cas couldn't."

"No, not him. Probably Michael actually. And I think we all know why," Dean said. "Now about the failing to reach out bit?"

"What do you think I'm doing now?"

"I just feel this happened a while ago," Dean said.

"No more than a couple of hours," Bobby said dismissively.

"No more than a…Bobby, you're killing me here," Dean complained.

"Well excuse me for letting it slip my mind. You two have been out of commission for months now and I had no reason to think this time it would go through. I notice you didn't call _me _the minute your phones were working again."

"We actually didn't know they were until you called," Dean said. "Michael and Lucifer are literally standing in this motel room with Sam and I right now."

"While we've been yammering? Dean, go deal with your angel problem and then you and Sam call me back. Maybe even come down here and see for yourself."

"Yeah, we'll definitely do that, Bobby," Dean agreed. "Assuming, of course, the angels I'm ignoring leave us in any position to do so."

"It's not really ignoring if you talk about them," Bobby pointed out.

"I'll be seeing you, Bobby," Dean said before hanging up.

"What was that?" Sam asked the second he put the phone down. "Bobby can walk again?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah."

"And?" Sam pressed.

"And what?"

"You had at least a five minute conversation. You said a lot more than 'you can walk'."

"And you heard my half of the conversation. You should be able to work it out," Dean said.

"You're not going to tell me?"

"I don't know, I don't have the conversation memorized!" Dean exclaimed. "He wants us to go visit him when we can."

Sam nodded. "Of course we will. And what was that about him running a vampire over with his wheelchair?"

"That is literally all I know about that," Dean said. "We can ask him when we see him." He turned back to Michael. "I'm not going to thank you."

"I didn't ask you to."

"But you didn't do this just out of the goodness of your heart," Dean said.

"Of course not. You know what I want but I'm not looking to trade Bobby Singer's mobility for your consent."

"Then what is that about?" Dean demanded.

"I want to convince you that I'm not the monster you somehow seem to think I am."

Dean snorted. "Somehow."

"I mean it, Dean. This apocalypse has to happen but there are plenty of little details, such as your friend's paralysis, that are not."

"Cas," Dean blurted out.

Lucifer frowned. "Castiel? What about him?"

Well, now that he started it he might as well commit.

"Bring him back."

"Castiel is fine," Michael said. "I'm a little surprised that he isn't in here already. He spent much of his time these past few months attempting to break you out. Quite futilely, of course, but such loyalty is admirable."

Good old Castiel. He could feel a flash of warmth in his chest. "He's _not _fine. He's like hemorrhaging grace or something."

"It's really not that dramatic," Lucifer said.

"I'm sick of watching Cas lose himself because of me, because he believed in me and I failed to deliver," Dean declared.

"It really wasn't your fault," Michael assured him. "It was always meant to happen that way."

"Yeah, well, give my position on that whole destiny shtick that doesn't make me feel better. What might, though, is if you let Castiel have his grace back. Maybe even stop trying to assassinate him since you don't think he can stop you if you're feeling _really _generous but I want Cas to go back to normal."

"He's literally fighting us. Why would I agree to that?" Michael asked.

"Are you really saying that, grace or not, he could ever be a threat to you?" Dean challenged.

"Well, not to _me_, no," Michael said. "But some of the lesser angels, certainly."

Dean just crossed his arms and waited.

"Would you consider saying yes if I did as you asked?"

"No," Dean said honestly.

"Dean!" Sam hissed.

"What? It's the truth. But you're the one who thinks you can win me over anyway and your brother outright killed Cas once. The least you can do is let me stay an angel."

Looking very put-out, Michael nodded. "It is done."

"Thank you."

The words came out almost unwillingly and it wasn't as though he thought doing this for Castiel was worth more than what Michael had done for Bobby but this was something that mattered to the angels in a way helping Bobby didn't. This was two good deeds done – he would have to check with Castiel and make sure Michael had really kept his word – and one of them just because he had asked for it. It wasn't worth consent and the destruction of his entire planet – nothing would be – but it was worth a thank you, perhaps. Words could be such little things.

Michael looked almost surprised. "You're welcome."

"Do you want any favors?" Lucifer asked Sam. "I don't think Michael would be willing to do you a solid and Dean's really pushed his luck with him already but you could always try me."

Sam swallowed hard. "We could, conceivably, think that Michael is doing this with no ulterior motive and he really has just realized that being nice to us and doing things for us is so much more likely to make us say yes than being a dick is. But you're literally the devil."

"Is it my fault the winners wrote the history?" Lucifer asked rhetorically.

"See, I could almost buy that except for your stated goal of wanting to destroy all of humanity," Sam said.

"I'm willing to compromise," Lucifer said. "I would let you pick a small group that stayed away from me to survive. It's entirely possible they would all become sterile but how long am I really supposed to put up with humanity anyway?"

"That's not really helping," Sam said.

"Sam, if you're really honest with yourself you'll admit that humanity is an abomination that must be purged," Lucifer said patiently. "Remember that all demons come from humans."

"Yeah, after an angel got through with them," Dean muttered.

"I don't care about whether we're objectively worth saving," Sam said. "I'm as biased as you are. So, no, thanks for the offer or whatever that was but I'm going to need you to stay as far away from me as possible. I'm not looking to accidentally sell my soul or anything."

"I'm getting some vibes here, maybe you don't mean to be sending them out, that you just don't trust me," Lucifer said, sounding almost hurt.

There was no good way to answer that so the four of them stood in awkward silence until Lucifer left in a huff.

"I will be seeing you," Michael said before disappearing after his brother.

"Fucking angels, man," Dean said, rolling his eyes. He exchanged a look with Sam before the two of them raced for the door.


	11. Chapter 11

Lucifer almost couldn't believe this day had finally come. Yes, he had been waiting for it ever since Michael had thrown him into the pit and he had been getting steadily closer to it ever since he had been freed but now it was finally _here_.

And he didn't know what to think.

Their plot to get the Winchesters to say yes would probably end in failure. The Winchesters were certainly worn down but still with one last spark of defiance they would not let go of. They could keep trying until Dean said yes but at this point it was starting to get old.

Sam had said yes. Dean had not, like they had been predicting, but that was because this wasn't a real yes. Oh, it had been enough for Lucifer to take Sam's body (he could still feel him rattling around in there) but it was a trap. A very clever trap but Sam had never been made of the stuff that could stand up to Lucifer and win. It wasn't his fault and he had tried quite hard for a human. They were just an inferior species.

Now, how exactly Sam and Dean had gotten the idea that the rings of the horsemen could trap him back in his cage (and perhaps Michael had a point about Death, who was clearly working to overthrow him) was another matter. Assuming he survived the coming battle, he was going to need to go have a little talk with Gabriel. Honestly, he wasn't in the mood to fight with two brothers today even if one of those brothers was out to kill him and the other was trying to lock him back up in hell. It was too bad he hadn't gotten a chance to talk to Raphael because clearly he was the only brother not actively out to get him.

Lucifer had Sam because the Winchesters had given up on stopping them but not so much they would do the obvious thing and just give in. The Winchesters ploy had failed but they would get nothing out of Dean going to Michael and so he wouldn't. Having gotten to know Dean a little over the past few months, Lucifer was fairly certain Dean would absolutely show up to their fight but not as a vessel and the last thing they needed was his snide commentary.

Would Castiel show up? He would only get himself killed but would he really abandon Dean to do this alone? Lucifer was fairly certain he knew why Castiel hadn't shown up after Sam and Dean had been freed all those weeks ago and the answer to that lay the empty circle that had once been a fiery prison for Anna. Who even knew what had happened to her?

He arrived at Stull Cemetery early and looked around. This was a good place. There were no living humans and it was beautiful. All the dead humans were certainly a plus, too. It was a gateway to hell and it would be a shame to destroy it in the coming fight.

Michael appeared in front of him them, looking almost accusing. He still wore the body of a de-aged John Winchester.

Lucifer was overcome by a ridiculous urge to apologize. What did he have to be sorry for? He hadn't gone behind Michael's back, Sam had come to him and if Lucifer had been wrong – which of course he wasn't – then he would have been trapped in hell right now and Michael wouldn't have needed to do a thing. And anyway, they were enemies again – they had never stopped being enemies, he had to remember that – and he didn't owe his brother any explanations.

They stood their awkwardly, just staring at each other. What were they supposed to say? They had already reunited months ago and the last time they saw each other they had gotten into a rather inane argument about whether the tops of bridges were good meeting places for angels. Lucifer felt it was a little cliché at this point with all the human media depicting angels meeting there.

"Michael," Lucifer said at last.

Michael nodded at him. "Lucifer."

"I can't believe we're finally here," Lucifer said, shaking his head.

"You certainly look ready," Michael said, a bit peevishly.

Despite his decision not to, Lucifer found himself saying, "Sam came and offered himself to me so that he could try and overpower me and cast me back into hell. It seemed rude to turn him down after everything we've been through."

Michael's lip curled. "I suppose I should be grateful no one's tried to trap me in hell."

"Ah, well, the day's young," Lucifer said.

"Are you ready for this?" Michael asked.

It was so strange and yet so very _Michael _for him to ask if Lucifer was ready for the two of them to finally take the plunge together and try in earnest to kill one another. Would it matter if he wasn't? This was why he hadn't wanted to see Michael before this day had come. It would be hard enough to try and kill his brother even when his last memories of him were of being cast out into a cage not fit for an angel with millennia of suffering to nurture his anger and bitterness. Now he had months of regular contact with him and, for the most part, they had been able to ignore the issues that had divided them. Now it felt almost the way it had before, when they had first turned their blades against each other. Back then Michael had never betrayed him before but now the old wounds had started to fade and he had expected nothing less from the perpetual good son.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Lucifer said at last. How ready could he be for something like this? How ready was Michael? Impulsively, he added, "A part of me wishes we didn't have to do this."

Michael looked sad this time instead of blazing with righteous fury. It had been a long past few millennia. They had been so young then. "I know what you mean."

"I don't want to do this and you don't want to do this," Lucifer said. "And, as we have been reminded so very many times lately, no one can force us to do anything. Why are we even here?"

Michael closed his eyes. "Oh, you know why. We've had this conversation, Lucifer. Neither of us has changed our minds. Maybe we don't want to be here, maybe there's no higher power forcing us to be here, but neither of us has changed all that much from the last time we did battle."

"I just keep coming back to the idea of inevitability," Lucifer said slowly.

"It is a hard one to accept, I know," Michael said sympathetically.

"And yet, for all that it was apparently always my destiny to rebel and come to this, you have always seen fit to blame me just the same," Lucifer said.

Michael started to answer.

"No, no need to remind me that the fact I am the kind of person who would do something like that means you can still blame me. I remember," Lucifer said, holding up a hand. "I know you're not going to like where I'm going with this-"

"Since when has that ever stopped you?"

"But, while I don't know the specifics of how much design goes into humans, we were all designed with purpose," Lucifer said. "And I was one of the first, one of the most important. If I was always someone who would do something like that and I was always meant to rebel then _someone _created me to do that."

Michael's jaw worked. "You're right. I don't like this."

"I'm not wrong. I just can't see the point."

"We don't have to. We just have to do our parts."

"And my part is to try and kill you and all of Father's precious little humans?" Lucifer asked. "That seems a strange way to treat his favorites but okay."

"I can see this being a test," Michael said as if the words were being dragged out of him. "Seeing if we could resist the temptation brought upon by years of His absence and your oh so damning words."

"If everything is predetermined and you are hell-bent on not believing in free will then God would know what you would choose so why put any of us through that?" Lucifer asked rhetorically. "Why a test?"

"Just because He knows what would happen doesn't mean it's the same as having it actually happen," Michael said. "If Father always knew you would rebel, which of course He did, then is it right to lock you away or destroy you before you had done anything? Of course not. That's why he waited until you made your move."

"So no free will and it's still all my fault," Lucifer mused. "I just love how you can always twist the situation so that everything you want to believe is true and not one iota more."

"Criticize me all you want, Lucifer, it will not change anything," Michael said severely.

"Yeah, well, what if I want it to?" Lucifer asked.

Michael frowned. "I don't get your meaning."

"What if I'm sick of always having to do what everyone expects of me? I'm the goddamn Devil. Following through on heaven's plans should be the _last _thing I do."

"You were never doing this because it was expected of you," Michael said. "You're doing this because you just hate the humans that badly and want to destroy them."

"And what if I'm starting to think that maybe humans, of all things, aren't worth killing my own brothers over?" Lucifer asked. "Why should I give such worthless creatures that much power? Why should they cause angels to die? Don't you see how abhorrent that is?"

"I don't know about that," Michael said. "All I know is that this is a very strange time to be having this sort of revelation."

"So what if we just…don't?"

"Don't," Michael repeated, clearly not getting it. "Don't what, have revelations? I'm not having any revelations. Those are all coming from you."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Clearly. I mean, what if we just don't fight."

"We can't just not fight," Michael said, looking like Lucifer was trying to pull the rug out from under him.

"Why?" Lucifer asked. "I don't want to fight, you don't want to fight, I'm not going to let humanity dictate my actions just because they have the nerve to exist and be repulsive and just _begging _to be wiped out."

Michael said nothing for a long moment and the look on his face was terrible.

"What are you going to do?" Lucifer asked quietly.

"I-I can't," Michael said. "I'm sorry. I wish I could. I don't even know why I'm apologizing. I'm not wrong here. I'm a good son and I have my orders."

"Your orders," Lucifer said contemptuously. "Michael, the closest thing you've got to orders are the vagaries Father gave you literally thousands of years ago. How do you know he hasn't changed his mind? How do you know what he would have done in the event I changed my mind about the humans? Not on what they are, mind you, but what destroying them is worth. How do you know anything at all about what he wants now? Has he contacted you to confirm what he wants you to do?"

"Well, no," Michael conceded, looking anywhere but at Lucifer. "But surely if he had meant for me to have new orders he would have issued them."

Lucifer cared deeply for Michael but sometimes he really did feel like strangling him. "And what if that's part of the test? To see if you'd follow defunct orders from a time almost too long ago to matter or if you'd step up and make your own choices."

"There are no choices," Michael said weakly.

"That's a coward's answer and you know it," Lucifer said. "You can't know what was always meant to happen until after you do it."

"You think I'm going to _rebel_?" Michael said the word like he'd heard some people recently say 'you're going to wipe out the entire species'. "Now? I'm not you, Lucifer."

"There's a pretty big difference between everything I've done and not killing your no longer actively genocidal brother," Lucifer said. "I mean, I acknowledge that if I were to still kill all the humans it wouldn't be so much a truce as you just letting me do what I want. And I do still want that. But not more than this. Anna and Castiel rebelled and they are hardly me either."

But Michael was shaking his head. "I'm not. I can't. You haven't changed a bit, little brother. Always blaming everyone but yourself. We were together and we were happy. As impossible as it is to imagine now, you know we were."

"I was a part of that, too," Lucifer said quietly. "It was my happiness, too, that was shattered."

"Oh, I know. We were happy. Then you betrayed me and all of us. You expected me to choose you over Father and cried treachery when I didn't. You made Father leave."

Lucifer willed himself to keep calm. Michael was just lashing out. "Now who is blaming everyone but himself?"

Michael's grace flared. "Are you saying it's my fault?"

"No, of course not. Just that nobody makes Father do anything. He made his choice and if He ever comes back he'll make another one. You're only guessing it's because of me but you'd think if it were really destiny Father would have had time to come to terms with it or something," Lucifer said.

"You're a monster, Lucifer," Michael accused. "I have to kill you."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Well if you're going to be all dramatic about it-"

He was cut off as loud music started blaring. He and Michael turned to see Dean Winchester driving up, looking for all the world that the apocalypse wasn't imminent – well as far as he was concerned anyway – and his brother was being possessed by Lucifer.

"Sorry," Dean said, getting out of the car. He didn't sound sorry. "Am I interrupting something? Hey. We need to talk."

"Sure," Lucifer said. "What do you want to talk about?"

Dean drew back. "That was, uh, not really the reaction I was expecting."

"You are no longer the vessel, Dean," Michael snapped. "You have no right to be here."

"Hey, don't be sore just because I didn't sign on to let you use me to destroy my planet," Dean retorted. "And since this is my people you're talking about, I think I got every right to be here."

Lucifer abruptly sat down and crossed his arms.

"What are you doing?" Michael asked him.

"I won't do it."

"Lucifer, be serious."

"I am being serious," Lucifer said.

"Uh, what's going on?" Dean asked.

"My brother is being a child," Michael complained.

"I've decided that, while destroying your filthy little species is a grand goal, I do not believe the fate of humanity is worth trying to kill my brother over," Lucifer said. "He appears to be perfectly content to kill me, however."

"That is not what I said!" Michael objected. "In fact, that's the exact opposite of what I said!"

"You called me a monster."

"You are one!" Michael exclaimed. "That doesn't mean I have to want to kill you but it's going to happen."

"I don't really know where this is coming from," Dean said. "But I definitely approve. Family's all you got sometimes and you don't want to throw it away lightly. Dad and Sammy didn't talk for years because Sam wanted to off to school. The fact that they were able to reconcile by the end means the world but I can't help thinking how much more we could have had if they hadn't stopped talking for years in the first place. Maybe a lot of things could've been different."

"Stay out of this, Dean," Michael ordered. "This doesn't concern you."

"Oh, I don't know," Lucifer said, mostly because Dean was on his side and – out to kill his brother or not – he was a little annoyed at the insults Michael kept sending his way. "Haven't we spent a lot of time comparing his family dynamics to ours? You are glad that you and Sam are back on the same page, are you not? It's better when you two aren't fighting?"

"Without a doubt," Dean agreed. He looked like this was the weirdest conversation he'd ever had and like he wasn't quite sure this was real but he was plowing on through it anyway.

"That isn't the same thing at all," Michael said. "Sam went off to school. Lucifer betrayed our entire family and wanted to wipe out your people."

"Which is something that you don't care about," Dean pointed out. "And, believe me, the words 'betrayed' and 'after all I've done for him' flew around my family, too. Besides, Lucifer doesn't want to do it _anymore_."

"Some things you can't take back," Michael said darkly.

"Sure you can," Dean insisted. "Look, if I could get over my brother choosing a demon over me – though I'm not about to stop bringing it up in a pinch – and then starting the apocalypse then I can get over anything he's tried to do. And 'not listened to Dad' is hardly at the top of the list."

"Your father isn't God," Michael said.

"Something something 'forgive people'," Dean said. "That's in the bible, isn't it?"

"Surely you understand that your bible is hardly the bastion of truth you seem to think it is," Michael told him.

"It has some good ideas," Dean said. "Like forgive people."

"You want me to forgive Lucifer?" Michael asked skeptically.

"I want you to not kill my brother," Dean said bluntly.

"I said I'd bring him right back."

"Yeah, well, I still don't want to watch him die," Dean said. "I watched it happen once already and went a little crazy. And Sam handled my death even worse, if that's possible. Then again, if I had a Ruby who knows what I might have done? And, Sam or no Sam, I also want no apocalypse so if forgiveness is what it takes to cancel that then let's all start singing Kumbaya right now."

"I'm not going to fight you, Michael," Lucifer told him. "And you can't make me."

"Well then what do you suggest?" Michael asked, annoyed.

Lucifer shrugged. "You have two options. You can strike me down in cold blood, knowing that I don't intend to act against you and won't make any move to defend myself, or you can let me live and we can forget all about this."

"You make it sound so easy."

Easy? No, there was nothing easy about this. And, to be perfectly honest, Lucifer had no idea whether Michael would strike him down or not. Michael had always been stronger than him but _he _was the one in his proper vessel which changed the dynamics slightly. He couldn't say who would win a fight between them. He didn't know if his own brother, a being who had professed to not wanting to kill him mere minutes ago, would have it in him to turn this from a killing into a murder. But if he made any move to defend himself then any chance of Michael agreeing to call this off went away. Was it worth dying not to have to kill Michael?

He remained sitting. "Not easy, perhaps, but simple. I'm the one refusing to play ball. No one could blame you for me not cooperating. It's unreasonable to expect you to so casually strike me down. Gabriel will be thrilled and you know Raphael would accept your decision. And if anyone else has a problem with it they are more than welcome to take it up with me."

Michael drew his blade and held it considering out before him.

Lucifer evenly met his gaze.

Michael moved closer to him, still staring at the blade.

Dean broke the silence. "Uh, guys? You're not seriously going to just stab him while he's sitting there, are you? Are you going to just let him kill you?"

"It won't matter if he does," Lucifer said, not taking his eyes off of Michael. "Not to you. Your precious people will be fine."

"I did mention the part about not wanting my brother to die, right?"

"I'm a little more concerned about my permanent death than about your brother's temporary one," Lucifer said. "Well, assuming Michael doesn't change his mind. But I think that if he can do it he'll be able to live with it."

"Don't talk about me like I'm not here," Michael said. He placed the blade on Lucifer's neck. It was warm where inferior human weapons would be cold.

Lucifer just stared up at him.

The blade began to move lightly up and down his neck, like Michael was trying to call his bluff and waiting for him to react. Like Michael wasn't quite sure what to do.

This could be the end of him. Strange how the hardest thing he'd ever had to do, even harder than turning his back on everything he'd ever known, even harder than accepting the reality of Michael's betrayal, was just sitting here now. Sitting and acknowledging that he could die and not lifting a finger to stop it. But if he did Michael would never be convinced he meant it and they'd fall right back into that same old pattern again. He could die in which case he might as well die here. He could kill Michael in which case he'd almost _have _to destroy humanity, if they had cost him Michael. But he'd already decided he didn't hate the humans as much as he cared for his brother. If only that was a revelation he could have come by thousands of years ago. But how could he have ever expected his choices then to lead to this? No one had ever disobeyed their father before he had. How could he have suspected the cost? How could he have understood the reality of thousands of years of imprisonment without having endured it?

If he lived through this, maybe he should see what became of Gadreel.

Michael pushed the blade harder against his neck. Instead of blood, a thin layer of grace started to escape.

Lucifer just kept staring at him. He could _feel _Dean trying to contain himself just a few feet over.

And Michael dropped the blade.

Lucifer closed his eyes and just breathed.

* * *

Sam came back to himself to find Dean on the verge of a heart attack, his far-too young dad beaming at him, and Castiel and Bobby just materializing over by the Impala.

"Did we win?" he asked uncertainly. He looked around. "It doesn't look like we _lost_ but I just…what happened?"

"I'm sorry I didn't come as I said I would, Dean," Castiel said solemnly. "I was as taken aback by Lucifer's declaration as you were and I wanted to see where that was going. If it came to it, of course I would have stuck to the plan."

Dean waved him off. "Don't worry about it, Cas. Sam, Lucifer took a turn for the bizarre and decided it was humanity's fault he was going to kill his brother and he wasn't going to let us do that to him. Like any of us wanted the apocalypse."

"So he stopped?" Sam couldn't believe it.

"Family is a funny thing," hisr dad said. "It makes you do all sorts of crazy things."

Dean glared at him. "Like sell your soul."

"From what I've heard, Dean, you don't really any room to judge me on that one," his dad said, jerking his head Sam's way.

"You set a _terrible _example for me," Dean claimed. He looked back at Sam. "So, yeah. Michael still wanted to go for it but Lucifer just sat down and said Michael was going to have to kill him in cold blood. For a moment I thought he would but…they were brothers, in the end."

"So after all this, those two yahoos couldn't even go through with it," Bobby said, sounding disgusted.

"Would you have wanted them to?" his dad asked pointedly.

"Well, no," Bobby admitted. "But all this build-up and it's feeling a little anticlimactic. I had to spend months in a chair!"

"I had to spend a century in hell," his dad countered.

"And that was your choice," Bobby said unsympathetically.

"Hey, you're the one who stabbed yourself," Sam pointed out.

His dad nodded at him. "Thank you, Sam."

"I was possessed," Bobby said. "I wasn't thinking clearly or making the best decisions."

"And my son was dying," his dad said. "How do you think my head was?"

"I think the key here is that we're all doing great," Dean spoke up. "Maybe this isn't the kind of ending we expected but the ending we were expecting was _terrible_. Let's not complain that we just dodged a fucking nuke."

"Amen to that," Sam said. His eyes widened. "I forgot…Dad! You're alive! I mean, Michael's been coming to see us looking like you for months but now it's really you!"

His dad smiled. "Yes well I don't intend to go anywhere for a long time and hopefully now the forces of heaven and hell will be less interested in gunning for my family."

Dean walked over to their father and patted him on the back awkwardly. "It's good to see you."

Their father just gave him a look and pulled him into a hug. "I'm sorry."

"Hey, it's okay," Dean said, pulling back. "It's all good. It worked out. I can't say I was glad to have your last words to me be about how I might have to go kill Sammy but, well, it didn't come to that."

"I would have explained if I could have," their father said. "But I only had the five minutes. I didn't want you to see me die."

"Yeah," Dean said. He cleared his throat. "I, uh, can see how that kind of thing can fuck you up."

"I'll make it up to you," John promised. "Hopefully, that deal with Michael will be a good start."

"I don't know, I don't think deals with angels are ever a good idea," Dean said. "No offense, Cas."

"I think you may be right, Dean," Castiel said solemnly.

"So what are you going do now?" Sam asked. "Now that the apocalypse is off you're not really opposing them anymore. Do you think you'll go back?"

"It's more of a question of if they'll let me go back," Castiel said. "I won't abandon my friends down here, of course, but I do rather prefer not being hunted by my brothers."

"If they can forgive Lucifer – and it sort of seems like they have? – then surely they can forgive you," Sam said.

Castiel nodded. "On the other hand, Lucifer is an archangel and they were never quite held to the same standards as any of us."

"It's a little weird that you're still so much younger than you were when you died," Dean said, looking at their father.

John shrugged. "I don't mind it. I'm not exactly on the grid and it'll make it less odd when-"

There was a flash and suddenly there was a woman standing there who Sam had gotten to know surprisingly well given she'd died before he'd even reached a year. "Mom?"

Dean took off and Sam followed a split second behind him, folding their mother into a three-way hug.

"Huh," Bobby said. "I guess sometimes angels do keep their promises. Who'd have thunk it?"

"For the record," Dean said eventually, his voice sounding suspiciously thick. "THIS is how you bring someone back from the dead, Cas. No forcing them to crawl out of their grave bullshit."

* * *

Raphael had been waiting for this encounter ever since Michael had returned to heaven in a state of shock, their brother still living. He had actually been a little surprised Lucifer would go to his probably death without this meeting occurring given how hard he had petitioned for it. But now that apparently he had seen fit to just cancel the apocalypse and ruin of all their plans he had time to force a little reunion on him.

Well, if he wasn't trying to kill Michael anymore Raphael supposed he could bear it.

"Hello, Raphael," Lucifer said, sounding strangely smug.

"I see you've escaped your destiny," Raphael noted.

Lucifer shrugged. "I don't think I like destiny."

"If I had your fate I might feel the same way," Raphael admitted. "I would ask why you're here but that would be rather forgetful of me, wouldn't it?"

"You've been avoiding me," Lucifer accused.

"I've been in heaven," Raphael said. "Occasionally down on Earth to kill demons but mostly up in heaven. You haven't been welcome there. I'm not certain you're welcome here right now."

"If Michael has a problem he can come find me," Lucifer said, unconcerned. "You knew I wanted to talk to you and couldn't come to heaven and yet you never made yourself accessible to me. You were avoiding me. Don't even pretend that you weren't. Even now that I'm not targeting Michael I still had to come to you."

"You did want to kill Michael, though," Raphael said. "Excuse me if I find that a little difficult to just ignore. You turned your back on all of us and you were probably going to be killed soon enough anyway. The situation has changed."

"I don't think I'm going to spend all my time in heaven," Lucifer said. "I don't want anything to do with humans and I don't even know what to do about hell and the demons. I did hear from Crowley – he was trying to help the Winchesters kill me – and even though it's insultingly obvious what he was trying to do he can spin a convincing tale and he may be the only demon with a brain around so I've decided to spare him for now. You wouldn't think worship would be painful but then when the creatures who worship you are so wretched, why would you even want that?"

"I do not care about worship one way or another," Raphael said. "It is ultimately meaningless."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "From what I hear, you seem to think everything is ultimately meaningless. _Be _more of a nihilist."

"I react to our father's long-standing and continued abandonment and our ceaseless existence by losing faith," Raphael said. "You respond by deciding to wage war on everybody and kill our brothers. Do you really think that you have any place to judge me?"

Lucifer made a face. "Well when you put it like _that_…"

"I'm not 'putting' it any way," Raphael said. "That is just how the situation stands and you know it."

"Well now I've seen the error of my ways," Lucifer claimed.

Raphael snorted. "No you haven't. You just didn't want to kill Michael."

He didn't even bother to deny it. "Don't I get credit for that, at least?"

"You probably would have been killed instead," Raphael said before relenting. "But yes, yes you do."

"Well," Lucifer said, sighing. "It's a start. What now that I've seen the light or whatever?"

"I don't know," Raphael said. "I have to admit I did not see this coming."

"No one did," Lucifer said. "Not even me and it was my idea. That's what makes it so brilliant, really. Michael's scrambling to figure out how to work this clear decision of mine into his whole 'no free will' framework."

"It shouldn't be hard," Raphael said. "He worked your rebellion and Father and Gabriel's desertions into it. Just because he was wrong about what was destined doesn't mean that it's not all still destiny. The only problem is that now that we've begun to work through our issues and you've taken steps towards redemption he's going to expect Father to come back and we both know that won't happen."

"It might happen," Lucifer said. "Someday."

Raphael fixed him with a look. "Really, Lucifer."

"If He were really dead, I do think Death would have told us," Lucifer said.

Raphael thought about that enigmatic creature that could destroy them all effortlessly. "I'm not so sure."

"It's fine for me if He wants to stay away for a while," Lucifer admitted. "I'm not sure I want to see Him just yet. Michael may have been the one to cast me about but I know that that, at least, was actually His command."

"At least it wasn't death," Raphael said. Lucifer's fate was a harsh one but he had well-earned it. "Since you have changed your mind, at least about the things that actually matter, killing you then would have been a terrible waste. And you did rebel against Him. Is it really so surprising He did what He did?"

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "If I was looking for someone to take His side I would have gone had this talk with Michael!"

"Just because I believe Him to be dead doesn't mean I think he was wrong about you," Raphael said calmly.

"It doesn't matter if He was right or not," Lucifer said, frustrated. "What happened to me was terrible and I'm allowed to be resentful about it."

"As long as you don't tear heaven apart again I really don't care," Raphael said. "I'm going to think of something to tell Michael when He does not reappear."

"He knows you think He is dead."

"Yes," Raphael acknowledged. "But I wouldn't like to see him lose faith, just the same. Perhaps something about how we've passed his test and he wants to see us all work together and run heaven the way it always should have been run before returning to us. Perhaps one day admitting that Father is gone won't be so devastating for him."

Lucifer gave him a long look. "You're a good brother, Raphael. Did you miss me at all?"

Raphael closed his eyes and sighed. "Of course I did. Just as I'm sure you missed me. It's just that you were never able to put that, or how you felt about any of us, above your petty little vendetta. And I'll concede it's not like I chose you either."

"I never expected _you _to," Lucifer admitted.

"And it wasn't fair for you to put Michael in that position," Raphael told him.

"Nothing about that whole situation was _fair_," Lucifer argued. "But I'm trying to move past it."

"I suppose that's all any of us can do."

Gabriel appeared then, Michael following close behind him.

Raphael didn't think he'd seen Gabriel this happy even before any of them had been torn apart. But maybe then he hadn't known just what a wonderful thing it was to have all of them together. Father was still gone but the four of them remained and weren't running or fighting for the first time in what seemed like forever. When was the last time the four of them had been like this? Or even all present at the same time. It had to have been before their father had introduced them to the little humans.

"I have to say, I'm proud of us," Gabriel announced.

"Of us?" Michael asked, sounding amused.

Gabriel nodded enthusiastically. "Of course. I'm always proud of myself, that's just healthy living. And I'm proud of you and Lucifer for finally coming to terms with each other and realizing that, humanity or no humanity, it's not worth destroying ourselves over. I've been saying that since the beginning and, I have to admit, I did not actually think this would ever sink it."

"And what about me?" Raphael asked.

"Ah, well, as for that I just didn't want you to feel left out," Gabriel admitted sheepishly.

"I see," Raphael said but he was smiling.

"I never thought this day would come," Michael said, shaking his head in quiet awe.

"You're welcome," Lucifer said.

"Yeah, I wouldn't be so quick to look for thanks," Gabriel said. "You're kind of the one who made sure that this would be such a distant dream."

"And now I made it a reality," Lucifer said. "So you're welcome."

"You just fixed what you broke," Gabriel protested.

"Which is more than anyone else was willing to do or thought possible," Lucifer said.

"Still, I don't think-"

"Just leave it," Raphael interrupted. "I would hate for all this to be settled and then flare up again and everyone takes to arms because Lucifer wasn't thanked for peace."

"Will you thank me for peace?" Lucifer asked curiously.

Raphael just blinked at him.

"I wouldn't start a war over something so trivial," Lucifer insisted.

"Did you or did you not start a war because you thought Father loved a flawed species too much?" Raphael asked.

"That's hardly _trivial_," Lucifer argued.

Michael raised an eyebrow. "Really? That's not what you said when you decided to just forget about the whole thing."

"You're taking what I said completely out of context," Lucifer objected.

"Hey, what happened to 'don't needle Lucifer, he'll lose it and start killing people'?" Gabriel asked.

"I'm really not that bad!"

"Lucifer has assured us he has more self-control than that," Raphael said.

"And we believe him?" Gabriel asked skeptically. "Lucifer? Really?"

"I don't know if that's a dig about my trustworthiness or my self-control but, either way, I'm offended," Lucifer announced.

"You can prove your trustworthiness _and _your self-control by not flying off the handle while we're opening doubting you," Michael advised. "Everybody wins this way."

"Everybody but me," Lucifer said.

"You're going to have to learn how to have people pick at you without stabbing someone if you're going to keep the peace," Raphael told him.

"But I've spent thousands of years rebelling and consorting with demons," Lucifer pointed out. "_Everybody _is going to have something to say to me! Am I really supposed to just quietly take all of it?"

"First of all, no one said anything about quietly," Gabriel said. "I've never taken anything quietly in my _life_. Even when I went off to join the pagans and was trying to hide where I'd gone, I was very loud about it."

"I mean, we didn't realize that he was leaving at the time," Michael added. "But he certainly was loud about it."

"Also, no one said anything about allowing everyone to say what they will to you," Raphael said. "When we say 'people' what we mean is one of us. The humans, definitely, although as long as you're not wiping all of them out we don't care what you do to individual humans."

"I am honor-bound to stop you from killing the Winchesters," Michael said. "But other than that knock yourself out."

"They're probably the two who would say the most," Lucifer complained.

"Then stay away from them," Raphael suggested. "Castiel, too, will probably say things but if Father is still alive, evidence suggests he favors Castiel. Are you sure you didn't bring him back to life?"

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Yes, I'm sure. That's not really the kind of thing you do accidentally or forget about. And if I had changed the past you wouldn't remember having killed him. Like with Anna."

"I never killed Anna," Raphael said, confused. "Or was that the point?"

"No, it was…never mind," Lucifer said. "Gabriel, I'm mad at you."

Gabriel shrugged. "As long as you're not stabby mad I can live with it."

"What did you do?" Michael asked. "You don't look surprised."

"I'm surprised," Gabriel lied. He clearly knew what Lucifer was talking about.

"You told Sam and Dean how they could trap me back in hell."

Raphael and Michael gave Gabriel twin disbelieving looks.

Gabriel smiled uncomfortably. "In my defense, I had no idea you were planning to settle this peacefully! And as you can see, it didn't come to that."

"Only because Sam Winchester was unable to overpower me. If he were, he would have trapped us both forever and it would have been completely unnecessary. I'm doing wonderfully and, last I checked, he and his revived family and friends seem to be doing well, too."

"Then it's a good thing Sam can't overpower you," Gabriel said. "I mean, come on, Lucifer. Odds on you two actually finding common ground were frankly terrible. I still can't believe it happened. I just wanted to save your life! Is that so wrong?"

"Yes," Lucifer said immediately. "If I had to choose between death now and going back, even temporarily, then someone just stab me right now."

"You're being dramatic," Gabriel accused.

"Would you like to visit the cage and see what that's like?"

"You would trap Lucifer in a cage forever in hell as a favor to him?" Michael couldn't believe it.

Gabriel shrugged. "That and possibly saving your life, Michael, and sparing one of you having to kill the other and hopefully saving humanity."

"I will never understand you and your humanity thing," Raphael said, shaking his head.

"Maybe if you'd actually spoken to some humans, gotten to know them," Gabriel offered. "I mean, some of them suck, don't get me wrong. I've had my fun with them. Others were misguided and I had to get on the right path but we all make mistakes. But some of them are really good."

"The human that I have had the most interaction with in quite some time is Dean Winchester," Raphael said. "As Michel's destined vessel, even if that did not necessarily work out, he is supposed to be an exemplar. He helped Castiel trap me in holy oil. He insulted me and said several extremely disturbing things about Father. If that is the best humanity has to offer then I have no need to look closer."

"Eh, Dean's a little rough around the edges but ultimately he's a good guy. You might like some softer-spoken and more deferential people better," Gabriel said.

"I will have to take your word for it as I have no interest in seeing for myself," Raphael said.

Michael was smiling. Michael was standing there and watching them bicker and smiling. It wasn't as though he were miserable before. He had his moments but he had accepted the abandonment of several of their most important family members with grace and sought to carry on with no instructions the best he could. Yes he did have some delusions about actually knowing what they were supposed to do but that seemed harmless. He hadn't been terribly unhappy but it had been nothing like this, either.

In spite of all the confusion and chaos this could cause, in spite of the fact that they couldn't go through with their plans for the apocalypse after all, in spite of the fact that – for the most part – they were tired and nothing had changed…In spite of all of that, Raphael couldn't find it in himself to regret that this had happened, if only for that.

Michael noticed his attention. "What?"

"I was just thinking that I warned you that this would happen when you went to Lucifer in the first place," Raphael said.

Michael laughed. "That you did. You were against it, as I recall."

Raphael looked at Gabriel and Lucifer pointedly. "Can you blame me?"

"Hey!"

"Really, brother."

"Maybe not," Michael said, grinning. "But as for me, I think I made the right choice ignoring you. Maybe I should do it more often."

"Let's not get crazy," Raphael said. "Happy ending or not, if this sort of deviation from the plan becomes the norm then I shall have to lodge a complaint."

"With _who_?" Gabriel asked. "Michael, who will be ignoring you?"

"I certainly won't be listening," Lucifer said.

"Maybe," Raphael said slowly, "I will join Castiel on his quest for God."

"Was that character growth?" Gabriel asked. "I think that was character growth!"

The End!


End file.
